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CJ Khaled, Prosthetic Stats & Reverse Exorcisms

Welcome to another episode of Pour Choices, where the IQ drops faster than Chris’s Amazon delivery success rate. We kick things off with a very adult discussion about drunken pants-peeing (spoiler: it’s happened), then dive headfirst into the theology of Chris’s fake conversion to Islam — shoutout to our boy CJ Khaled. Meanwhile, David’s asking the real DMV questions: if you’ve got no legs, does your license still say you’re 6’2”? Science.

We spiral into chaos with Harry Potter-themed “Would You Rather,” argue over ideal bottle mouth diameters (yes, really), and debate reverse exorcisms where the demon tells the priest to get out. There's also “Total Spine” (not a Metallica cover band, just Chris’s orthopedist), Mortal Kombat gods, food state rankings, Amazon woes round 12, and a $10M Groundhog Day challenge. Plus: broken toes, NFL stats, NSFW advice no one asked for, and gravestone texts you’ll regret sending.

👉 Hit that like button like it’s a UNO card launcher, subscribe if you're into spinal puns, and comment your Muslim name if you're converting for content too.

Now let’s make POUR CHOICES! And as always, don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT, & SUBSCRIBE!

New Episodes Released Every Wednesday – Don’t Miss Out!

Chapters
00:00 – INTRO
3:10 – YOU’RE ONLY COOL IF YOU PEE YOUR PANTS
4:24 – FORGED BY SEA
7:14 – CHRIS IS CONVERTING TO MUSLIM
10:15 – UNO!
14:15 – YOU MUST BE THIS TALL TO RIDE THIS RIDE
15:59 – WHAT'S THE OPTIMAL DRINK OPENING SIZE?
17:23 – CJ KHALED
18:45 – REVERSE EXORCISM
19:44 – TOTAL SPINE & MORE
22:22 – SHEEVA
23:48 – MOVIES & TV SHOWS
28:35 – TOP 10 STATES WITH THE BEST FOOD
35:10 – HARRY POTTER WOULD YOU RATHER
42:56 – MORE AMAZON WOES
46:53 – CRAZY NFL STATS & FACTS - ROUND 6
50:24 – THE FALL FESTIVAL THAT WASN'T
54:38 – $10,000,000 CHALLENGE
59:59 – THIS WEEK'S POUR CHOICES
1:03:10 – ASK REDDIT - YOUR LAST TEXT IS WHAT WILL BE WRITTEN ON YOUR GRAVESTONE, WHAT DOES IT SAY?
1:07:44 – ASK REDDIT - WHAT'S A NSFW TIP THAT YOU WISH EVERYONE KNEW?
1:10:52 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:11:50 – OUTRO
_________

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Honestly, Does Anyone Like Candy Corn?

In this spooky-season fever dream of an episode, the boys tackle all the hard-hitting Halloween topics — like which traumatic childhood moment still keeps them up at night, which celebrity is shockingly Jewish, and what they'd do if locked in a windowless time prison with a $10 million payout on the line (spoiler: lose track of time around day four and cry into the wall).

We also break down M. Night Shyamalan's cinematic scam of a career (first half: 🔥 / second half: moral lesson no one asked for), play a round of “Boo or Booze” where one of us has to guess whether it’s a horror movie or a cocktail, and Chris gives a heroic retelling of how he shattered his toes like a glass slipper at a frat party. Toss in some haunted trick-or-treat horror stories, another round of “Crazy NFL Stats That No One Asked For But Are Weirdly Impressive,” and an “Ask Reddit” which poses the question: “What’s the worst treat you’ve ever received while trick or treating?” — and boom, you've got yourself the perfect podcast to ignore your responsibilities to.

📌 Smash that like button or don’t, it’s your life. Subscribe if you want more chaotic therapy disguised as a podcast. And comment your worst Halloween candy — unless you say raisins, in which case we’re blocking you.

Now let’s make POUR CHOICES! And as always, don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT, & SUBSCRIBE!

