In a delightfully raunchy holiday episode of the Good Girls podcast, we dive into Christmas romance books, ranging from the delightfully cozy to the bizzare and questionable yet somehow also sexy. We sacrificed our sanity a little to read it all, ranging from the unsanitized candy cane insertion courtesy of a creepy mall Santa in Stuffed with Cole to the beastly bestiality vibes of Sir Krampus. We kick things off with somewhat horrifying Smutmas "would you rather" dilemmas (paddled by a horny Krampus or violated by a textured peppermint stick?). We choose our worst three and best three. We wrap things up with awards for the most audacious holiday props and candid chats on breeding kinks, reverse harems, and plus-size representation.

Books covered include:

Unwrap Me by Natalia Lourouse

Tangled & Tinsel by Trilina Pucci

A Merry Little Meet Cute by Julie Murphy & Sierra Simone

Sir Krampus by D. Rayle

Bought By Santa by N. Lybaek

Cruel Winter With You by Ali Hazelwood

The Christmas Fix by Lucy Score

Merry Christmas you Filthy Animal by Meghan Quinn

Gift To His Dad by J. Wilde

Lumber Snack by May Harden

Dashing all the Way by Chelsea Curto

In this slightly unhinged episode, SJ and Kay dig into sex drive and why it’s a somewhat silly, misunderstood concept. They walk through more serious theories like the ABC model (not the Jackson 5), the motivation–incentive framework, and, of course, Emily Nagoski’s accelerators and brakes...but with some major detours into less scientific territory, including Brie from Desperate Housewives and Kay’s obsession with the Unwrap Me Christmas novella by Natalia Lourose. They challenge the idea that men are constantly thinking about sex, poke holes in evolutionary narratives that try to box desire by gender, and explore why so many women hit their sexual stride in their late 20s to 40s. The conversation veers into Santa smut, the cautionary tale of using a Christmas ornament as a DIY sex toy (please do not), and why masturbation might actually be a better indicator of libido than partnered sex. With their signature mix of humor, research, and chaos, the hosts may or may not leave you with a better understanding of sex drive. ..Only guarantee from listening is that you won't look a nutcracker ornament the same way again. Cheers!

We talk about women's porn preferences and champion that it's totally fine if porn's not your vibe. We debate on quick-hit horniness vs. slow-burn romance reads, and zero in on why mainstream porn often flops. Think Pornhub's assault of unrealistically enormous assets, black-and-orange overload, and demoralizing tropes like teary face shots and "breeding" boss fantasies that prioritize peenies over desire. Backed by 2024 stats that nearly 40% of users are women with a higher interest in lesbian scenes for their female-pleasure focus. We call out the site's gateway traps: bombastic thumbnails, floodlit aesthetics, and ads with peeny panic. But fear not, fellow seekers, we talk on the hotter havens tailored for us, from Bellesea's lingerie-lush lesbian and couple clips to Tushy's plot-driven foreplay, and Make Love Not Porn's authentic chemistry. We also talk on the why books are so great in this area, with us being able to create the scene in our heads instead of having less-than-great-visuals jammed at us. With a lot of honesty, this episode's a permission slip to curate your own climax— or opt out entirely. (NSFW alert: Explicit rants and a critique of Pornhub's main page videos.)

We take a nostalgic dive and revisit our gateway smut, from early crushes on Twilight's Edward to Harry Potter's fanfic-fueled Draco and Disney's anthropomorphic foxes. We debate book-to-movie fails, our shadow daddy love origins like Han Solo and Rhett Butler, and the allure of fairy tale retellings. Minotaur romantasies get some side-eye, though we will hold off fully knocking it until Kay tries it...coming for you, Morning Glory Milking Farm. Is K-Pop demon hunters the next gen's entry to fantasy romance? We wrap with a mid-read roast of Sarah J. Maas' A Court of Silver Flames...SJ has still not come around to Nesta but Kay remains a fan.

We dive deep into Joshua Harris's infamous I Kissed Dating Goodbye, the 1997 evangelical manifesto that turned a 21-year-old's anti-dating screed into a teen purity bible. Harris went on to torch it in a wild redemption arc complete with divorce, LGBTQ+ affirmation, and chats about Skims' nipple bras. We roast the book's "Seven Habits of Highly Defective Dating," including the great myth of "saving your libido" for explosive wedding-night fireworks. We talk on how purity culture grooms people for poor relationships and rushed shotgun weddings. We end with takedowns of 2025's Epstein email excuses ("they're basically women!") and a tech bro's quest for a non-monogamous baby mama who'll bear his heirs while he... explores. Is brutal honesty hot or just narcissistic? Laugh and cringe with us, it's a good time!

SJ and Kay hop into their time machine to roast and revel in Cosmopolitan magazine's evolution from Helen Gurley Brown's questionable boss-banging tips in the 1960s to today's sex bucket lists. They critique decade-spanning gems like aiming to be the "second hottest girl in the room," blushing your nipples pink before bedtime, and feeding your man a saliva-soaked spaghetti strand à la Lady and the Tramp.

Amid the cringe...think Jeffrey Epstein as Bachelor of the Month, advice that missionary prevents STDs, and anti-cellulite thigh massages...they spotlight timeless wins like ditching mercy sex, prioritizing communication, and embracing fantasy smut escapes. Packed with laughs, side-eyes at diet culture, and a call to craft your own sex bucket list, this episode proves Cosmo's still dishing dumb-but-delightful advice. Who needs sex ed when you've got this chaotic icon?

Hosts SJ and Kay dive into the stressful intersection of anxiety and arousal, inspired by Emily Nagoski's game-changing book Come As You Are. They kick things off with asking: Would you rather hook up right before a big race, a killer exam, or amid bedtime chaos with the kids? Spoiler: Probably none because stress can make for some lame sex. They break down the stress response cycle, why cortisol is nature's cockblock, and share science-backed hacks like 20-second hugs and dance breaks to "complete the cycle." From Good Girls Research Division, they roast an awkward 2010 study involving vaginal probes and '90s erotica. Plus, SJ shares her unfiltered hot takes on the third book in Sarah J. Maas's A Court of Thorns and Roses series—think vanilla fairy sex, power imbalances, and a plea for more queer fae foursomes. Whether you're avoiding dishes or daydreaming of magical mates, tune in for laughs and validation.

Okay, good girls and boys, SJ and Kay are here to dish out our "Dear Abby, Good Girls Style" advice full of questionable wisdom. The gals tackle your juiciest queries with zero filter and questionable expertise. From a hubby who's all tongue and no technique…Daisy L., we're side-eyeing the long tongue situation…to a down-there "stench" shade that's killed the vibe…Confidence P., that man hardly deserves a sad handjob.

They cackle through vibrator detox dilemmas. multi-orgasm marathons that leave her pooped, and that wild-card MFM threesome thirst. It's chaotic, cathartic, and probably accurate – but hey, laughter's the best foreplay.

Whether you're rebuilding mojo or just eavesdropping on our unhinged unloads, this one's for anyone who's ever faked a finale or fantasized a fantasy. Hit play, and remember: questionable advice is still advice. Warnings: explicit AF, earbuds mandatory. Stream on all pods – next round's on you!