If you don’t know your value, you’ll settle for less than what you deserve. In this episode of Finding Love, Jenni & Stephen Hendrix go deeper into how women show up in love—often hardened by past hurt—and how that shapes what men really see.

From Teyana Taylor’s viral headlines to Kash Doll & Za’Darius Smith’s public dynamic, the conversation unpacks the tension between protecting your peace and closing yourself off, confusing attention for intention, and the costly mistake of staying where you’re only an option.

With honesty and raw perspective, Jenni & Stephen lay out why a man who values you will prove it with consistency—and why healing and self-respect are the foundation for real love.

In this episode, we cover
• How past hurt hardens women in dating (side-eye, lip smack, walls up)
• Why men see guardedness differently than women expect
• Attention vs. intention—what real consistency looks like
• Lessons from Teyana Taylor & Kash Doll’s relationships
• Option vs. priority: the difference that defines your value
• Boundaries and standards that protect your peace without isolating you

Chapters & Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro: Why the “her value” conversation matters
00:44 – Cultural reference: Teyana Taylor and public perception of worth
03:54 – Set-up: women not showing up as themselves in early dating
04:18 – Stephen: from a man’s perspective, how past trauma hardens women
05:16 – Jenni: giving men a fair shot without self-betrayal
08:26 – Guard up vs. genuine presence: letting someone actually see you
10:58 – Protecting your peace vs. trying to prove your value
12:27 – Resetting expectations: clarity conversations early on
18:36 – Trauma patterns & rescue narratives (public examples incl. Kash Doll & Za’Darius Smith)
21:14 – Stephen: what consistency looks like beyond words
21:44 – Option vs. priority: signs he’s not all in
25:47 – Defining “value” in action, not just talk
29:49 – Standards that keep your peace without turning rigid
30:26 – Healing so you don’t misread effort or overcorrect
31:18 – Final thoughts: choosing yourself first
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