Ladies, are modern day options crippling? Do you spend way too much time deciding between which primary color to wear and enjoy the thrill of voting against your basic needs? Well do we have a future for you!

Kelly puts all her eggs in Margaret Atwood's basket. This Canadian author wrote a long form poem that chills, maybe not thrills, but certainly instills a fear for our future autonomy. We humans need love, touch, communication, and most importantly...to read. Apparently "my body my choice" translates into Latin as "Nolite Te Bastardes Carborundorum."

Civil war! Canada! Men! Clitoridectomies! The tv series The Handmaid's Tale might not have the subtle haunting poetry of the novel, but the bodies be swinging under his eye. If you don't want to delve in the cold waters of prose to understand how your human rights are at stake, maybe Elizabeth Moss' face will get you freaked enough to swear off red. Commander Jimmy certainly thinks so.

If you're Offred or just Off-men we've got you covered. Whether you choose book or TV show, it's a perfect May Day for a revolution.

May the month of May be ever in your favor! Odds are, if you’re a kid in a Seeing Read book/movie… you won’t make it out alive. That’s just fine in Panem where Jim and Kelly have found some high ground to stand on, weapons of choice in hand. Can the Hunger Games book take on its blockbuster movie twin in hand to hand combat? Can both book and movie win the games if they’re from the same District? Not for all the money in the Capitol.

Jim and Kelly discover that Suzanne Collins workshopped the trauma of her previous job at Nickelodeon into the pages of her beloved trilogy. Her take on child abuse in the media may have had a root somewhere in there, or maybe it’s just the tracker jacker venom speaking. On a lighter (read: blonder) note Jennifer Lawrence brought Katniss Everdeen to the big screen and was devoured by the masses. Did her face lead a revolution or were book readers left with a less violent and emotive version of this YA splash hit? Aim your opinions high and hope you’ll hit your target… it’s only time before HBO max muttations this into another spin off. Nothing a berry cleanse can’t fix!

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If you’re a bird, I’m a bird! Unless you were a book first. Not that any of us will remember by the end of this.

Jim and Kelly are ready to prove that there’s nothing sexier than a story about the tragedy of aging. Grab a marble notebook, a colored pen and some Viagra cause it’s time to tackle the Notebook.

Nicholas Sparks found a way to our hearts and a healthy paycheck by way of the romance genre. His sexiness remains refuted by Kelly.

In 2004 we saw the meteoric rise of the Gos-God and Rachel McAdams in the film adaptation. Somehow making swans and the 1940s seem less aggressive.

Can a movie do what it’s never done before and ADD character development and plot? Does Jim and James Marsden have a shot at redemption? Can Kelly be moved to tears by the book equivalent to a LiveJournal entry? Or is Ryan Gosling just rowing us all towards a literal and figurative dead end.

It’s never too late to jot down your steamiest moments with your partner on paper. Just hide it from the kids. They’ll wish to forget it as much as Jim and Kelly did.