Want to know how to stop the hamster wheel in your relationship? In this episode of Heart and Soulution, Mike and Kristen Jones discuss the concept of the "crazy cycle" in romantic relationships, which they relate to Dr. Emerson Eggerichs's book, Love and Respect, derived from Ephesians 5 in the Bible. The core idea is that disrespect from the wife causes a lack of love from the husband, which in turn causes more disrespect, creating a self-perpetuating cycle that must be broken by one partner choosing to change their behavior, focusing on unconditional love and unconditional respect. The hosts emphasize the importance of emotional intelligence, managing expectations, and clear communication for couples to prevent or exit this cycle, making a crucial caveat near the end.

(C) 2025 All Music by Mike and Kristen Jones for use by Heart and Soulution, including Heart and Soulution theme, Card of the day jingle and all background music; generated with Suno.ai.

Reference material and Resources to dive deeper:

• • Dr. Gary Smalley's "Keys to Lasting and Loving Relationships"

• Chapman, Gary D., and Jennifer M. Thomas. The Five Languages of Apology: How to Experience Healing in All Your Relationships. Moody Publishers, 2008. Follow on instagram.

• Chapman, Gary D. The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts. Northfield Publishing, 2015. Follow on Instagram.

• Scazzero, P., & Scazzero, G. (2022). Emotionally Healthy Relationships: Discipleship that deeply changes your relationship with others (Updated ed.). Zondervan. EHS Website.

• The YouVersion Bible App.

• ⁠⁠⁠⁠Table Topics Tabletop Sets: Questions to start great conversations.⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with Heart and Solution:

• Follow on Instagram: Join the conversation ⁠@heartandsoulution.⁠

• Share Your Ideas: Let Mike and Kristen know your ideas for future episodes and participate in their weekly poll on ⁠Instagram⁠.

In this episode of "Heart and Soulution," hosts Mike and Kristen Jones focus on improving marriage and relationships with a biblical perspective. The discussion centers on a recent marriage conference they hosted, utilizing material from an organization called Grace Marriage, which emphasizes a grace-based rather than performance-based approach to relationships. Throughout the episode, the hosts introduce and discuss several biblical principles and verses related to conflict resolution, humility, and intentionality, such as Proverbs 15:1 and Philippians 4:8, offering practical advice like the "621 challenge" for dedicated time together and the "boxing or dancing" analogy for approaching disagreements. They conclude by encouraging listeners to focus on self-reflection and serving their spouse, hinting at future episodes that will explore specific roles within marriage.

(C) 2025 All Music by Mike and Kristen Jones for use by Heart and Soulution, including Heart and Soulution theme, Card of the day jingle and all background music; generated with Suno.ai.

Reference material and Resources to dive deeper:

• Check out material from the Parrott's by visiting their website or by following them on instagram @lesandleslie.

• Learn more about the ministry resources of Grace Marriage at their website or by following them on Instagram @grace_marriage.

• ⁠⁠⁠Table Topics Tabletop Sets: Questions to start great conversations.⁠⁠⁠

Connect with Heart and Solution:

• Follow on Instagram: Join the conversation @heartandsoulution.

• Share Your Ideas: Let Mike and Kristen know your ideas for future episodes and participate in their weekly poll on Instagram.

In this episode of Heart and Soulution, Mike and Kristen Jones engage in an open discussion about life transitions and change, particularly within the context of marriage and family life. They explore various types of transitions, including those that are initiated by choice (such as getting married or changing jobs) and those that are unexpectedly imposed (like losing a job or the death of a loved one). The conversation extensively uses the couple's personal experiences, including a major job loss and subsequent geographical move, to illustrate how they managed significant change as a couple. Key advice offered for navigating these transitions focuses heavily on communication, mutual support, and adapting to changing roles, such as when children grow up and leave home.

(C) 2025 All Music by Mike and Kristen Jones for use by Heart and Soulution, including Heart and Soulution theme, Card of the day jingle and all background music; generated with Suno.ai.

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• Connect with Heart and Solution:

  • Follow on Instagram: Join the conversation @heartandsoulution.
  • Share Your Ideas: Let Mike and Kristen know your ideas for future episodes and participate in their weekly poll on Instagram.

In this episode of the "Heart and Soulution" podcast, Mike and Kristen Jones, begin with the announcement of a giveaway winner for a Table Topics Date Night game. The main focus of the episode is a discussion on parenting boundaries, drawing heavily on the principles and laws outlined by clinical psychologist Dr. Henry Cloud, author of the book Boundaries. Mike and Kristen use their own experiences raising their four children to illustrate how they implemented these principles, emphasizing the importance of consistency, modeling good boundaries, and teaching age-appropriate responsibility through mechanisms like a unique chore and allowance system. They discuss different age ranges, from newborns (zero to one) focused on trust and nurturing, to adolescents (12 to 18), where parents must learn to release control and allow for growing independence.

(C) 2025 All Music by Mike and Kristen Jones for use by Heart and Soulution, including Heart and Soulution theme, Card of the day jingle and all background music; generated with Suno.ai.

