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When you envision bringing a child into the world, nobody prepares you for the possibility of walking through the double doors of a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. The flashing lights, the constant hum of monitors, and the physical barrier of an isolette can leave birthing and perinatal individuals feeling isolated, helpless, and completely detached from the experience they imagined.

In this episode of Quiet Connection, I'm sitting down with Julie Hatch, a seasoned Pediatric and Neonatal Nurse Practitioner with over 30 years of experience in the NICU. Julie shares what it's truly like on the front lines of infant intensive care, from the sudden rush of high-risk admissions to the quiet, profound moments where parents and nurses carry hope for each other.

We break down the reality of hospital environments, debunking common misconceptions about who ends up in the NICU and why. Beyond the technical machinery, Julie reminds us that a parent’s energy and unconditional love are deeply felt by their little ones, even through the porthole of an incubator.

If you've ever felt robbed of those initial bonding moments, or if you're currently navigating the uncertainty of a medical journey with your child, this conversation offers a gentle reminder: taking care of your own mental health isn't a luxury, it's essential. Hope isn't something you have to carry alone.

Key Takeaways

• The NICU is a Built-In Village: While terrifying, the NICU creates an unexpected community of nurses, social workers, and fellow parents who support one another through shared trauma and triumph.
• Hope is a Vital Tool: When medical answers aren't immediate, holding onto hope, or letting your care team hold it for you, helps carry you through the hour-by-hour uncertainty.
• Parental Energy Transcends Physical Touch: Even when a baby is too fragile to be held, your calm presence, voice, and energy send powerful signals of safety and love.
• Self-Care is Not Failure: Prioritizing your own mental health and rest as a parent directly impacts your child's wellbeing. You can't pour from an empty cup.
• Bridging Eastern and Western Medicine: Western medicine saves lives in acute crises, but Eastern practices like acupuncture offer crucial support for long-term stress, PMHDS recovery, and nervous system regulation.

Don't forget to visit Vermont Birth Network to learn more about connecting with perinatal and postpartum practitioners in Vermont!

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In this episode of Quiet Connection, host Chelsea Myers sits down with Hilary Hodge, author of the upcoming book The Art of Parenting While Sick. Living in the beautiful Loire Valley of France, Hilary navigates the daily, often invisible grind of severe asthma and adrenal insufficiency while raising her five-year-old son.

Chelsea and Hilary dive deep into the unique realities of being a perinatal individual with a chronic illness. They unpack the heavy, constant weight of mom guilt, flip the script on what an "able" parent looks like, and share why parenting from the couch can actually be a beautiful space for deep connection.

Hilary also shares highly practical, life-saving advice on how to create a family medical emergency plan, prepare young kids for unpredictable hospital stays, and demystify daily medications without creating fear.

Whether you're navigating a lifelong disability, a new diagnosis, or just general parenting overwhelm, this episode will remind you that you're doing a wonderful job and your journey matters.

Key Takeaways

• The Chronic Illness Superpower: Perinatal individuals managing disabilities often develop a unique parenting superpower. They give up perfectionism early on, master flexibility, and raise incredibly resilient, empathetic children.
• Reframing "Parenting from the Couch": You don't have to chase your toddler across a playground to be an amazing parent. Slower, low-mobility moments create intentional, high-quality spaces for emotional connection.
• The "Fire Extinguisher" Emergency Method: Just like practicing fire safety, walking your children through a 5-minute plan for 911 calls or flare-up days removes the chaos and anxiety from actual medical crises.
• Demystifying Medications: Keeping kids safely informed about medical gear (like nebulizers or pillboxes) satisfies their natural curiosity and prevents them from viewing your illness as a scary, unspeakable secret.
• Healthcare Systems Compared: Hilary notes how France's healthcare system provides immense, low-cost structural support for long-term conditions and birth recovery, though the US remains highly progressive in its open conversations surrounding mental health care.

Soundbites

• "Maybe disabled parents are more fit to be parents. They're more creative. They're more resilient. They're so used to being flexible... They've given up on perfectionism years ago."
  
  
• "This parenting from the couch thing could actually be a blessing... there's so much that you can do from home."
  
  
• "Our kids have only ever known us this way. That empathy is a superpower that's built into our kids because this is the life that we live."
  
  
• "It's like a fire extinguisher. If there's a grease fire, it's pandemonium because no one remembers how to use it. But if you take five minutes to walk through it ahead of time, when it happens, it's so much less chaotic."
  
