Ways to work with The Luxury Lesbian™ Matchmaker, Sophia Spallino:

💎Platinum Private Luxury Lesbian™ Matchmaking – For the woman who wants her Future Wife® delivered on a silver platter, I do all the screening so you can focus on falling in love.

Explore Private Matchmaking: https://queercountryclub.com/private-lesbian-matchmaking-service

✨Exclusive Luxury Lesbian™ Retreat at Canyon Ranch – A blissful weekend with an intimate group of extraordinary single queer women… curated to spoil your senses and reignite your belief in love and possibility.

Join The Luxury Lesbian™ Getaway: https://queercountryclub.com/luxury-lesbian-retreat

❤️The Queer Country Club® – Our premier dating platform for monogamous queer women who are living amazing lives, but missing just one thing… their Future Partner®.

Apply to Join QCC: https://queercountryclub.com

🌈 Private Rising Coaching Session – If you're unsure of your next step but know in your gut you're ready to call in love, deepen self-trust, or design a life you’re proud of, I’m here to guide you.

Reserve A Private Coaching Session: https://sophiaspallino.com/private-coaching

💬Got Qs? DM on Instagram → @sophiaspallino https://instagram.com/sophiaspallino

🔺Get Wisp Kitty Care 🐱 Proud Partner

https://bit.ly/sophiawisp

In this episode of Queer Women Rising, we unpack one of the most common and most complicated dynamics in queer relationships: lesbian exes who stay best friends.

For some women, it’s a beautiful sign of maturity and emotional growth. For others, it raises red flags, jealousy, or confusion. Either way, this situation is more common in queer communities than many realize, and it comes with its own unique set of benefits and challenges.

We explore:

• Why lesbians stay friends with their exes. From shared history and pets to overlapping friend groups and chosen family, cutting ties isn’t always simple.

• The emotional benefits of staying close after a breakup, including continued intimacy, reduced isolation, and mutual respect.

• The pitfalls and red flags to watch for, like lingering romantic feelings, blurred sexual boundaries, or guilt-driven friendships.

• How being friends with an ex affects new relationships and what boundaries are needed to protect trust with a current partner.

• Healthy ways to rebuild friendship with an ex once the romance has ended, from taking space first to communicating openly with future partners.

Whether you’re questioning is it a red flag if my lesbian girlfriend is still friends with her ex or wondering how to be friends with your ex as a queer woman, this conversation gives you clarity.

At the heart of it all, friendship with an ex can be healing and affirming, or it can hold you back from moving forward. Knowing the difference and setting boundaries accordingly is what creates safety and space for real love to flourish.

Keywords: lesbian exes who stay best friends, lesbian girlfriend is still friends with her ex, why do lesbians stay friends with their exes, how to be friends with your ex lesbian, lesbian being friends with ex, queer exes friendship, lesbian dating boundaries, being friends with an ex queer

Ways to work with The Luxury Lesbian™ Matchmaker, Sophia Spallino:

💎Platinum Private Luxury Lesbian™ Matchmaking - For the woman who wants her Future Wife® delivered on a silver platter, I do all the screening so you can focus on falling in love.

Explore Private Matchmaking: https://queercountryclub.com/private-lesbian-matchmaking-service

✨Exclusive Luxury Lesbian™ Retreat at Canyon Ranch – A blissful weekend with an intimate group of extraordinary single queer women… curated to spoil your senses and reignite your belief in love and possibility.

Join The Luxury Lesbian™ Getaway: https://queercountryclub.com/luxury-lesbian-retreat

❤️The Queer Country Club® – Our premier dating platform for monogamous queer women who are living amazing lives, but missing just one thing… their Future Partner®.

Apply to Join QCC: https://queercountryclub.com

🌈 Private Rising Coaching Session – If you're unsure of your next step but know in your gut you're ready to call in love, deepen self-trust, or design a life you’re proud of, I’m here to guide you.

Reserve A Private Coaching Session: https://sophiaspallino.com/private-coaching

💬Got Qs? DM on Instagram → @sophiaspallino https://instagram.com/sophiaspallino

🔺Get Wisp Kitty Care 🐱 Proud Partner

https://bit.ly/sophiawisp

In this episode of Queer Women Rising, Sophia Spallino breaks down what the bare minimum really looks like in a woman-loving-woman relationship. From airport pickups with flowers to stocking the fridge with her favorite snacks, Sophia explains why these aren’t grand gestures…they’re the baseline of thoughtful lesbian love. She contrasts this with the low bar women are conditioned to accept from men and reminds queer women to expect more, settle less, and embrace the peaceful, intentional love they deserve.

Ways to work with The Luxury Lesbian™ Matchmaker, Sophia Spallino:

💎Platinum Private Luxury Lesbian™ Matchmaking – For the woman who wants her Future Wife® delivered on a silver platter, I do all the screening so you can focus on falling in love.

