For twelve years, Mike Tenney carried other people's worst days as a law enforcement officer. Then his own arrived — first in a patrol car with a gun to his head, then three years later in a closet with a plan to end his life. In this conversation, Mike shares the voice that stopped him, the wife who took the wrong exit, and the long walk back to the man he was always meant to be.

About the Guest

Mike Tenney is a former law enforcement officer, medically retired with PTSD and major depression after twelve years on the job. He lives in Hawaii with his wife and family, where he is a soon-to-be grandfather and helps small businesses understand their financial potential. This is the first time Mike has publicly told this story.

Chapters

0:00 Introduction - A Moment That Changes Everything

2:21 The Train Accident - October 15, 2015

3:05 Arriving First on Scene

6:54 The Breaking Point - Gun to His Head

9:14 The Voice That Saved His Life

10:15 Medically Retired - Identity in Crisis

12:20 The Red Flags He Missed

13:05 Skipping the Debriefs - How It All Piled Up

15:40 Hidden Addictions as Coping Mechanisms

16:59 Anger, Shame, and the Weight of It All

18:18 Psychache - When Everything Collapses

19:38 December 8, 2018 - The Second Crisis

21:34 Locked Out of His Own Safe

24:59 God Told Me To - Wife Saves His Life on the Freeway

28:44 Hope Returns - A Dream and a New Beginning

31:09 What He Was Hiding from His Wife

33:45 Why We Hide Our Hearts - The Fear of Vulnerability

36:37 The Shocking Truth About First Responder Suicide

45:15 You Are Not Alone - Message to Those Still Struggling

49:10 Being a Cop Is Not Who I Was, It's What I Did

50:26 Choosing a Life Around What Matters

51:34 Be There - The Whole Point of the Podcast

52:22 Gratitude and Closing Thoughts

52:56 Mike Calls Alan an Earth Angel

53:32 Final Message - You Are Not Alone, You Are Loved

54:53 Exalt - A Brotherhood for High Performers

Resources Mentioned

• West Coast Post-trauma Retreat (WCPR) — frsn.org/west-coast-post-trauma-retreat.html
• Warrior Heart — warriorsheart.com
• Wild at Heart by John Eldredge — Mike's #1 book
• The Shack by Wm. Paul Young
• Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl

If You or Someone You Love is Struggling

988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline — call or text 988 in the US, or visit 988lifeline.org.