What does it take to raise four children across two continents, and still like each other at the end of it?

In this deeply personal Selam & Hello original, Lilly invites her husband of 27 years, Dr. Ben Piper, into the studio for an honest, funny and tender conversation about modern(ish?) African(ish?) parenting. After 24 years of raising four children and two decades on the continent, the two reflect on what they got right, what they got wrong, and what they are still figuring out.

This isn't an advice episode. Questions drawn blind from a bowl, many sent in by listeners, turn the interview into a true co-hosted conversation. Lilly and Ben ask each other about raising a child with dyslexia, and about breastfeeding twins in graduate school with no kitchen sink. They cover parenting with behaviorism, and the emotional decision to stay in Kenya while all four children eventually moved to the US.

The conversation also goes to harder places: the risks Black sons face in the United States, femicide and gender-based violence in Kenya, and Lilly's experience of postpartum depression in a time when few rarely talked about maternal mental health. Through it all runs a family philosophy that Lilly and Ben still live by: no credit, no blame - and love in it all.

In this episode:

📚What raising a child with dyslexia taught a literacy expert that the research never did

🗣️How to advocate for your child at school by setting the bar before teachers set it for you

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦Four kids, twins and grad school: why community made all the difference

🌍Staying in Africa while the children built lives in America: did they win the argument?

💛Mental health, postpartum depression and letting children see their parents cry

🏡Empty nest, grown-up children and grandparent names (it's Lulu or nothing!)

About Dr. Ben Piper

Dr. Benjamin Piper is the Director of Global Education at the Gates Foundation, based in Nairobi, where his work focuses on foundational literacy and numeracy. He has spent his career helping children learn to read across Africa and holds a doctorate from Harvard University. He is also, as he'll tell you, the second-most memorable parent.

Learn more:

• Dr. Ben Piper on LinkedIn: https://ke.linkedin.com/in/benjamin-piper-42a89a32
• Gates Foundation: https://www.gatesfoundation.org/

Selam & Hello is a Pan-African storytelling platform where Africa and her diaspora come to think, reflect and be heard.

• Find us: https://linktr.ee/selamandhello
• Website: https://www.selamandhello.com/
• Instagram / YouTube: @selamandhello
• Email: lilly@selamandhello.com | producer@selamandhello.com

Music Credits: Selam & Hello Jingle by Silas Piper

All platforms @silaspiper / https://www.youtube.com/@SilasPiper