“When people think about diversity & inclusion, they don’t often think about sex workers but they’re some of the most marginalised people globally in different communities so it feels natural to consider them.”

Alex Feis-Bryce (he/him) is an award-winning third sector leader, campaigner and policy adviser with a track record of driving social change and services to support some of the most marginalised and oppressed people in society.

He’s the CEO of Diversity Role Models, a charity that delivers anti-bullying & diversity training in schools to students, staff & governors as well as parents & careers. His incredible career spans working as a political advisor, co-founding sex- worker safety charity National Ugly Mugs and working internationally advising organisations supporting sex workers and LGBTQ+ people.

Alex describes himself as a “weird little kid”who was rather eccentric & chose to wear big glasses! He even created his own history museum in the garden shed. This was stifled during his teenage years which he found frightening but it’s something he lent into more during the freedom of sixth form colleague and today. Throwing himself into football as a way of fitting-in has resulted in a love of the sport which brings him peace & joy.

Alex’s work has also been hugely shaped by his personal experiences. On his first night out in Manchester after starting university, Alex was raped & during this conversation, he shares how he dealt with this in his own way, the positive responses he’s received from talking about his experience and how this led to his roles with Survivors UK and We Are Survivors.

Contrary to how many other CEOs are perceived, Alex shared how he veers towards being conflict avoidant in work & relationships where he tends to focus on meeting the needs of others. A trait says a lot about the way Alex shows up in the world, his values & compassion.

We talk about his early political career & the MP who had a huge influence on him, a mutual love of the book ‘The Dice Man’ by Luke Reinhart & the importance of Diversity Role Models for young people today. Their work is under threat due to pulled government funding. Their crowdfunding campaign, with a target of £100k, is crucial in ensuring they can continue their anti-bullying workshops in schools & collegues. So if you can donate, it would be hugely appreciated and you can do so here: https://www.iglyo.org/opportunities/drm-fundraiser-2025.

His contribution was recognised earlier this year when he was named in the Pride Power List which celebrates the 100 most “powerful, dedicated and wonderful people within the LGBTQIA community who do everything in their power to make LGBTQIA life that little bit brighter.” You’ll hear why during this episode.

PLEASE NOTE: This episode contains conversations about sexual abuse & rape so please take care of yourself whilst listening.

“I feel like I can make wins. I can win in the classroom & I can win in my school but it feels like I can win more for LGBT+ people & Trans people & Trans students as well as educators.”

Kacey DeGroot (she/her), my first guest for season 4 of ‘Pause… And Rewind…’, is a drama teacher and trade unionist on a mission. She’s currently campaigning to be elected as the Deputy General Secretary of the National Education Union (NEU), the largest education union in Europe, representing teachers, lecturers, support staff, and school leaders in the UK's maintained and independent schools and colleges. Having been involved for many years within the NEU’s LGBTQ+ committee, she’s ready to step up. Which has come at a crucial time with schools feeling the impact of the Supreme Court Ruling & EHRC guidance on gender & bathrooms.

Kacey began teaching in 2005 and when she transitioned in 2018, it was the support of union members that got her through. She made a video for her whole school & she was able to thrive in her role as a teacher. Fast forward to today’s landscape for Trans+ folk and things are much more challenging - something Kacey has felt the brunt of. But she is feeling the spirit of fight & resistance within herself & the community.

We talk about Little Kacey being a ‘daydreamer’ & an ‘oddbod’ with a desperate desire to fit in. We also chat about the influence of her dad as a market trader on her theatrical flair along with the realisation of her ADHD & transness, her career journey from door to door sales to performing and becoming a teacher which she loves.