Reference material and Resources to dive deeper:

• Cloud, Henry, and John Townsend. Boundaries with Kids: How Healthy Choices Grow Healthy Children. Zondervan, 2001.

• ⁠⁠Table Topics Tabletop Sets: Questions to start great conversations.⁠⁠

Connect with Heart and Solution:

• Follow on Instagram: Join the conversation @heartandsoulution.

• Share Your Ideas: Let Mike and Kristen know your ideas for future episodes and participate in their weekly poll on Instagram.

In this episode of Heart and Soulution, Mike and Kristen Jones diiscuss relationship dynamics and how to maintain love and friendship in a marriage, particularly after becoming parents. They begin with a casual conversation about their home life, mentioning challenges like yard work and a ladder fall, before pivoting to a listener's question about avoiding feeling like co-parents rather than spouses. The hosts emphasize the importance of intentionality, prioritizing the spouse, and making love a daily choice, and they explore strategies for building a stronger partnership, such as improving communication, sharing dreams, and preventing the "grenade" effect of major life changes like having a child. They conclude by discussing the need to treat each other as adult partners rather than children, and to woo one another according to their individual needs, reaffirming that the marriage relationship is the primary unit even with children.

(C) 2025 All Music by Mike and Kristen Jones for use by Heart and Soulution, including Heart and Soulution theme, Card of the day jingle and all background music; generated with Suno.ai.

Reference material and Resources to dive deeper:

• Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (2002), The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Harmony Books.

• ⁠⁠Table Topics Tabletop Sets: Questions to start great conversations.⁠⁠

Connect with Heart and Solution:

• Follow on Instagram: Join the conversation @heartandsoulution.

• Share Your Ideas: Let Mike and Kristen know your ideas for future episodes and participate in their weekly poll on Instagram.

In this episode of Heart and Soulution, Mike and Kristen Jones delve into the concept of apology languages, a crucial tool for improving relationships personally and professionally. Inspired by an incredible story of forgiveness, they explore the five distinct ways people give and receive apologies, based on the work of Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas. They explain why a simple "I'm sorry" might not always be enough and how understanding your own and your partner's primary apology language can lead to genuine forgiveness and rebuilding trust. The episode concludes with a "Conversation Card of the Day" and an exciting giveaway for listeners.

(C) 2025 All Music by Mike and Kristen Jones for use by Heart and Soulution, generated with Suno.ai.

Resources we mentioned:

Chapman, Gary D., and Jennifer M. Thomas. The Five Languages of Apology: How to Experience Healing in All Your Relationships. Moody Publishers, 2008.

Chapman, Gary D. The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts. Northfield Publishing, 2015.

In this follow-up to their previous discussion on fighting (4 Ways to Repair Trash Talk), Mike and Kristen dive deeper into practical tools for healthy conflict resolution. They begin by reframing conflict not as a negative, but as a necessary and good opportunity for relationship growth. Kristen breaks down the complex, multi-step process of communication and negotiation, showing how easily misunderstandings can lead to frustration, unmet expectations, and hurt. This leads to the core topic of the episode: "bids" for connection, a concept from Dr. John Gottman. A bid is any attempt to connect with your partner, and how you respond—by "turning towards" them to engage or "turning away" and shutting them down—is crucial for the health of your relationship. Mike and Kristen also discuss common conflict pitfalls, such as "harsh startups" and getting caught in a "crazy cycle" of negative reactions. They emphasize that it only takes one person to de-escalate a situation and make a change that will shift the entire dynamic of the relationship. Finally, they offer practical, easy-to-implement guidelines that couples can agree on to navigate disagreements more productively.

(C) 2025 All Music by Mike and Kristen Jones for use by Heart and Soulution, including Heart and Soulution theme, Card of the day jingle and all background music; generated with Suno.ai.

Reference material and Resources to dive deeper:

• Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (2002), The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Harmony Books.
• ⁠Table Topics Tabletop Sets: Questions to start great conversations.⁠

Connect with Heart and Solution:

• Follow on Instagram: Join the conversation @heartandsoulution.

• Share Your Ideas: Let Mike and Kristen know your ideas for future episodes and participate in their weekly poll on Instagram.

In this episode of Heart and Soulution, Mike and Kristen Jones explore the dynamics of conflict in relationships, drawing heavily on Dr. Gottman's research. The hosts discuss how healthy couples manage disagreements through "repairs," which are techniques to de-escalate tension and foster constructive conversation. They also introduce "the Four Horsemen"—criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling—as behaviors that can severely damage a relationship, contrasting them with the concept of a "relationship bank" where positive interactions build reserves to mitigate negative ones. The episode concludes with a playful segment featuring a "date night" question to encourage deeper couple communication.

(C) 2025 All Music by Mike and Kristen Jones for use by Heart and Soulution, including Heart and Soulution theme, Card of the day jingle and all background music; generated with Suno.ai.

Reference material and Resources to dive deeper:

• Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (2002), The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Harmony Books.
• Table Topics Tabletop Sets: Questions to start great conversations.

Connect with Heart and Solution:

• Follow on Instagram: Join the conversation @heartandsoulution.

• Share Your Ideas: Let Mike and Kristen know your ideas for future episodes and participate in their weekly poll on Instagram.