The Weight of Perception: Steve Chua on Shame, the Rescue Window, and Learning to Be Loved

In this episode, Steve Chua — executive life-and-leadership coach to high-net-worth leaders around the world, author of Free to Be Me: The Journey of Identity Transformation, and former pastor and worship leader — sits down with Michele Okimura and Brett K. Moore to trace the God story that took him from a shame-based identity built on external validation, through the failed Oxford exam and an eight-story window in Scotland where God rescued him through his older brother's arms, and into the ongoing work of learning to do things with God rather than for God.

Key insights include:

The power of perception, and how your perception becomes truth to you and can quietly distort the love people are already offering.

Shame as the fuel of high achievement, and how orphanness can drive a whole life toward validation rather than sonship.

The moment Steve realized he had been doing things for God, not with God, and the two-year break that opened him to a new posture.

The Oxford failure, the phone call with his dad, and a 15-year silence about the very moment they both felt the pain.

The rescue window in Scotland and the older brother who walked in at the right time.

Why the rescue alone did not undo the patterns, and what actually did.

The truth that the ministry you need is often the ministry God gives you.

Brett's own Sozo heart-night moment — choosing to be the one crying in front of the group so others could follow.

Identity work as the underlayer of everything: coaching, marriage, parenting, ministry.

Jesus came to make you a son or daughter, not a sinner filled with shame.

Resources and Links:

Free to Be Me: The Journey of Identity Transformation — Steve Chua's book on identity restoration.

InsightOut Corp — Steve's executive coaching practice for high-net-worth global leaders.

Transform Our World — the ministry where Michele first met Steve.

Rise Up a Warrior by Graham Cook — Brett's closing listening recommendation.

Note: Steve's story is not a triumph story. It is a slow, honest, decades-long story of learning to receive love from a Father who was crying on the other end of the phone the whole time. If you feel the ache of it while you listen, that ache is welcome here.

Crossing Thresholds: A Journey Through Faith, Leadership, and Divine Timing with Don Mayer

In this episode, Don Mayer shares a heartfelt journey from a struggling student to a transformative leader in faith-based education. His stories reveal how God’s power often manifests in moments of vulnerability and how trusting Him opens doors to unexpected calling and purpose.

Key insights include:

• God’s ability to turn personal weakness and perceived inadequacies into platforms for His glory
• The importance of trust and obedience in stepping over thresholds into the unknown
• How small acts of love, like caring for a sick family member or welcoming strangers, cultivate spiritual breakthrough
• The spiritual significance of cultural symbols, such as carrying a carved ship from Ecuador, representing redemption and understanding
• The reality of encountering Holy Spirit manifestations, even in unlikely settings, and learning to embrace divine gifts with faith and humility
• Practical ways to foster a culture of Holy Spirit invite in Christian schools and communities
• The ongoing process of trusting God's plan, regardless of past failures or self-doubt
• The importance of being a “leader who goes first,” paving the way for others to follow in faith

Timestamps: 00:00 - Introduction and overview of Don Mayer’s personal and spiritual journey
02:08 - How sickness and caregiving reveal love and spiritual themes
05:18 - Understanding the narrative arc: inciting incident, rising action, climax, and resolution in life stories
10:04 - The power of prayer and community in overcoming challenges
12:47 - Don’s story of trusting God into leadership at Bethel Christian School
19:26 - Creating spaces where Holy Spirit moves freely and intentionally
24:36 - The significance of divine tokens, like a carved ship from Ecuador, symbolizing faith and reconciliation
32:34 - How God’s love transforms perceptions of self and purpose
38:37 - Lessons learned from becoming a principal despite past academic struggles
49:21 - Miracles and God’s guidance in school life and ministry moments
54:54 - Crossing thresholds into God’s calling, embracing the unknown with faith
58:03 - The ongoing journey of leaders in trusting the Holy Spirit’s plan
65:32 - Impact of divine encounters on students’ lives and sustaining faith beyond childhood
70:02 - Practical steps to reignite Holy Spirit culture in Christian education
75:16 - The sweet fruit of obedience and saying yes to God’s prompts
80:35 - The prophetic imagery of honey, sweetness, and trust in divine timing
83:36 - Prayer requests for divine assignments, writing calling, and prophetic destiny fulfillment

Resources & Links:

• Bill Johnson | Bill Johnson’s Ministry
• Bethel Church
• Keys To Kingdom Education

Note: Don’s stories highlight that genuine transformation often happens at the thresholds of fear, failure, and surrender. His journey encourages leaders and believers alike to trust God’s divine process—step by step—into their God-ordained destiny.