Greetings adventurer! ⚔️🎲

Welcome to the sixth episode of Roll The Old Bones, a weekly audio podcast about learning to play Dungeons & Dragons, featuring silly sketches and comic interludes.

In this episode, Duncan leads Andy through the Lazurian Maze, playing the role of a Warlock in search of a mystical French Horn and accompanied by a Tressym familiar named “Swann” through a series of encounters that celebrate the songs of British comedy duo, Flanders and Swann. After taking damage from a falling piano as penance for failing to make Duncan laugh in last week’s Dad Joke of the Week, we pit ourselves against Los Olvidados in a corrida d'olivas, taking serious damage from the Olivador, dodging the Picador with his pick, and the Matador with his mat. We follow footprints of boot and sock to track the League of British Bedstead Men, get totally confused whilst dodging machinery in the Wompom refinery, console the lovelorn Armadillo singing to an armour-plated tank, and stand firm against vicious pedantry of a very an-Gry G-nu, the g-nicest work of g-nature in the zoo driven to attack after being mistaken for an Elk.

Along the way, we catch up with Sidney the Wandering Monster hunting for some ointment, listen to an advert for Hello Flesh, a meal delivery service for zombies. We also peek in on The Dark Lord who’s All-Seeing Eye has developed conjunctivitis. Andy tries on some freezing cold Necromantic Mail sent in by a fan, and The Singing Sword fails to impress judge Simon Growel in "Beholder's Got Talons" with a song entitled "The Last Weep of the Woggler".

We finish things off with another carefully crafted, Dungeons and Dragons-themed Dad Joke. This week Andy is hoping to get a laugh instead of a groan.

If you want to support us, then visit our Ko-Fi page at https://ko-fi.com/rolltheoldbones where you can drop us the price of a cup of coffee and get your name added to our Oubliette of Oblivion.

It’s actual Dungeons & Dragons newbie gameplay mixed with absurd audio comedy, Dad jokes and family-friendly D&D.

⏳ CHAPTERS

0:00 Opening Theme

0:38 Welcome & Introduction

4:43 Sidney the Wandering Monster

5:11 Game Play 1

11:04 Realm of the Dark Lord

13:49 Game Play 2

25:30 Short Rest – Spooksavers

26:34 Gameplay 3

30:57 From the Mailbag

32:40 Game Play 3 continues

38:17 Beholders Got Talons

40:19 Game Play 4

50:49 Dad Joke of the Week

52:05 Oubliette of Oblivion

53:22 Closing Music