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Chapters
0:00 – INTRO
7:13 – WHAT WAS THE SCARIEST MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE?
9:00 – WHAT’S YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
10:13 – WHAT’S YOUR MOST HAUNTING MISTAKE?
11:33 – WOULD YOU RATHER?
19:04 – LESSER-KNOWN JEWISH PEOPLE
20:28 – MILLION DOLLAR CHALLENGE
28:30 – BOO OR BOOZE?
31:48 – THE PERFECT NEIGHBOR
35:12 – M. NIGHT SYAMALAN
37:49 – BROKEN TOES
47:36 – BLOOD RUNS COLD
49:49 – CRAZY NFL STATS & FACTS – ROUND 5
54:14 – HALLOWEEN HOT TAKES
1:00:56 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
1:02:36 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S THE WORST “TREAT” YOU’VE GOTTEN WHILE TRICK OR TREATING?
1:07:31 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S THE WORST EXPERIENCE YOU’VE HAD ON HALLOWEEN?
1:12:06 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:13:25 – THIS DAY IN HISTORY
1:15:13 – OUTRO
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Million Dollar Challenges, Ant Wars, and Apocalyptic Activities

What do twin babies born during Daylight Saving Time, a $1 million survival challenge, and your dog’s inner monologue all have in common? Absolutely nothing—just like the rest of this episode.

This week, the boys dive headfirst into society’s dumbest debates and come out dumber for it. We kick off with time-traveling twins, cemetery etiquette for your wives, and Would You Rather scenarios that could get you canceled. Then we take on blind ranking nonsense, debate society’s unwritten rules (like “Don’t microwave fish at work, Todd”), and draft things you'd say to your dog that would get you divorced if said to a human.

We also get:

· Insane NFL stats that make you question reality

· Deep thoughts like “Is a hot dog a sandwich?”

· The ultimate million-dollar survival game (spoiler: you’ll die in the Andes)

· A Reverse Family Feud game that makes zero sense

· Strategies for war against ants (Team Cinnamon wins)

· And a what-if apocalypse moment that makes you ask: “Am I really the last one standing… in Ohio?”

Smash that like button, or don’t—we’re not your dad. But if you want to be buried next to us in the YouTube algorithm, hit subscribe. Drop a comment with your hot dog stance or your ant war strategy. We won’t read it, but the algorithm might.

Now let’s make POUR CHOICES! And as always, don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT, & SUBSCRIBE!

New Episodes Released Every Wednesday – Don’t Miss Out!

Chapters
00:00 – INTRO
8:58 – DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TWINS
11:34 – LOVE & MARRIAGE
13:58 – WOULD YOU RATHER?
19:27 – BLIND RANK THESE THINGS
23:17 – UNWRITTEN RULES
27:46 – THINGS YOU WOULD SAY TO YOUR DOG, BUT NOT YOUR WIFE
34:10 – CRAZY NFL STATS & FACTS – ROUND 4
38:07 – DE-PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTIONS
43:52 – MILLION DOLLAR CHALLENGE
52:25 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
55:44 – REVERSE FAMILY FEUD
59:23 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S THE BEST STRATEGY FOR WINNING A WAR AGAINST ANTS?
1:08:12 – ASK REDDIT – EVERYONE ON EARTH DIES RIGHT NOW, WHAT DO YOU DO?
1:12:32 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:15:02 – OUTRO

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Prehistoric Conspiracies, Fiber Fails & Jerry’s Finger

This week on The Pour Choices Show, we start strong with a theory that would make your high school science teacher quit mid-semester — what if the asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs was actually a UFO... and we’re the aliens? Yeah, buckle up, Neil deGrasse Ty-slow.

From there, we spiral into chaos like usual:

• Fiber One missed a marketing slam dunk by not being called Fiber Two.
• DoorDash Duels — imagine every driver having to sword fight before delivering your burger.
• iOS 26 & Apple Glass — because what the world really needs is notifications projected onto your corneas.
• Dark Jokes so bad, even Satan said, “too far, bro.”
• Jerry Jones got fined $250k for flipping off a fan — a small price to pay for the most relatable thing he’s ever done.
• Would You Rather questions that’ll make you question your morals and your friendships.
• If Aliens Landed... what meal are you offering first? (Hint: not gas station sushi.)

We wrap up with NFL stats that sound fake, rapid-fire trivia, and AskReddit confessions that prove humanity peaked somewhere around 2009.