Explore Private Matchmaking: https://queercountryclub.com/private-lesbian-matchmaking-service

✨Exclusive Luxury Lesbian™ Retreat at Canyon Ranch - A blissful weekend with an intimate group of extraordinary single queer women… curated to spoil your senses and reignite your belief in love and possibility.

Join The Luxury Lesbian™ trip: https://queercountryclub.com/luxury-lesbian-retreat

❤️The Queer Country Club® – Our premier dating platform for monogamous queer women who are living amazing lives, but missing just one thing… their Future Partner®.

Apply to Join QCC: https://queercountryclub.com

🌈 Private Rising Coaching Session - If you're unsure of your next step but know in your gut you're ready to call in love, deepen self-trust, or design a life you’re proud of, I’m here to guide you.

Reserve A Private Coaching Session: https://queercountryclub.com/private-coaching

💬Got Qs? DM on Instagram → @sophiaspallino https://instagram.com/sophiaspallino

🔺Get Wisp Kitty Care 🐱 Proud Partner

https://bit.ly/sophiawisp

Ever crawled out of a messy breakup and somehow built your dream lesbian life?

Zara Barrie is the critically acclaimed author of Girl, Stop Passing Out in Your Makeup, creator of Girls on Jane, and host of the new dating column Mascara Lesbian.

After surviving deep heartbreak, a toxic relationship, and profound grief—she’s now living a hot, healing, wildly creative lesbian life in West Hollywood.

Listen to GIRLS ON JANE:

Lesbian Fiction | Girls on Jane

a sexy, serialized fiction audio drama (written & narrated by me) about the heartbreak and hedonism of a group of lesbian women living in Manhattan, pre-marriage equality (early-aughts!). I'm also linking out my Substack and GO Mag byline (all lesbian sex and dating) for reference.

Listen/read Mascara Lesbian:

ZARA BARRIE WORDS | Substack

Read her Lesbian Dating and Sex Column:

https://gomag.com/author/zara-barrie/

📲 Connect with my guest, Zara Barrie.
Follow Zara on Instagram: Zara Barrie (@zarabarrie)
Check out her work at: https://www.zarabarrie.com

Ways to work with The Luxury Lesbian™ Matchmaker, Sophia Spallino:

💎Platinum Private Luxury Lesbian™ Matchmaking – For the woman who wants her Future Wife® delivered on a silver platter, I do all the screening so you can focus on falling in love.

Explore Private Matchmaking: https://queercountryclub.com/private-lesbian-matchmaking-service

✨Exclusive Luxury Lesbian™ Retreat at Canyon Ranch – A blissful weekend with an intimate group of extraordinary single queer women… curated to spoil your senses and reignite your belief in love and possibility.

Join The Luxury Lesbian™ trip: https://queercountryclub.com/luxury-lesbian-retreat

❤️The Queer Country Club® – Our premier dating platform for monogamous queer women who are living amazing lives, but missing just one thing… their Future Partner®.

Apply to Join QCC: https://queercountryclub.com

🌈 Private Rising Coaching Session - If you're unsure of your next step but know in your gut you're ready to call in love, deepen self-trust, or design a life you’re proud of, I’m here to guide you.

Reserve A Private Coaching Session: https://queercountryclub.com/private-coaching

💬Got Qs? DM on Instagram → @sophiaspallino https://instagram.com/sophiaspallino

🔺Get Wisp Kitty Care 🐱 Proud Partner

https://bit.ly/sophiawisp

Going through it now? If you ever desire 1:1 coaching with me to work through a breakup, just book a private session with me here: Sophia Spallino | Private Coaching

🏳️‍🌈❤️‍🩹I asked the queer women in my community to share breakup advice given to them by the older, wiser women in their lives. So I am gonna read it to you.

Then I share my best advice.

Lesbian dating and breakups are tough. But you are SOFT enough to feel it, heal it, and move along with your life!

Promise.

Ways I could help you meet your Future Partner:

💎 Platinum Private Lesbian Matchmaking – For the woman who wants her FUTURE WIFE® delivered on a silver platter, I do all the screening so you can focus on falling in love.

Explore Platinum Matchmaking: https://queercountryclub.com/private-lesbian-matchmaking-service

✨ Exclusive Lesbian Luxury Retreat at Canyon Ranch – A blissful weekend with an intimate group of extraordinary single queer women… curated to spoil your senses and reignite your belief in love and possibility.

Apply to join The Luxury Retreat: https://queercountryclub.com/luxe-retreat

❤️ The Queer Country Club® – Our premier dating platform for monogamous queer women who are living amazing lives but missing just one thing… their FUTURE WIFE®.

