In Part Two of this Grieve That Shit conversation, Sharon Brubaker and Dr. Elijah Frazier move past introductions and into the heart of what grievers struggle with most: choice, accountability, faith, emotions, and permission to heal.

This episode challenges one of the most damaging beliefs grievers carry—that grief is something they must endure forever. Sharon and Dr. Frazier speak directly to the idea that pain is inevitable after loss, but staying trapped in suffering is not the only option.

They talk honestly about how grief can steal joy, peace, and energy when we are not aware of the choices we are making. Dr. Frazier introduces a powerful metaphor: your joy is on the auction block every day, and too often, people unknowingly give it away to pain, guilt, fear, or other people's expectations.

The conversation also dives into faith, anger at God, and the pressure grievers feel to perform spirituality instead of telling the truth. Sharon and Dr. Frazier make it clear that real healing does not require pretending, suppressing emotions, or being "good" in your grief. It requires honesty, boundaries, and the willingness to do the work.

This episode speaks directly to the griever who feels stuck, judged, or afraid to move forward. It offers permission to feel fully, question deeply, and still choose healing.

1. Why grievers often believe they have no choices and how that belief keeps them stuck

2. The difference between pain and suffering in grief

3. How joy and peace are quietly given away without awareness

4. Why accountability is not punishment but empowerment

5. The role of faith as a bridge, not a crutch

6. Why being angry at God does not block healing

7. The difference between feelings and emotions and why both matter

8. Why natural emotions like anger, anxiety, sadness, and depression are not wrong

9. How spiritual platitudes can invalidate grief and cause harm

10. Why healing requires action, not waiting

11. The importance of boundaries when you are grieving

12. Why emotions need time and space to do their job

1. Where do I feel like grief has taken away my choices?

2. What pain am I experiencing, and where might I be adding suffering on top of it?

3. In what moments do I notice my joy being "sold off" to other people or situations?

4. What emotions am I afraid to feel fully?

5. How have faith, beliefs, or expectations shaped the way I grieve?

6. Where do I feel pressure to perform healing instead of living it honestly?

7. What would it look like to give my emotions permission to do their work?

Grief is not a script.
It is not a performance.
And it is not something you have to endure forever to prove your love.

You are allowed to feel anger.
You are allowed to question faith.
You are allowed to heal.

This episode reminds grievers that emotions are not the enemy. Suppressing them is. Healing does not come from pretending everything is okay. It comes from honesty, accountability, and choosing yourself again and again.

This is Grieve That Shit.
And this is where healing continues.

In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker introduces a defining moment for The Grief School and the podcast. For the first time, she welcomes Dr. Elijah Frazier and shares the news that The Grief School is now powered by The Frazier Group.

This is not an announcement episode filled with buzzwords or credentials. It's a conversation about people, pain, and what real care actually looks like when someone is at their breaking point.

Sharon and Dr. Frazier talk openly about why grief cannot be handled by systems, scripts, or one-size-fits-all solutions. They explore the difference between easy work and necessary work, and why healing requires intentional relationships, honesty, and empowerment rather than dependency.

Dr. Frazier shares his philosophy of care, his commitment to meeting people where they are, and why building a multidisciplinary team matters when someone's life has been shaken by loss. Together, they explain how grief, mental health, physical health, faith, and life circumstances are deeply connected and why separating them often leaves people stuck.

This episode sets the foundation for what's coming next. It introduces a partnership built on trust, integrity, and the belief that grief deserves to be held by people, not processed through a system.

This is part one of a two-part conversation. Part two goes deeper into grief, choice, and what it means to move forward without abandoning your pain.

1. Why The Grief School is now powered by The Frazier Group and what that truly means

2. The difference between easy conversations and necessary conversations in healing

3. Why grief cannot be treated with cookie-cutter scripts or checklists

4. The importance of honoring each person's story instead of forcing outcomes

5. Why empowerment matters more than dependency in long-term healing

6. How unresolved grief often overlaps with weight, health, relationships, and identity

7. Why a collaborative, multidisciplinary approach serves grievers better

8. The role of intentionality in healing and decision-making

9. What it means to do heart-centered work instead of system-centered care

1. Where have I felt rushed, minimized, or misunderstood in my grief?

2. What kind of support have I been needing but not receiving?

3. How does it feel to consider care that honors my full story, not just my symptoms?

4. Where in my life do I need empowerment instead of being rescued?

5. What would it mean to feel truly seen in my grief?

Grief does not need to be fixed.
It does not need to be rushed.
And it should never be handled by a system that forgets the human in front of it.

This episode marks the beginning of a deeper, more intentional way of supporting grievers. A way that honors pain, respects complexity, and believes healing happens through real connection.

Your story is not finished.
And you deserve care that treats it that way.

This is Grieve That Shit.
And this is where healing begins.

"Grief is not a mental illness. It's not weakness. It's not a checklist to finish or a line you're supposed to move through. It's love—with nowhere left to go."

In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, gets brutally honest about everything grief isn't.

For too long, society has treated grief like a disorder to diagnose, a problem to medicate, or a series of stages to climb. But grief isn't logical, linear, or tidy—it's wild, unpredictable, and deeply human. Sharon unpacks why labeling grief as depression or PTSD misses the truth entirely, and how our culture's obsession with "fixing" pain keeps us from actually healing it.

You'll hear the truth about what happens when you zig and zag through your pain, why falling apart is part of the process, and why crying, rage, and exhaustion aren't weakness—they're proof that you loved deeply.

Because grief isn't something you escape. It's something you integrate. It's the story of love that still lives in you, even when the person you loved is gone.

• Why grief is not a mental illness—and what it actually is

• The truth about the "five stages" and why they never applied to grievers

• Why grief isn't linear, logical, or something to "get over"

• How emotional chaos (crying, anger, numbness) is a normal part of healing

• The many ways we try to numb grief—through work, food, alcohol, or pretending

• Why facing your grief head-on is the only way through

This week, write this sentence at the top of a page:
"Grief is not…"

Then finish it five times, in your own words.

"Grief is not something I can control."
"Grief is not weakness."
"Grief is not my enemy."

Keep writing until the truth feels real in your body. You're not broken—you're human.

🎥 Get the Video Series "This Is Grief" — A powerful companion to Sharon's book that walks you through every truth she teaches in this episode, with reflective journaling prompts after each lesson.

📘 Read the Book "This Is Grief" — The definition Sharon wished existed when her nephew Austin died.

🧠 Join Study Hall at The Grief School — Weekly live sessions where you can ask questions, share stories, and find tools for healing.

👉 Access everything at clickhereforhope.com