Hosts Fara Rodriguez and Stephanie Lehman, matrimonial attorneys, dig into one of the most consequential decisions in a divorce, choosing the right lawyer. They talk through the signs that a marriage may be over, the financial timing questions worth considering before filing, and where to find a trustworthy referral, whether through friends, other attorneys, or professionals like accountants and real estate brokers. Fara and Stephanie share what to ask in a consultation, why lawyers who oversell or love bomb prospective clients are a red flag, and why a bulldog reputation does not always serve a client well in court. They also discuss the emotional weight of matrimonial work, the role of the consultation fee, and how firm size, big, small, or solo, can shape the resources available to a client.

00:00 How to Choose the Right Divorce Lawyer

00:07 Signs a Marriage May Be Over

02:00 When to Consult a Lawyer vs. Marriage Counseling

03:00 Financial Timing: Bonuses, Business Deals, and Filing for Divorce

04:00 Finding a Divorce Lawyer Through Referrals

05:00 Why Honesty with Your Divorce Lawyer Matters

06:00 The Rise of the “Silent Divorce”

08:00 Other Professional Referral Sources

09:00 Questions to Ask When Vetting a Divorce Lawyer

10:00 Managing Expectations Around Custody

11:00 Avoiding “Love Bombing” Lawyers Who Oversell

12:00 The Emotional Toll of Practicing Divorce Law

13:00 Getting Attached Without Losing Objectivity

13:30 The Consultation Fee, and Why It Matters

14:00 Talking About Money From the Start

15:00 Letting Clients Vent Without Losing Focus

16:00 Why “Bulldog” Lawyers Aren't Always the Best Choice

17:00 The Triple Threat: Negotiator, Litigator, Strategist

18:00 Big Firm vs. Small Firm vs. Solo Practitioner

19:00 Closing Thoughts and What's Next