👉 Smash that like button harder than Jerry hit “send,” subscribe so you don’t miss our next existential crisis, and drop a comment telling us what food you’d serve the aliens. (If you say salad, you’re lying.)

Now let’s make POUR CHOICES! And as always, don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT, & SUBSCRIBE!

New Episodes Released Every Wednesday – Don’t Miss Out!

Chapters
00:00 – INTRO
5:18 – PREHISTORIC CONSPIRACY
6:43 – THEY’RE MORE THAN GOOD
9:37 – WHAT IF…?
14:48 – APPLE GLASS
16:58 – DARK JOKES
21:15 – JERRY JONES
22:41 – RAPID FIRE TRIVIA
25:17 – WOULD YOU RATHER?
28:35 – IF ALIENS LANDED…
33:54 – CRAZY NFL STATS & FACTS – ROUND 3
37:59 – THIS WEEK'S POUR CHOICES
40:02 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
41:34 – ASK REDDIT – TELL ME HOW OLD YOU ARE IN ONE SENTENCE
44:24 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT ARE YOU BETTER AT THAN 90% OF PEOPLE?
48:09 – THIS DAY IN HISTORY
50:17 – OUTRO
_________

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Voldemort, Cataracts, and Condiment Controversies

You know it’s going to be a Pour Choices kind of episode when Chris kicks things off by rage-venting about his Toyota dealership trauma like it’s a hostage negotiation. From there, things only get dumber: we ask the hard-hitting questions like can orphans eat at family restaurants, whether weather forecasts are legally binding if the weatherman has cataracts, and if putting mustard on eggs makes you a criminal.

Then it’s time for “Would You Rather?”, where we debate things philosophers fear and therapists charge extra for. There’s also a condiment showdown, blind ranking of accidental inventions (spoiler: LSD doesn’t take the top spot, but it should), and a dramatic reading of David’s basic training letter because nothing screams comedy like military correspondence. Oh, and Voldemort has apparently been cast, so all is not well in the Wizarding World.

We wrap things up by roasting your fridge habits (why are you refrigerating ketchup, psychopath?) and slinging some Reddit-fueled trivia and birthdays at your face. If you don’t come out of this episode dumber and more entertained, you’re probably already both.

👉 Smash that like button like it owes you money, subscribe if you’re too lazy to remember our upload schedule, and drop a comment if you’ve ever clapped with one hand just to prove a point.

Now let’s make POUR CHOICES! And as always, don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT, & SUBSCRIBE!

New Episodes Released Every Wednesday – Don’t Miss Out!

Chapters
00:00 – INTRO
4:17 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
7:07 – TOYOTA TRUCK TROUBLES
12:01 – VOLDEMORT’S BEEN CASTED!?
14:03 – CAN AN ORPHAN EAT AT A FAMILY RESTAURANT?
16:36 – IF A WEATHERMAN HAS CATARACTS, ARE ALL OF HIS FORECASTS “PARTLY CLOUDY”?
19:29 – WOULD YOU RATHER?
27:04 – WHAT’S THE BEST CONDIMENT?
27:55 – DARK JOKES & DAD JOKES
32:37 – CRAZY NFL STATS & FACTS – ROUND 2
35:52 – BLIND RANK – ACCIDENTAL INVENTIONS
38:52 – BASIC TRAINING LETTERS
44:53 – HAPPY CHRISTMAS, HARRY
46:34 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT GROCERY ITEMS DON’T NEED TO BE REFRIGERATED, BUT PEOPLE REFRIGERATE THEM ANYWAY?
52:15 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S THE MOST INTERESTING FACT YOU KNOW?
56:10 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
57:11 – OUTRO
_________

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Turn the Air Down, Flush the Truth Away

This episode is like watching two drunk uncles argue in a Buffalo Wild Wings, except instead of wings you get 11 hours of Chris waiting for a car dealership to remember he exists. From there we spiral into life’s biggest mysteries: why we wash towels that only ever touch our allegedly clean bodies, why “boxing rings” are basically just angry squares, and how the hell a triple amputee claps (spoiler: it’s dark, don’t ask).

