Dark. Angry. Hopeful. That’s how Lance described the piece Amy starts us off with today. Based on what we’ve learned from others who have ever had to say goodbye to an old life or mourn a dream that will never come true, we think y’all might relate. It is in part this very discovery - that so many others can relate to the struggle that Amy has faced these past 6+ years - that is itself healing. That plus the act of recognizing and allowing ourselves to mourn the future we once thought we’d have but now never will have been transformative. We talk through how those processes worked for us, and discuss a couple of studies that help provide insight. Hoping it’s of use for you. BTW, this is our last episode this season. Stay tuned for Season 3!

RIP Me

She left long before I understood she was gone. Like the frog on slow boil. First the heat in her throat. Next aching sweats. At last a deep and foggy sleep. Long COVID took the only me I've known. Replaced by an eery copy. Almost familiar but off in ways too sorry and sad to recite. I wonder how long this stranger plans to linger. I mourn the original she replaced. I rage at the tattered system holding us hostage.

Amy Blackstone died on March 15, 2020 though her fate was sealed five days earlier when she boarded a plane bound for Des Moines, Iowa, the next stop on a tour to promote her book CHILDFREE BY CHOICE (Dutton/Penguin Random House, 2019). It was then that Dr. Blackstone picked up a companion, a viral squatter known as severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 that hasn’t left her side since.

Continues at https://amyblackstonephd.substack.com/p/rip-me

CITED IN THIS EPISODE

1. Sara, DiCaglio. 2025. "Return to Normal? Remembered Futures and the Post-Pandemic." Medical Humanities:9.
2. Ireson J, Taylor A, Richardson E, Greenfield B, Jones G. Exploring invisibility and epistemic injustice in Long Covid—a citizen science qualitative analysis of patient stories from an online Covid community. Health Expectations. 2022; 25: 1753-1765. doi:10.1111/hex.13518

Intro music: Humoresque by Antonín Dvořák from Suzuki Flute School Volume 3; Played proudly and poorly by Amy Blackstone

Outro music: Moon Over Ruined Castle by Rentarō Taki from Suzuki Flute School Volume 1; Played proudly and poorly by Amy Blackstone

For more information, go to amyblackstonephd.com.

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