Grindr is one of the easiest dating apps to actually connect on—no endless swiping, no waiting for a match, just people nearby and the ability to start a conversation. But that accessibility comes with another side.

In this episode of This Is It, I’m Just Me, I take an honest look at Grindr from the good, the bad and the downright ugly: hookups, dating, friendship, love, catfishing, stolen photos, harassment, transphobia, obsession, rejection and unwanted contact.

As a trans woman, I also explore why Grindr can sometimes make it easier to find men attracted to trans women, while also creating its own complications. I look at Canadian research into queer adults and dating apps, and most importantly, the role boundaries play in online dating.

Because attraction doesn’t give anyone ownership of another person. “No” is an answer. “Don’t call me” is a boundary. And when someone repeatedly crosses that line, it’s time to pay attention.

Grindr isn’t automatically good or bad. Some people find hookups. Some find friendships. Some find love. But whatever you’re looking for, you deserve to feel safe, respected and heard.

Extra reading:
• Grindr Safety & Privacy Resources
• Pew Research Center: Online Dating & LGBTQ+ Experiences
• Canadian research on queer adults and dating apps
• Australian Institute of Criminology: Dating-App-Facilitated Sexual Violence
• Research on trans women’s experiences of Grindr

Content note: This episode discusses harassment, stalking, transphobia, sexual violence, threats and unwanted contact.