Apply to Join QCC: https://queercountryclub.com

🌈 Private Rising Coaching Session – If you're unsure of your next step but know in your gut you're ready to call in love, deepen self-trust, or design a life you’re proud of, I’m here to guide you.

Book A Private Coaching Session: https://queercountryclub.com/private-coaching

Got Qs? DM me on Instagram → @sophiaspallino https://instagram.com/sophiaspallino

🔺Get Wisp Kitty Care 🐱 Proud Partner

https://bit.ly/sophiawisp

6 Signs You're Ready to Build a Monogamous Lesbian Relationship

So, how do you know if you're ready for a monogamous lesbian relationship - and not just lonely or burnt out from dating? Here are six clear signs:

1. You're Clear on What You Want, and Communicate It

You’ve stopped saying “I’m open to whatever happens” and started owning what you want: a committed, exclusive relationship. If you're ready to say this on your dating profile and in person, even if it scares some people off, you’re showing true emotional clarity.

2. You’ve Healed from Past Relationships

You don’t view love through the lens of past heartbreak anymore. Sure, you’ve been hurt, but you’ve processed it, reflected on it, and you’re no longer operating out of fear. As a monogamous lesbian, you don’t need to look for someone to “fix” the past - you’re looking to build something new.

3. You’re Comfortable with Emotional Intimacy

Monogamy isn't just about exclusivity; it’s about vulnerability. If you’re comfortable letting someone in emotionally, being seen at your worst, and offering that same safety to a partner, you’re ready for a monogamous bond.

4. You’re Not Distracted by “What Ifs”

You don’t find yourself constantly wondering if the grass is greener. You’re not attached to the idea of endless options or swiping forever. You're looking for depth, not novelty.

5. You’re Ready to Grow with One Person

You understand that even great relationships require effort, compromise, and personal growth. You’re excited to evolve alongside someone rather than bounce from one connection to another.

6. You’re Willing to Prioritize LoveYou’re a clear monogamous lesbian if you are willing to make room in your life for someone else - emotionally, mentally, and logistically. You’re not “too busy” to date; you’re intentionally creating space for partnership.

❤️Meet Your Future Wife inside my LESBIAN DATING CLUB https://queercountryclub.com

☎️Want to be featured on the show? Call in! https://queerwomenrising.com/ask-sophia-spallino

🔺Get Wisp Kitty Care 🐱 Proud Partner

https://bit.ly/sophiawisp

✨Work with me as your COACH

https://SophiaSpallino.com

💬Slide into my DMs

https://www.instagram.com/sophiaspallino

Let’s talk sexology, p*ssy stroking, sexual trauma, pleasure, and making peace with Darshana Avila.

Yes, you might recognize today’s guest is someone you might recognize from Netflix’s Sex, Love & Goop, but that’s just the beginning of her story.

Back in 2015, Darshana Avila was in a marriage and a career that no longer fit. She walked away from both, and now she’s an internationally celebrated speaker and Erotic Wholeness guide helping queer women and AFABs come back home to their bodies and their truth.

Her work is trauma-informed, pleasure-centric, and radically real.

📲 Connect with my guest, Darshana Avila:
Follow Darshana on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/darshana_avila
Check out her website: https://darshanaavila.com
Join her free community: Galgasm!

❤️Meet Your Future Wife where Raina and Laurie met… inside my LESBIAN DATING CLUB

https://queercountryclub.com

💎Learn more and apply to join us on our next Luxury Single Lesbian Retreat

https://queercountryclub.com/luxe-retreat

📲 Follow their love story that Raina shares!
www.Instagram.com/Raina_notfit

🔺Get Wisp Kitty Care 🐱 Proud Partner

Online Sexual and Reproductive Health | Wisp

✨Work with me as your COACH
https://SophiaSpallino.com

💬Slide into my DMs

Instagram (@sophiaspallino)

What if your person is already inside the same dating platform as you… Just waiting for a message?

This week on Queer Women Rising, I’m joined by Raina and Laurie, a couple who found each other through the Queer Country Club®, a platform built for lesbians and queer women looking for intentional, monogamous love.

From first messages to cross-state travel, they share how their relationship unfolded with patience, warmth, and clarity.

Want to meet your Future Wife™ like they did?
Join the Queer Country Club® today!
QueerCountryClub.com

❤️Meet Your Future Wife inside my LESBIAN DATING CLUB

https://queercountryclub.com

☎️Want to be featured on the show? Call in!

https://queerwomenrising.com/ask-sophia-spallino

🔺Get Wisp Kitty Care 🐱 Proud Partner

https://bit.ly/sophiawisp

✨Work with me as your COACH

https://SophiaSpallino.com

💬Slide into my DMs

https://www.instagram.com/sophiaspallino

Don’t try this at home.

Two Lesbians. One carrot.

It was fun until it wasn’t.

Trigger warning: this episode includes my experience with sexual assault.