Following on from part 1, fan favourite Jo Matthews joins Mark once more for another laughter-filled, cathartic rant through the most mind-bogglingly ill-informed things people have said about raising autistic, ADHD, PDA and otherwise neurodivergent kids.

This one features a fresh batch of well-meaning nonsense, unsolicited advice, and flat-out offensive comments submitted by Neuroshambles listeners. It’s funny, familiar, and frighteningly relatable.

⸻

CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):

00:00 - Intro & Meet the Guest: Jo Matthews Returns

05:30 - "Have you tried a routine?"

10:30 - "Have you tried a parenting course?"

13:30 - “Have you tried changing their diet?”

17:00 - "Why don't you take their screens away?"

20:00 - "Does he have mild autism?"

25:30 - Good autism v bad autism

29:00 - “We’re all a bit autistic"

34:30 - "ADHD is just an excuse"

37:00 - “It doesn't define him”

41:00 - "There's nothing wrong with him"

43:00 - Medical v Social models of disability

47:30 - "My kid does that"

50:00 - “He'll eat when he's hungry"

52:30 - “He'll grow out of it"

54:30 - “He doesn't look autistic"

56:30 - “But, he can talk, so he can’t be autistic”

59:00 - “ADHD is just for boys”

1:01:30 - "What's wrong with him?"

1:02:30 - "I bet he's good at maths"

1:04:30 - "I don't know how you do it"

1:07:00 - Misguided empathy: "I know how you feel"

1:09:00 - "But I do that and I'm not autistic"

1:14:00 - The completely batshit mental comments

1:20:00 - Neurodiversity Champions

1:21:30 - Tiny Epic Wins

1:25:00 - "What the flip?" moments

1:27:30 - Wrap-up & contact info

⸻

LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:

• The medical vs social models of disability: www.scope.org.uk/about-us/social-model-of-disability/

• Autism assessments (AQ Test): www.embrace-autism.com/aq-10/#test

• Bowles Outdoor Centre - www.bowles.rocks

⸻

CONTACT US

📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com

📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles

🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod

📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles

🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

⸻

CREDITS

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: https://pixabay.com

In this episode, Mark is joined once again by the brilliant Jo Matthews for a cathartic, hilarious, and occasionally sweary dive into the unfiltered reality of parenting autistic, ADHD and PDA kids.

From "It's just a label" and "He’s fine with me" to "You just need to push them out of their comfort zone", this is part one of a two-part special on the unsolicited commentary we all get, whether it’s from strangers, family members, or well-meaning-but-utterly-wrong professionals. The kind of comments that pretend to be supportive but are really just dismissive, ignorant, or unhelpfully optimistic.

Together, Mark and Jo share personal stories, listener submissions, and a few moments of pure rage-laughter, as they unpack why these statements cut so deep – and how to push back with humour, honesty, and the occasional incredulous raise of the eyebrow.

⸻

CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated): 00:00 – Intro & Meet the Guest: Jo Matthews 06:00 – “It's just a label” 08:00 - The story of Rube Waddell 16:00 - "Stop Mollycoddling your child" 21:00 - "You let them win too much" 22:30 - "Can't you just make them do it?" 26:00 - "You should make their home life more unpleasant" 28:00 - "Your parenting is wishy washy" 31:00 - "Children just need boundaries" 36:00 - "You need to push them out of their comfort zone" 43:00 - "Are you too afraid to say no?" 48:00 - "How will they manage in the real world?" 52:00 - "Sometimes, it's a choice" 54:00 - "They're just trying to get their own way" 01:02:00 - "They're fine when they're with me" 01:07:00 - The Positives 01:09:30 - Neurodiversity Champions 01:12:00 - Tiny Epic Wins 01:14:30 - What the Flip? 01:17:00 - Wrap-Up & What’s Coming in Part Two

⸻

LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:

• Rube Waddell - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rube_Waddell
• "Am I raising an arsehole?" episode of Neuroshambles -https://pod.link/1710455546/episode/a313c1057becbcd2e24d64c5bf94820e
• "The Explosive Child" book - https://drrossgreene.com/the-explosive-child.htm

⸻

CONTACT US

📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com 📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles 🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod 📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles 🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

⸻

CREDITS

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: https://pixabay.com

In this episode, Mark takes a typically sideways look at the idea of hobbies – those wholesome after-school activities that see neurotypical kids flourish… but which, for many neurodivergent families, are either a logistical nightmare, a sensory minefield, or a fast track to public meltdown.

Joining him is the brilliant Nicole Bateman – podcast host (Conversations with a SEND Mum), former teacher, trainer, and founder of The Friendly SEND Advisor and Super Sensory Squad. Together, they explore the myths, pressures and downright ridiculousness of what “having hobbies” means when your kids are autistic, ADHD or PDA.

They cover what actually works, what definitely doesn’t, and the benefits of learning to follow your neurodifferent child's lead, so you can meet them where they're at, rather than where you want them to be.

00:00 – Intro & Meet the Guest: Nicole Bateman 03:00 – The fantasy of hobbies vs the reality 08:00 – Issues with trust and accessibility 13:00 – After-school clubs 18:00 – The Summer holiday hobby void 25:00 – Trying to force your neurodivergent children to have a hobby 33:00 – Social disconnect in group settings 39:00 – When your best intentions fail 44:00 - Environmental barriers to adopting a hobby 47:00 – Competitive Sport: Gift or Curse? 53:00 – Caesar-or-Nothing syndrome & hobby avoidance 59:00 – Drop-off disasters 1:07:00 – What *does* work? 1:12:00 – It's not all rubbish: A look at the positives 1:15:00 – Neurodiversity Champions 1:23:00 – Tiny Epic Wins 1:26:00 – What the Flip? Moments 1:29:00 – Wrap-Up & Where to Find Nicole

• Nicole Bateman’s Website – Friendly SEND Advisor and Super Sensory Squad: https://nicolebateman.co.uk/
• Conversations with a SEND Mum – Nicole’s podcast: https://conversationswithasendmum.buzzsprout.com/
• Super Sensory Squad Book – ‘Buzz’s Birthday’ and other penguin-based sensory tools: https://www.thesupersensorysquad.com/
• Cub Scouts: https://www.scouts.org.uk/cubs/being-a-cub/joining-cubs/
• Lisa Lloyd reel - Neurotypicals watching what their parents watch: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DIzCFBxNzxT
• “Why Can’t I Just Enjoy Things?” by Pierre Novellie – Caesar-or-nothing brains and comedy insight: https://amzn.eu/d/dSZA4dC
• Minecraft Club - Online Social Group for 7-14 year olds: https://minecraftclub.co.uk/
• Press Play - Stop frame animation workshops in Sussex: https://pressplayfilms.co.uk/
• Boogie Beat - Music and movement classes: https://boogiebeat.co.uk/
• Sam Mills – Disability Tennis Brighton: Email smsportsolutions@gmail.com for information

📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com

📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles

🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod

📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles

🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: https://pixabay.com