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This week, Kim talks with therapist, writer, and activist Jen Gallagher about women’s rage in midlife and why it deserves to be taken seriously instead of minimized. The conversation connects emotional suppression, perimenopause, and physical health, while giving listeners a clearer way to understand rage as information, not failure.

Key topics

• In this episode, Kim introduces Jen Gallagher and frames the discussion around rage as a topic many women feel but rarely talk about openly.
• Jen shares how her own autoimmune illness became the turning point that pushed her to examine how much she had been prioritizing everyone else over herself.
• She describes how rage showed up in her own life first as road rage, which made her realize she was carrying more suppressed anger than she had admitted.
• They discuss how women’s rage is often layered over years of self-neglect, people pleasing, and emotional minimizing.
• Jen explains that rage in midlife is often tied to both accumulation and hormonal change, especially the loss of estrogen’s calming effect.
• Kim and Jen talk about how often women are told, “It’s just perimenopause,” and why that explanation can erase real emotional and physical needs.
• Jen shares a powerful example of a woman whose unresolved rage surfaced in a dramatic moment at home, leading to deeper clarity about her marriage and her own needs.
• The conversation highlights shame and embarrassment as major reasons women do not talk about anger, even when it is clearly affecting their lives.
• Jen explains that therapy, journaling, and honest conversation can help women process rage safely and identify what it is trying to reveal.
• They connect suppressed rage with physical stress, inflammation, and chronic activation of stress chemicals like cortisol and adrenaline.
• Kim and Jen discuss how over apologizing and centering other people’s comfort can keep women disconnected from their own truth.
• Jen reframes rage as an approach emotion, something that can fuel courage, boundary setting, and necessary change.
• The episode closes with a message of self-worth and permission: women are worth the time and attention it takes to understand what they feel.

Connect with Jen on her website: jengallaghercounseling.com and take her rage quiz.

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