What if the fastest way to a stronger marriage isn’t compromise, but better teamwork? After celebrating a number-one Amazon launch, I took a hard look at what actually helped us get there—clear roles, honest communication, and a shared commitment to play the same game on the same side. The result is a practical, story-rich guide to treating marriage like the ultimate team sport, with four moves you can use tonight.

I start by reframing “opposites” as assets: the planner and the risk-taker, the night owl and the early bird, the introvert and the extrovert. Instead of fighting to be the same, I show how to deploy differences like positions on the field so your team covers more ground with less friction.

Then I talk about offense and defence, who pushes the ball forward in finances, fun, and intimacy, and who protects the goal with boundaries, savings, and rest, so you can balance initiative with stability without making it personal.

From there, I dig into communication that actually works: daily 20-minute huddles to align priorities, weekly date nights for team bonding, and a yearly strategy getaway to recalibrate goals. I dismantle the mind-reading myth with real scripts for clear asks, and break down why keeping score breeds rivalry while an us-vs-problem mindset restores momentum. You’ll hear candid examples, from celebrating wins to handling those “seams” where balls drop and leave with a simple weekly challenge to spot, name, and thank each other’s strengths.

If you’re ready to stop arguing about who’s right and start winning together, this episode gives you the plays, the language, and the mindset to build a championship marriage.

Bad Marriage Advice is now an Amazon #1 Best Seller. If you haven’t gotten your copy yet, go get your copy here: https://a.co/d/4XaHmA5.
And if you’ve gotten your copy and had a chance to look through it, do me a huge solid and go back to Amazon and leave a review here: https://www.amazon.com/review/create-review/?&asin=B0FQ46HG3S.

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Today's interview is with my oldest son, Jake and his new wife, Livvy to chat about the new book I wrote for them and unpack five of the most common myths that sabotage new marriages and trade them for simple habits that build trust, respect and joy. Thinks we talk about in the episode are:

• faith first, spouse second as good advice from Livvy's Dad
• seeing parents model affection, repair and service
• differentiation over “you complete me”
• mind reading myths versus clear, simple requests
• growth includes discomfort and honest repair
• why happy couples do fight and how to do it well
• address small stuff early to prevent resentment
• learning together through books and shared language
• teamwork during stressful seasons and daily service
• date night as a sacred ritual for connection

If you’re newly engaged, early in marriage, or simply ready to trade fairytales for a stronger relationship, this one’s for you. Listen, share with a partner, and tell us: which myth are you ready to replace? If you enjoyed this conversation, you'll definately love my new book - Bad Marriage Advice: Debunking Myths That Will Make You Miserable and What To Do Instead. It's available October 1st on Amazon. Go to www.badmarriageadvice.com to get the book!

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Bad sexual advice is one of the top reasons couples struggle early in marriage, often because most grow up with distorted expectations about what a healthy sex life looks like.

• Sex advice is usually messed up because the topic is taboo in most families
• Most couples start marriage with distorted expectations about their sex life
• "A Good Wife Keeps Her Husband Satisfied" creates an unhealthy obligation dynamic
• Healthy sex is mutual with both partners free to say yes or no
• The myth that "men always want it and women never do" oversimplifies desire
• Desire varies from person to person and changes in every season of life
• Understanding "bridges to desire" helps couples communicate about intimacy
• The myth that "great sex should happen naturally" creates disappointment
• Most couples have one partner with spontaneous desire and one with responsive desire
• Great sex takes communication, intentionality, and sometimes scheduling
• Sex is a journey, not a destination – you'll grow and learn together
• Sex is more about connection than performance
• Communication is essential – you can't fix what you don't talk about
• Sexual satisfaction gets better over time when you make it a priority

Go get your copy of Bad Marriage Advice on October 1st, and join me next week for a special episode where I'll interview my oldest son and his wife about what they wish they'd known before marriage.

If you are ready to work with a coach around these topics, email me at: moni@monicatanner.com.

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