Kacey is at an exciting crossroads in her life. Listen in to this conversation and please do show your support for Kacey however you can. If you’re a teacher & part of the NEU, please consider voting for Kacey. If you know a teacher, share Kacey’s story with them. Kacey is a voice for change - she’s got the experience, she’s done the work and we need more Trans+ people in positions like the one she’s campaigning for. Read more about Kacey’s campaign here | https://www.kaceydegroot.org/deputy-general-secretary

PLEASE NOTE | We do cover some challenging topics during this conversation around mental health, suicide & the current landscape for the Trans+ community. Please take care of yourself whilst listening.

“I’ve experienced things I never thought I’d experience. I’ve experienced freedom I never thought I would have. I didn’t even know it existed.”

This a powerful reflection around sobriety from this week’s guest on ‘Pause. And Rewind…’ that I really relate to. Harry Gay (he/him) - YES, that’s his real name and there’s a brilliant story about it in this episode - is a DJ, event producer & activist. He’s the Founder & Co-Director of London-based DJ collection Queer House Party which started as online venture during lockdown fronted by a crew of frontline workers who threw their DJ equipment together & went with it. It’s since become a mainstay of nightlife in the capital - bold, political, unapologetic.

Harry brings a shit ton of creativity, skill & energy to his DJing & reflects on the journey as DJ & Queer House Party, what it stands for and how it’s evolved organically.

Little Harry grew up in Hertfordshire in a working class, single parent household and we chat about his constantly being in trouble at school, family dynamics & feeling out of place. His experience of ADHD, and a later diagnosis, have helped him make sense of much of this and he goes on to describe how going sober has also become a part of that. Which is particularly timely given he’s just celebrated his third soberversary.

Despite struggling with education, Harry went on to become top of his class at university and his studies, as well as settling into London life, informed much of his work around activism, advocacy & campaigning on a variety of issues including supporting asylum seekers, homelessness & youth advocacy.

When asked what he’s proud of, Harry reflects on his 15 year old self sneaking out to G-A-Y bar in Soho where he started to find community, belonging & an interest in politics. He also fondly reflects on the angry energy he had in his 20s. These days, despite being in nightlife and living the freelance life, he enjoys calmness. And the three words Harry uses to describe his origin story - Kicking-Off. Chaos. Serenity - really capture him & his origin story.

“Trust yourself. No-one knows what they’re doing. It’s a realisation I had far too late”. He’s not just one of my favourite DJs out there. Harry is someone I’ve personally learned a lot from & I’m so grateful for this conversation as I close out season 3. Enjoy!

“I don’t care if it’s just one person at a time. Because one person talks to one person talks to one person. That’s how you win.”

LGBTQ+ inclusion and rugby in the topic here as this week’s guest on ‘Pause. And Rewind…’ shares their efforts in founding & becoming the Chair of the World's First LGBTQIA+ supporters' association in World Professional Rugby, QuinsPride at Harlequins. It’s impressive - and so is Emily Hamilton (she/her).

Emily is Deputy CEO of Trans in the City and a FTSE 100 Vice President with a 25 year career in Strategic Change and Transformation. She’s a global speaker on Trans+ inclusion, mental health & business effectiveness. She sits on advisory panels for the Police and CPS in the cause of eradicating LGBTQ+ Hate Crime and Violence against Women and Girls. She’s award winning - rightly so - and she’s using her passion, expertise & skills to improve the lives of trans+ individuals in the workplace & beyond.

Little Emily grew in West London and knew she was different. She had a fascination with jewelry & wanted to be Madonna. During an appointment with a child psychologist in an early attempt to come out. “I’m a girl”, she shared. She knew she’d said something wrong from the response leading to conversion therapy.

Masking, self preservation & shame are all part of Emily’s story. And whilst she reflects fondly of her career in the military, like other guests, there was the constant fear of ‘the knock on the door’. Emily’s advocacy for mental health means she openly shares her multiple experiences of attempting suicide & the life-saving call from a dear friend being the reason she is still her today.

And she’s proud to still be here. “If you’re not here, you can’t do any more good, can you?”. I know I speak for so many people when I say I’m truly glad Emily is still here.