  
• "I was just sobbing, 'I just want to be a mom. I can't take care of my kids.' And my therapist said, 'Why can't you? You are a mom.' You can keep parenting from the bed, even if you feel awful."

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Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection

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In this episode of Quiet Confessions, Chelsea takes a step back from personal musings to focus on advocacy and education surrounding perinatal mental health disorders (PMHDS). Recording from their late grandmother’s house, Chelsea reflects on channeling their hero's legacy to make others feel seen, loved, and valued.

Chelsea explains the range of PMHDS, covering topics like perinatal depression, anxiety, panic disorder, OCD, postpartum rage, substance use disorder, and postpartum psychosis. They address common misconceptions, detailing the vital differences between intrusive thoughts in perinatal OCD and the true break from reality seen in postpartum psychosis. Chelsea stresses that PMHDS are treatable, recovery is 100% possible, and lifting the weight of silence can be the first step toward healing.

Key Takeaways

• PMHDS Affect Many: One in five perinatal individuals and one in ten partners experience a perinatal mental health disorder.
• Beyond Stereotypical Depression: Perinatal depression isn't always crying; it can present as feeling completely numb or going through the motions while feeling detached from yourself.
• Hypervigilance and OCD: Perinatal OCD often involves intrusive thoughts coupled with compulsive rituals (like counting baby's breaths or rigid schedules) aimed at quelling extreme anxiety.
• Understanding Postpartum Psychosis: Postpartum psychosis involves a true break from reality, including hallucinations and delusions. Chelsea clarifies that many delusions center on intense protection rather than harm.
• Recovery is Possible: All perinatal mental health disorders are temporary and treatable with appropriate support, medical care, and professional intervention.

If you or someone you love is navigating a perinatal mental health disorder, resources are available:

• Visit Postpartum Support International to connect with local providers, specialized support groups, and trained peer mentors.

This episode discusses topics that may be triggering for some individuals. Please check the show notes for more information and be mindful of your own mental health and comfort levels.

Visit our Patreon to help support our mission to normalize the conversation and end the stigma surrounding PMADs!

Support the show

Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection

Want to be a guest on Quiet Connection - Postpartum Mental Health?
Send Chelsea a message on PodMatch

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In this episode of Quiet Connection, Chelsea sits down with Jessica Hill, co-founder of The Parent Collective. Jessica opens up about her transition into motherhood while living overseas in London, where an unexpected medical scare with her newborn sparked a season of hypervigilance and postpartum anxiety.

We talk about the raw grief of adding a second child, the stark differences between maternal care systems in the UK and the US, and why having a built-in peer cohort is the ultimate antidote to early parenthood isolation.

Whether you're in the trenches of the newborn phase or navigating life with teenagers, this conversation is a beautiful reminder to extend yourself some grace.

Key Takeaways

• The Reality of Maternal Systems: The UK maternal health model builds community and continuous care through midwives and home visits, whereas the US system often leaves perinatal individuals feeling clinical and isolated after birth.
• The Trap of Maternal Gatekeeping: Postpartum anxiety and hypervigilance can cause us to tightly control routines, which unintentionally shuts out partners who are simply trying to bond in their own way.
• Grieving the Shift to Two: It’s completely normal to feel deep grief during a second pregnancy over losing the exclusive, uninterrupted bond you share with your first child.
• Community is Postpartum Medicine: Having a cohort of peers who are in the exact same seasonal trenches (diaper blowouts, sleep regressions) reduces the risk of PMHDS and shields against isolation.

Support the show

Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection

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With the Lindsay Clancy trial dominating headlines right now, the media is full of sensationalized coverage that instills fear and demonizes birthing individuals in crisis. But sensationalism doesn't save lives; truth, proper medical training, and early intervention do.

In this episode of Quiet Confessions, I'm stepping away from our scheduled series to address the reality of postpartum psychosis (PPP).

I share the crucial differences between intrusive thoughts and psychotic delusions, break down the staggering lack of PMHD training in maternal healthcare, and unpack why criminalizing medical emergencies fails everyone.

If the current news cycle has felt heavy or triggering, this conversation is here to give you facts, validate your feelings, and remind you that you are never alone.