We also put David’s brain through hell with fake horror movie titles (turns out Killer Sofa is real, and somehow scored higher than Disney’s new dumpster fire Snow White), decode food logos like it’s a Dan Brown novel for fat kids, and debate NFL stats so insane they sound like Mad Libs. Sprinkle in some urban legends, ask Reddit questions that guarantee you’ll fail a sobriety test if you say them to a cop, and a shocking plot twist where David steals Chris’s Tito’s + La Croix drink like a budget TikTok influencer. Oh yeah, we even celebrate celebrity birthdays, because apparently you people need closure.

Smash subscribe if you hate yourself just enough to come back next week. Drop a comment about your worst pickup line, or just type “Perma-Plate” so Chris knows his suffering wasn’t for nothing. Or don’t. We’ll just assume you’re off clapping with your phantom limbs.

Now let’s make POUR CHOICES! And as always, don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT, & SUBSCRIBE!

New Episodes Released Every Wednesday – Don’t Miss Out!

Chapters
00:00 – INTRO
1:29 – PERMA-DUMB
5:34 – WHY DO WE WASH BATH TOWELS?
9:44 – WHY ARE BOXING RINGS SQUARE?
11:00 – GIVE IT UP FOR TRIPLE AMPUTEES
12:57 – REAL OR FAKE – HORROR MOVIES
18:54 – HIDDEN MEANINGS IN FOOD LOGOS
26:52 – URBAN LEGENDS
31:56 – INSANE NFL STATS & FACTS
35:28 – SNOW WHITE
36:35 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
38:06 – NATIONAL DAYS
39:01 – ASK REDDIT – YOU GET PULLED OVER BY A COP, WHAT DON’T YOU SAY?
42:18 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S AN ACRONYM MANY PEOPLE KNOW OF BUT DON’T KNOW WHAT IT STANDS FOR?
47:50 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
50:31 – OUTRO
_________

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R.I.P. Charlie Kirk

This episode is basically a fever dream wrapped in a podcast. We start with the tragic passing of Charlie Kirk before diving into immortality that sounds more like a punishment, limb-swapping for potato tubes, and sitcom catchphrases that’ll guarantee nobody ever invites you to Thanksgiving again.

Strap in. There’s no moral lesson. Just vibes, carnage, and whatever the hell David’s daughter keeps ordering on Amazon.

Death, Taxes, & …Immortality?

• What if your body aged but you couldn’t die? It’s called fatherhood, and it sucks.
• If you had to replace a limb with a random object. Chris chooses potatoes... just potatoes.
• Red flags, and invisibility fantasies—because therapy is expensive.
• Real or Fake Last Words: Some were famous. Some were fabricated. All of them are stupid.

The G.O.A.T.s of Fall & …Everything Else

• Blind Ranking “Fall Things” with no context, no prep, and no logic.
• “The Best & The Worst” lets David pass judgment like he’s Yelp for the universe.

Letters, Love & Professional Wrestlers

• David reads another gem from his Basic Training letters—this one’s from dear old dad, probably full of life advice and veiled disappointment.
• Chris learns Glacier (yes, the WCW one) is marrying David’s wife’s best friend, which means this wedding will either be legendary… or involve a steel chair.
• Pick-up lines so bad they might be war crimes, followed by brutal rejections that restore your faith in women everywhere.
• Happy birthday to celebrities we pretend to care about for 12 seconds.

Unholy Ask Reddit Chaos

• What food combo makes everyone question your sanity? (Spoiler: pickles and peanut butter are not okay.)
• What oddly specific type of person do you attract? Apparently “people who’ve definitely cried during Fast & Furious 7.”

If you make it through this chaos without unsubscribing, congrats—you’re officially part of the problem. Smash that like button, subscribe so you can regret it later, and drop a comment telling us which limb you’d replace with a traffic cone. Or don’t. Honestly, we’ll just assume you’re dead.

Now let’s make POUR CHOICES! And as always, don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT, & SUBSCRIBE!