The words Emily uses to describe her origin story are ‘Stubbon. Tenacity. Frightened.’ All of which shape Emily, her purpose & her lived experience as a bisexual, Trans woman. And whilst the current landscape for the Trans+ community is frightening and has taken her back to a darker space over the last 6 - 9 months, Emily sees hope - more organisation & urgency, a greater sense of community & egos dropping away as we come together.

She believes change is possible. The army taught her that “if the political will is there you can change rapidly”. We talk through her career shift from the army to business as well as self-care & kindness, accountability & forgiveness, the cost of visibility, Emily’s pride in her wonderful daughter & not waiting for permission to ‘do the thing’.

Please note | We cover some challenging topics in this episode, specifically around mental health & suicide so please take care of yourself whilst listening.

“It’s all about changing hearts & minds. That’s kind of me all over really.”

With a career in PR working across small & large agencies through to founding TransMission PR - lovingly described as her third child - for Aby Hawker (she/her), it’s truly a mission driven by love, values & an incredibly clear stance on what it’s all about. That being to flip the narrative and prioritise uplifting Trans+ representation & stories across the board.

Aby is the first LGBTQ+ ally I’ve had on ‘Pause. And Rewind…’ and we talk about her journey to the space she’s in now as a cisgender, straight woman from taking on comms in Trans+ healthcare for Gender GP over a decade ago through to founding a Trans+ focused PR agency that centres collaboration, lived experience & expertise and positive change for the community. I was curious as to how much of Aby’s origin story has influenced the Aby we know & love today…

Little Aby was a self-labelled “total swot” who wasn’t easily deterred from her goals. She reflects on how this was driven by a need to please, potentially as a result from coming from a divorced background, but how it’s got her to where she needed to be. Being born in Italy & spending time there throughout her life meant that Aby completed a degree in languages which sparked the revelation “now I know what I don’t want to do”.

Aby’s determination, clarity around who she is & a firm belief in what’s right & wrong clearly shows up in her work now. An eternal optimism, tenacity & learning to be a bit braver are fundamental to her story and the three words she uses to describe herself & her origin story ‘Run Towards It’ couldn’t be more fitting.

We chat about career failures, take-aways for anyone wanting to go into PR, parenting, success & happiness and some solid advice including ‘don’t be a dick’. Enjoy!

If your organisation would like to work with TransMission PR, get in touch | https://transmissionpr.com/

Oh and go stream ‘First Day’ on YouTube - available to watch now | https://www.youtube.com/@firstdaytvseries

“To blend is not something I want to do.”

And this certainly shows with this week’s guest on ‘Pause. And Rewind…’. Whether it’s through their creative outlets, owning their queerness as a superpower or busting out nail polish that matches the front cover of their debut book, Andrew Flewitt (he/him) is passionate, unapologetic & ambitious. He’s the host & producer of the podcast ‘Queer I Am’, now approaching its sixth season, public speaker and now author.

In our conversation, Andrew reflects on his twenties as a period where he did blend having followed a fairly heteronormative approach to life - something he didn’t realise at the time but that he’s definitely not following now!

Andrew’s life has been massively shaped by loss. It’s the centre of his newly published book ‘Do You Believe in Life After Loss: Queer Stories of Loss, Hope & Resilience’. It’s a topic the book, & this conversation, dives into. Through interviews with those featured in the book as well as his own experiences, Andrew is changing the way we look at & talk about loss because essentially, as he states, “we all lose”.

From the death of one of his best friends at 26 and his father several years ago through to the breakdown of his relationship, & subsequent reconciliation, with his partner Theo, Andrew shares it all. He also reflects on the importance of walking from toxic family dynamics - an experience that resonates deeply with me - and how this is often best for everyone.

We discuss how Little Andrew LOVED Tina Turner & was a bit of a dreamer as well as his early working life as a hotel receptionist & the insurance industry before establishing a career in HR. Having chased success, he admits it’s a role he enjoys - that’s ultimately led him to where & who he is now - but it’s his creativity that’s his true passion. Pursuing that came later in life with a growing confidence & life experience.