• Resource Links Mentioned in Episode:
  • Postpartum Support International (PSI): postpartum.net
  • National Maternal Mental Health Hotline: Call or text 1-833-TLC-MAMA (1-833-852-6262)
  • Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988
  • Emergency Support: Call 911 or visit your nearest emergency room.

Key Takeaways

• The Reality Behind the Numbers: Postpartum psychosis occurs in 1 to 2 out of every 1,000 births. Extreme tragic outcomes occur in only 2% to 4% of cases, primarily when individuals are undiagnosed, misdiagnosed, or improperly treated.
• Delusions vs. Intrusive Thoughts: Intrusive thoughts are unwanted and jarring, but you recognize them as separate from yourself. Delusions in postpartum psychosis represent a complete break from reality where the belief feels entirely real.
• Systemic Healthcare Failures: OBGYNs, midwives, and PCPs receive almost no required training on PMHDs. A single six-week postpartum checkup is nowhere near enough to monitor birthing individuals.
• Prescription Risks & Rapid Changes: Bouncing between complex psychiatric medications without proper oversight can escalate a crisis rather than resolve it.
• Why Silence is Dangerous: Staying silent out of fear perpetuates shame and keeps parents from seeking help. Open conversations and systemic healthcare reform are what truly save lives.

*Correction: There is excellent PMHD training available through Postpartum Support International, but it is not required when obtaining initial licensure for mental health professionals or medical professionals.

This episode discusses topics that may be triggering for some individuals. Please check the show notes for more information and be mindful of your own mental health and comfort levels.

Visit our Patreon to help support our mission to normalize the conversation and end the stigma surrounding PMADs!

Support the show

Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection

Want to be a guest on Quiet Connection - Postpartum Mental Health?
Send Chelsea a message on PodMatch

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What happens when the vision you have for your birth completely shatters?

In this episode of Quiet Connection, host Chelsea Myers sits down with Lainey Stancil—a mom, birth doula, and the founder of the Peach State Birth Coalition. Lainey shares her deeply personal journey of navigating a frustrating PCOS diagnosis , fighting a dismissive healthcare system , and making the radical choice to switch to an unmedicated home birth at 28 weeks pregnant.

But Lainey's story didn't end with her fast, beautiful water birth. After discovering the shocking legal restrictions placed on traditional midwives in Georgia, she stepped into her power to change the landscape for birthing individuals across her state.

This conversation is an eye-opening look at maternal healthcare deserts , the power of community education , and why every perinatal individual deserves to choose exactly how and where they bring life into the world.

Key Takeaways

• Trusting Your Instincts: Lainey highlights the exhaustion of fighting with medical providers who dismiss early signs of hormonal issues like PCOS simply based on age.
• The Power of True Connection: The stark contrast between a clinical, highly managed OB appointment and the warm, relationship-first care of a midwife.
• Georgia’s Quiet Crisis: The surprising legal reality that makes it illegal for traditional midwives to practice or attend home births in Georgia, creating an "underground" network.
• Maternity Care Deserts: How the closure of birth centers and lack of regional providers forces rural birthing individuals to travel hours just to receive safe care.
• Democratizing Education: Why providing free, doula-led birth education is essential for lower-income families who can't afford expensive online programs.

This episode discusses topics that may be triggering for some individuals. Please check the show notes for more information and be mindful of your own mental health and comfort levels.

Visit our Patreon to help support our mission to normalize the conversation and end the stigma surrounding PMADs!

Support the show

Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection

Want to be a guest on Quiet Connection - Postpartum Mental Health?
Send Chelsea a message on PodMatch

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In this deeply moving episode of Quiet Connection, Chelsea sits down with Adriana Sanchez, a stay-at-home mom and college student who shares her raw journey through two high-risk pregnancies, consecutive NICU stays, and severe postpartum mental health crises.

Adriana opens up about how her "go with the flow" life shifted dramatically when her first baby arrived prematurely at 32 weeks. When her second pregnancy was complicated by severe preeclampsia at 28 weeks, she found herself in a terrifying spiral of panic attacks, suicidal ideation, and intrusive hallucinations.

This conversation shines a necessary light on the biological realities of PMHDS and serves as a vital reminder that fighting for your life sometimes looks like asking for professional help.

Connect with Adriana on Facebook or Instagram.

