John reveals the only thing more exhausting than a four-month-old baby is 2024 road comedy and a rooster delaying his flight in Key West.

The boys then solve every marital problem with “home-bed advantage,” argue over whether Travelodges or five-star hotels are hornier, agree the UK is the most body-positive country on earth because half the population look like “boulders wearing a mask,” and somehow end up ranking the sexual prowess of world leaders: Elizabeth Warren’s Navajo bean-sprout foreplay, Nigel Farage throwing a mean piece, Liz Truss’s autistic hyper-sexuality, and yes… even MBS gets a reluctant “he can get it.”

Other topics include:

• When it’s acceptable to start heroin (post-kids for John, tomorrow for Larry)
• Why Nancy Reagan was the blowjob queen of Hollywood
• The Riyadh Comedy Festival = dirty money, but at least Jimmy Carr would admit he just likes cash
• Grindr in Grimsby vs. Glasgow: too many blank profiles and men who’ve been smoking since age six
• And the eternal question: if gay sex is illegal in Saudi Arabia, it must be absolutely mind-blowing

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 11 goes completely off the rails as Larry reveals his master plan for a goat farm staffed exclusively by free-range twinks (who he refuses to speak to), John explains why six hours of drag makeup only made him look like an undercover gay-basher, and the boys discover they’re both unf*ggable straight legends despite every possible opportunity.

From Drag Race turning sassy into just plain mean, male strip clubs being infinitely better than female ones, why gays + Jews = instant gentrification, the real reason to pick Huntsville over Birmingham, Alabama, and the correct noise a vagina should make on entry, to OnlyFans etiquette, high-school crush revenge-banging by the river, and why you should never ever pay for porn when it’ll be pirated in nine months anyway.

It’s an hour of the most depraved, hilarious, unfiltered comedy-podcast chaos you’ll hear all week. Strap in (or clean out, depending on your plans).IT IS NOT AN HOUR

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Two stand‑up comics who “love” comedy… except for when they absolutely hate it.

In Episode #9, John Hastings and Larry Dean spiral through:

• Why every good comic secretly resents comedy at least some of the time
• The pain of bombing with your favourite bits while the “easy” jokes kill
• Audiences happily giving notes to comics they’ve never seen… but not to doctors
• AIDS as a joke topic, “as funny as AIDS” comments, and why PrEP 100% belongs on the NHS
• Wild takes like “AIDS is God’s punishment” – and why that logic completely falls apart
• “Bum flu”, “nose beers”, HEV, and the best/worst slang you’ll hear this week
• Domino‑thinking anxiety: how a broken satnav becomes a £600 lifetime guilt investment
• The “economy of guilt” with siblings and why sometimes the argument is worth more than the money
• How to accidentally stay friends with people you wish you could quietly dump
• Scotland vs England vs Canada vs Germany vs Russia: national myths, Braveheart, empire denial and who “killed all the funny people”
• Larry’s blackout drinking stories, meeting famous people he doesn’t remember, and why he had sympathy for Dahmer for about 3 seconds
• Why John looks like the worst stag‑do punter in every comedy club he walks into

This episode is basically two stand‑up geeks doing what they do best: over‑thinking everything, turning trauma into bits, and never sticking to a single topic for more than 30 seconds.

Hosted by:

John Hastings – @JohnHastings

Larry Dean – @LarryDean

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In Episode 8 of The John Hastings Larry Dean Show, the boys go from Edinburgh Fringe sensitivities to World War I Canadian war crimes to full‑blown psycho exes, without ever touching the brakes.

In this episode:

• Larry’s first week of the new Edinburgh show and why audiences now worry about comics’ self‑deprecating jokes more than the comics do
• Australian festival crowds who demand a sexuality disclaimer before every punchline
• How English people think every country is just “their mate Craig” and why Scotland weirdly loves Canada
• Psycho Canadians in wartime:
• The trench “food then grenades” story
• Juno Beach, D‑Day, and why Canada went early and ruined it for everyone else
• Petty national pride: did Scotland or Canada invent the telephone, and can Larry’s exes claim his award nominations?
• Breakup body maths:
• Why Larry loses weight and his exes gain it
• John’s theory that if nothing changes after a breakup, you’re probably a murderer
• The “astronaut training for escape” rule: getting hot right before you leave someone
• John’s divorce montage: quitting smoking, juice cleanses, obsessive squats and screaming matches taken in the Comedy Store car park between spots for OnlyFans models
• Psycho ex paranoia:
• Larry’s “I didn’t hire a window cleaner” moments
• John’s coke‑fuelled married stalker who hacked his email, turned up at 5 a.m., then followed him round London gigs for months
• Why effort isn’t love, why some of your ex’s friends secretly agree with you, and how John and his current wife refuse to get on the argument roller coaster at all

Plus: autism “diagnosed” via T‑shirts, emotional manipulation in relationships, and Larry trying to trap John into admitting he’s always right in his marriage.

Follow the hosts:

• Larry Dean – @larrydeancomedy
• John Hastings – @thejohnhastings

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Two nervous boys, one chaotic podcast. In Episode 7 of The John and Larry Dean Show, John Hastings and Larry Dean spiral from housing crises to breathalyzer hacks with absolutely no segue and even less legal advice.

In this episode they cover:

• John declaring war on two of the nicest men in comedy, Justin Morehouse and Alun Cochrane
• Manchester and Stockport rent chat: “New Berlin”, single‑glazed windows and landlords who control your heating by phone
• Larry’s wardrobe regression: Space Jam T‑shirt, dungarees and dressing like an 11‑year‑old to cope with big life changes
• Vaping vs smoking, Invisalign, dental bonding and the absolute freaks who chew their keys
• Urban myths on beating breathalyzers: coins, peanut butter, sharp breaths and snapping the nozzle off (do not try this, obviously)
• Dyspraxia, driving tests, and why John probably shouldn’t be allowed behind the wheel
• North vs South (and the Midlands) audiences, local “celebrities”, Susan Boyle, gay culture and why gay men keep divas immortal
• Planning Larry’s LA honeymoon: Koreatown vs Los Feliz vs West Hollywood, and why John refuses to take a train and a bus

Plus: call‑centre Scots, masculinity voices, climate change in two months of UK weather, and whether people try to be more “butch” around Larry.

Follow the boys:

• John Hastings – @thejohnhastings
• Larry Dean – @larrydeancomedy

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 6 of the Larry Dean John Hastings Show is here! Join comedians John Hastings and Larry Dean as they dive into a chaotic, hilarious, and sometimes deep hour of conversation.

In this episode, they cover:

• The absurdities of headshots, publicity photos, and Edinburgh Fringe promos
• Autism, noise-cancelling headphones, and public chaos
• Conversion therapy stories and gay culture
• UK grocery store politics, public transport frustrations, and social etiquette
• Relationship dynamics, breakups, and navigating love with humor
• Classic comedy banter, personal anecdotes, and sharp social observations

Expect raw, irreverent, and unfiltered comedy with insights only seasoned comedians can share. This is a show for anyone who loves laughter, awkward truths, and stories that make you think and snort at the same time.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.