“I love a lot. I love hard.” This is also pretty clear when you get to Andrew so listen in & enjoy… Oh & go grab a copy of his new book from your local queer independent retailer & download ‘Queer I Am’.

“It's exhausting existing authentically in a world that claims to value authenticity. But at every turn of that authenticity being revealed asks it to politely put itself in the box that it was given.”

This conversation is PACKED with deep reflection & wise wise wise words of wisdom from Darkwah (they/them), this week’s guest for ‘Pause. And Rewind…’

Darkwah is a multi-disciplinary artist, content creator, activist & visionary with a passion for beauty, self-expression & community. We explore where all of these things stem from including Little Darkwah’s upbringing, breaking away from tradition & not ever feeling safe to give all of themself to those around them; through to a moment looking in the mirror whilst residing at a YMCA where they decided to stop running away.

The conversation gets fired up from the start with Darkwah expressing their rage at companies pulling back on their support for Pride & the LGBTQ+ community. It’s a rage born out of love for humanity. Love is a common theme during this episode. We explore Darkwah’s journey into polyamory, its complexities, lessons & joy. Darkwah shares how their partner Dom has shown them how to love themself and given them space to “be still, reflect a little more & be softer to the touch.”

Together they’ve got a new venture coming up called ‘Grow Your Glow’ in collaboration with Blossom LGBT+ which they’re super excited about!

Our chat also covers putting the term ‘maybe’ in the bin, the importance of finding your ‘why’ when thinking about inclusion, what’s on the menu when cooking for friends & an enthusiastic outburst for Britney Jean Spears. As always, Darkwah SHOWS UP in this episode… ENJOY!

Please note | We cover some challenging topics in this episode, specifically around mental health & suicidal thoughts so please take care of yourself whilst listening.

“It’s all just a happy accident.”

I love the above sentiment from this week’s guest on ‘Pause. And Rewind…” when talking about their career. I also bloody love them - and it’s a hard relate too!

George Lester, or That Girl, is an author & drag queen. I first met them in early 2023 during the protests against drag queen storytime that were taking place at the Honor Oak pub in Southeast London. The local community came out in force to protect both the drag performers & the pub and stand-up against the bigots. That Girl became the ‘very pretty’ face & voice of the counter protests. We reflect on our experiences of this which led to their incredible one person show ‘That Girl vs The World’ which tells the story of their drag career & the protests.

To reiterate the opening line, this was accidental - That Girl was simply filling in for a friend yet this boosted their profile. They’re now one of London’s firm favourite drag queens. Booked & blessed as they say. Not just because of this… they’re also insanely talented!

Little George describes himself as a ‘creative little monster’ always putting on shows for adults. Though when not performing, don’t perceive him! It’s a contradiction & balancing act he thrives in. His creativity extends to writing and George is now a published author with two books out in the world - ‘Boy Queen’ & ‘Don’t Die Alone Lucas Cook’ - both of which are a dream come true. He recalls reaching out to publishers when he was just 12 years old & still has physical rejection letters.

“So many rejections. So many near misses. So many ‘no’s’.” George strives to find the good in these instances. Taking philosophy from Rachel Green from Friends of all places, he jokes, he believes things work out because ‘they have to’.

We talk about George’s publishing career & writing experience, the phone call telling him he’d been accepted into drama school and his journey into drag - which he describes as one of the greatest joys of his life. When talking about performing, he shares “I'm like looking out at a sea of faces who are all smiling & screaming this song back at me, and it's like, Oh, this feels like Wembley Stadium. But it's not. It's a little bar in Soho, and I feel like I'm on a cloud like it's just pure joy.”

Listen in for a truly gorgeous chat. Grab yourself a copy of George’s books. And get yourself to a bar to see That Girl perform. You’re in for a treat!