This week I'm talking menopause, and more specifically perimenopause, which is the longest part of the whole thing and somehow the least talked about. For years the only story we've been told about this chapter is that it's hard, miserable and something to just get through. I want to flip that. October is Menopause Awareness Month, and this Thursday night I'm part of an event here in Auckland called Becoming, which is all about reframing midlife as the most exciting and powerful chapter of our lives. I share why an event like this needs to exist in the first place. We get a roadmap for puberty. Nobody hands us one for this.

I also get honest about my own perimenopause story. Back in 2023 my periods were all over the place, I wasn't sleeping, I had a really short fuse, and I couldn't cope with noise in the car (sorry, son). I thought my PMS had just gotten worse. So I did what so many of us do. I lay in bed at night running through a list of everything I was disappointed in myself for, and went down a rabbit hole of energy supplements. Then I listened to a Mel Robbins episode with a menopause expert and realised I had almost every symptom she described. Maybe I didn't just suck at life. Maybe my hormones were shifting. That episode turned out to be the permission slip I'd probably needed my whole life to stop people pleasing.

So what do I know now that I wish I'd known at the start? When estrogen dips, so does that pull to nurture everyone, and honestly, that's a gift. It's a chance to finally ask what I want and what I need. I talk about why perimenopause is like recovering from surgery without the sling (my shoulder taught me that one), why strength training matters so much right now, why my gym membership is a gift to my son and not an indulgence, and how my true voice showed up once the good girl left the building.

Whether you're still in your baby-making years, just starting to notice changes, or well into menopause, this one's for you. I finish with a journal prompt to sit with this week: what do I need to do to give myself full permission to go after the life I deserve?

The Mel Robbins episode I mention: https://www.melrobbins.com/podcasts/episode-157

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