Key Takeaways

• The Myth of the Immunity Village: Even with a strong, loving support system, perinatal individuals aren't immune to severe physical and mental health crises.
• Trauma Compounds: A previous traumatic birth or difficult trying-to-conceive journey can severely heighten anxiety and PTSD in subsequent pregnancies.
• Postpartum Preeclampsia is Physical and Mental: Sudden spikes in blood pressure and aggressive medical treatments like magnesium drips cause severe physical dazes that deeply impact mental well-being.
• Validation is the Turning Point: True healing often begins when a professional validates that your experience is biological and normal, stripping away the internal guilt and self-blame.

Impactful Soundbites

(29:44) Chelsea Myers: "Just because it's in your head doesn't mean it's not in your body either. It is insane what your mental health can do to your body."

(42:17) Adriana Sanchez: "Get it out, take it off my hands and you fix me. For my husband, it was like me giving up, but no, it was me fighting for an answer, fighting for a treatment, fighting for validation."

(46:22) Adriana Sanchez: "What could be wrong today is not what's gonna be wrong tomorrow. I just try to keep telling myself that I'm okay, and then just hug my kids."

This episode discusses topics that may be triggering for some individuals. Please check the show notes for more information and be mindful of your own mental health and comfort levels.

Visit our Patreon to help support our mission to normalize the conversation and end the stigma surrounding PMADs!

Support the show

Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection

Want to be a guest on Quiet Connection - Postpartum Mental Health?
Send Chelsea a message on PodMatch

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Content Warning: This episode contains detailed discussions of medical trauma, postpartum hemorrhage, psychiatric hospitalizations, and suicidal ideation. Please protect your mental health while listening.

Welcome back to Quiet Confessions, a mini-episode of Quiet Connection where I sit down to chat one-on-one with you about my personal journey.

In honor of Birth Trauma Awareness Week, I'm re-airing a deeply personal episode from season five. Today, we're talking about traumaversaries: the anniversaries of the hardest moments of our lives. For many birthing individuals and parents, these anniversaries are tied to perinatal mental health disorders (PMHDs) and birth trauma.

I'm sharing my own story, including my scheduled C-section that turned terrifying, a severe postpartum hemorrhage at home, surviving three psychiatric hospitalizations, and later facing a brain hemorrhage from a pituitary tumor. I open up about what it's like to live with PTSD, face flashbacks, and handle the heavy seasons on the calendar.

There is no toxic positivity here. I won't tell you that everything happens for a reason. But I will tell you that you aren't alone, your feelings are entirely valid, and we can survive these hard seasons together.

Key Takeaways

• What is a Traumaversary: A traumaversary is the anniversary of a traumatic event. For many parents and birthing individuals, these milestones are deeply tied to birth trauma and perinatal mental health challenges.
• Chelsea’s Timeline of Survival: A look at how a scheduled C-section spiraled into a spinal headache, a life-threatening postpartum hemorrhage at home, severe PMHDs, three psychiatric hospitalizations, and eventually, a brain hemorrhage from a pituitary tumor.
• The Reality of PTSD & Flashbacks: Trauma doesn't just disappear. Flashbacks can bring back the sights, smells, and physical sensations of the original trauma, especially when the anniversary season rolls around.
• Saying No to Silver Linings: It's completely okay to hate "silver linings". You don't have to find a beautiful lesson in the worst things that happened to you. You didn't deserve it, but you can still find gratitude for where you are today without romanticizing the pain.
• Tools for Navigation: Surviving a traumaversary means reminding yourself that you're safe, you aren't in that dark place anymore, and you're surrounded by love.

Soundbites

• "A traumaversary is the anniversary of any form of trauma that happened to you... and that anniversary may bring about some big feelings. Or it may not. It's a deeply personal thing."
• "I say I missed the first six months of my daughter's life due to my perinatal mood and anxiety disorders and being hospitalized for those several times."
• "I hate silver linings. I don't like the idea of them. I feel like what I went through was not okay, and I didn't deserve it. You didn't deserve whatever it was that you went through, either."
• "No, I'm not thankful for what happened to me, but I am grateful for what has come of it."
• "If you have experienced trauma and you are triggered or much more aware of big feelings around the time of year that these things happened to you, I see you. Your feelings are so valid."

This episode discusses topics that may be triggering for some individuals. Please check the show notes for more information and be mindful of your own mental health and comfort levels.

Visit our Patreon to help support our mission to normalize the conversation and end the stigma surrounding PMADs!

Support the show

Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection

Want to be a guest on Quiet Connection - Postpartum Mental Health?
Send Chelsea a message on PodMatch