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Chapters
00:00 – INTRO
4:12 – R.I.P. CHARLIE KIRK
10:12 – WHAT IF YOU COULD NEVER *** BUT YOUR BODY AGED NORMALLY?
12:16 – REPLACING LIMBS WITH OBJECTS
14:53 – IF YOU WERE A SITCOM CHARACTER, WHAT WOULD YOUR CATCHPHRASE BE?
15:41 – WHAT’S YOUR BIGGEST RED FLAG?
17:02 – IF YOU COULD BE INVISIBLE FOR 24 HOURS, WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
19:10 – REAL OR FAKE – LAST WORDS?
27:18 – GLACIER’S GETTING MARRIED
29:25 – PICK-UP LINES & REJECTIONS
32:35 – BASIC TRAINING LETTERS
36:41 – BLIND RANK FALL THINGS
41:55 – DISASTROUS MARYLAND TRIPS
44:45 – THE BEST & THE WORST
56:57 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
59:43 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S A FOOD COMBO YOU SWEAR BY THAT MAKES EVERYONE ELSE QUESTION YOUR SANITY?
1:06:52 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT ODDLY SPECIFIC TYPE OF MEN OR WOMAN DO YOU SEEM TO ATTRACT?
1:11:02 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:13:42 – OUTRO

_________

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And On The 4th Day…

What do you get when you mix peanut allergies, blind-ranking assassinations, and a spontaneous TED Talk on relativity? An episode of Pour Choices that goes from biblical confusion to dad-core drafts in under 60 minutes. This one has it all: unsolicited parenting overlap, bald man identity crises, and a terrifying new idea—what if every time you ate, something somewhere was just… yeeted?

Let’s unpack this existential casserole:

🐺 Dads, Drafts & Deep Thoughts

- A heated debate about whether people with peanut allergies should attend games that sell… peanuts.
- Did the “Wolf’s” or the “Wolves” arrive. Spoiler: both are grammatically wrong somehow.
- A long-overdue draft finally drops: “Things That Dads Love” — featuring thermostats, yelling at traffic, and steaks that are definitely overcooked but still “perfect.”

☀️ Existential Confusion & Religious Logistics
- If God made the sun on Day 4… what was powering Days 1–3?
- If you’re hairless, what hair color do they put on your license? “See ID” isn’t an answer.
- Hawaiian hurricanes having Hawaiian names: beautiful tradition, or low-key disrespectful?

💀 Death, Torture, and Questionable Ethics
- What’s your preferred method of torture?” is asked with zero hesitation and even less context.
- “Blind Ranking: Assassinations” somehow gets both historical and problematic.
- David’s 1-year-old keeps ordering increasingly expensive items on Amazon. It's adorable until it isn’t.

🥃 Pour Decisions & Closing Chaos
- This week’s Pour Choices – because Chris still hasn’t found his testicles
- “What’s the greatest YouTube video of all time?” (Spoiler: it’s Taylor Swift with goats screaming)
- Celebrity birthdays get celebrated. Or mocked. Usually both.
- Ask Reddit delivers gold with:
“Who’s the GOAT in their field and why?”

“What’s the best idea you’ve ever had?”

Now let’s make POUR CHOICES! And as always, don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT, & SUBSCRIBE!

New Episodes Released Every Wednesday – Don’t Miss Out!

Chapters
00:00 – INTRO
5:03 – ALLERGIC TO PEANUTS
6:41 – THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE TURKEY!
9:33 – AND ON THE 4TH DAY…
12:06 – WOLF’S VS WOLVES
12:59 – WE’RE BALDING
14:06 – DOES SOAP EXPIRE?
16:50 – CHRIS’S CORNER
17:43 – AN ITALIAN HELLO
21:03 – A NEW ZOE(Y) IN TOWN
27:30 – AMAZON SHOPPING SPREE
29:58 – BLIND RANKING ASSASSINATIONS
33:19 – WOULD YOU RATHER?
39:29 – SOCIAL MEDIA PRESENCE
42:05 – WHAT’S YOUR PREFERRED METHOD?
49:10 – THE G.O.A.T.
50:28 – TOP 5 GREATEST ACHEIVEMENTS
52:48 – THEORY OF RELATIVITY
55:34 – HAWAIIN HURRICANES
58:09 – THINGS THAT DADS LOVE DRAFT
1:15:04 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
1:16:49 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:21:17 – ASK REDDIT – WHO WAS THE G.O.A.T. IN THEIR FIELD & WHY?
1:27:50– GREATEST YOUTUBE CLIP OF ALL TIME
1:28:45 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S THE GREATEST IDEA YOU’VE EVER HAD?
1:38:27 – OUTRO

_________

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