I've spent years studying the words of thousands of criminals and people under pressure. And in all that time one of the most consistent things I've found is that the words someone chooses are the words that matter to them. Change those words and you've changed the meaning, at least in their head. In this episode of How Words Work, I look at two things that make the person you're talking to feel genuinely heard. Using their name. And using their words. Not a polished version of what they said. Not your interpretation of it. The actual words they chose. Because those words are how they see the thing. And when you use them back, it makes a difference.

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I've spent years studying the words of thousands of criminals and people under pressure. And one of the most revealing moments in any conversation isn't the answer someone gives. It's what happens in the seconds before. Do they let the question finish? Do they start with the answer or manage it first? Do they say I don't know when they don't know?

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I say honestly all the time and I'm not a liar. I know. And this episode is for you. The patterns this podcast pulls apart in criminals and manipulators show up in honest, well-intentioned people every single day. Not because those people are deceptive. Because they're nervous. Because they lack confidence in that moment. Because they're trying to please the person they're talking to. And the person listening can't tell the difference. Their brain has spent a lifetime building a library of how bad people sound. And when your words match that library, the alarm goes off. Even when everything you're saying is true. In this episode of How Words Work, Jack Fox explains why honest people trigger the same alarm as the people who deserve it, asks whether your other words are getting in the way too, and puts the one question that matters in your hands. What is this costing you?

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At the Lindsay Clancy trial an expert witness, Dr Avram Mack, provided a great example of something I warn against: starting answers with the word "so".

Listen, as his credibility erodes through this tactic, the attorney notices, then the judge notices and what Dr Mack has to say gets lost because he sounds like he's evading answering the question.

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I get this question more than any other. Is this word bad? Should I stop saying it? And the answer is always the same. Words aren't good or bad. They're just words. But every word you say sends a signal to the person hearing it. And here is the thing most people don't know. Every one of us has been lied to, manipulated, let down by someone who turned out not to be who we thought. And our brain filed that away. It built a library of how those people sounded. Now that library runs in the background of every conversation we have. The moment someone uses one of those patterns, an alarm goes off. Not loudly. But it goes off. The innocent person, the nervous person, the people pleaser. They're triggering that alarm without knowing it exists. In this episode of How Words Work, Jack Fox shows you how to audit your own words, understand what signal they're sending, and decide for yourself whether that signal is one you want to keep paying for. How Words Work is a weekly podcast with Jack Fox.

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I've spent years studying the words of thousands of criminals and people under pressure. And one of the things I've found is that some of the most revealing words in any statement aren't the big ones. They're the tiny softeners. Basically. Really. Normally. Usually. Typically. Every one of these words confesses something the speaker never intended to admit. In this episode of How Words Work, I show you exactly what these words are giving away, why suspects and manipulators reach for them, and why you're reaching for them too without realising it. Because when you say basically you're confessing that the full picture is more complicated than what you're sharing. When you say normally you're confessing that exceptions exist. When you say really you're confessing that your certainty isn't as solid as you're presenting. Strip these words out and replace them with the specific true thing. Your sentences will be shorter, more authoritative and more trusted. This is How Words Work with Jack Fox.

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I've spent years studying the words of thousands of criminals. And in all that time the most important thing I've learned is this. You already know how to hear the difference between someone you trust and someone you don't. You've always known. Today I'm going to prove it. I'm going to play you two real 911 calls. No labels. No clues. Just two men talking. And I want you to notice which one you trust. Because by the end of this episode you'll understand exactly why you felt what you felt. And you'll know how to make sure every conversation you have builds the kind of credibility that makes people want to say yes to you. This is How Words Work with Jack Fox.

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Someone asks you a question. A simple one. And instead of answering it, you tell them the story around it. The context. The background. The reasons. The timeline. By the time you stop talking they know a lot about your situation and nothing about what they asked. This is one of the most common ways people undermine their own credibility without realising it. And it gets worse the more nervous or uncomfortable you are. In this episode of How Words Work, Jack Fox uses a clip from Netflix's Maternal Instinct to show exactly what storytelling instead of answering sounds like, why the listener always feels it, and how answering the question first, simply and directly, is one of the most powerful things you can do for your confidence and credibility. How Words Work is a weekly podcast with Jack Fox.

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