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Most of us were never taught how to build, maintain, or even think about our relationships, so we carry around an outdated measuring stick for friendship and judge ourselves by it. Emilia Smith and Bianca Thomas get honest about why so many growth-minded people believe they are bad friends, and what changes when you finally define friendship on your own terms.

In this episode, we unpack Aristotle’s three types of friendship (utility, pleasure, and virtue) and why most of us never move past the first two. Emilia and Bianca share the journal prompt that revealed a couple’s hidden friendship expectations, lessons from Movie Club’s discussion of Remarkably Bright Creatures, and how their own friendship grew from a Muay Thai gym into building Evolve Ventures together. You’ll learn why the deepest friendships require candor and discomfort, why growth is the foundation of lasting connection, and why asking “good friend for who?” might be the most freeing question you can ask yourself.

Here’s a related episode that builds on today’s conversation: #540 | Who Do You Turn To For Your Most Meaningful Wins? - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/540-who-do-you-turn-to-for-your-most-meaningful-wins/id1511831621?i=1000790313991

Learn more about:

🤝 Out of the Mud (OOTM) - "The Fear of Needing People" - https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/IykObX8eR7ixJaQ-qqZogw#/registration

📆 Evolve Group Coaching - https://evolveventurestech.com/evolve-group-coaching/

📽️ Insightful films. Meaningful growth. Join our Evolve Movie Club - https://forms.gle/bBZUbFEeD2ijypCT7

🌱 The #YouDoYou Therapy Program gives you support when and how you need it. No pressure. Just real help. Start your free 7-day trial today - https://buy.stripe.com/fZe8Avdfx8bW9gcfZc

Connect with Emilia, Bianca & the EVOLVE VENTURES Community:

Website: http://www.evolveventurestech.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/evolveventures/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/EvolveVenturesTech (Public Page)

Evolve Ventures Society (Private Facebook Group) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/457130589193794

Emilia’s IG - https://www.instagram.com/evolvewithemilia/

Emilia’s TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@evolvewithemilia

Bianca’s IG - https://www.instagram.com/evolvewithbianca/

Bianca’s TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@evolvewithbianca?_t=8gq3wqu4fAx&_r=1

Connect with Emilia from Evolve Ventures for FREE: https://calendly.com/emiliasmith/free-evp-communityconnect

Show notes:

(0:00) Intro
(1:25) The friendship definition you inherited
(3:50) What couples never ask about friends
(8:40) Lessons from Remarkably Bright Creatures
(11:19) Who seeks friendship to grow
(15:44) From Muay Thai to sisterhood
(19:05) Emilia invites you to join Out of the Mud, the free live virtual event hosted the last Wednesday of every month.
(20:03) Aristotle’s three types of friendship
(30:17) A deep kid without the words
(34:33) Why most people avoid this depth
(37:33) Good friend for who
(39:50) Outro

***Leave them a 5-star review if you felt their energy, became inspired, or felt the value was added to your life in your EVOLUTION.

(Stay tuned for this coming Thursday's episode!)

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Every yes you can’t sustain is a no you’ll pay for later. The most capable person in the room is usually the one handed more, and the fear of saying no to a boss can feel so intense it hits you in the gut. Emilia Smith and Bianca Thomas talk directly to the high performers and people pleasers who keep taking on more, and they are clear that this conversation is not for anyone looking to do less work.

In this episode, we unpack how to say no to your boss without fearing the worst. Through a real story about a top performer stretched across multiple roles, Emilia and Bianca explain how boundaries protect what you value, why burnout quietly drains the talent organizations depend on, and what Price’s Law shows about the few people who carry most of a team’s output. You’ll learn how to weigh the short-term and long-term trade-offs of saying no, how to see your boss’s view of the whole system, and how to frame your no as a team-focused conversation about priorities and deadlines instead of a flat refusal.

Here’s a related episode that builds on today’s conversation:
#510 | How to Cultivate a Conscious Leader’s Mindset - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/510-how-to-cultivate-a-conscious-leaders-mindset/id1511831621?i=1000771122618

Learn more about:

🤝 Out of the Mud (OOTM) - "What You're Carrying That Was Never Yours To Hold" - https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/IykObX8eR7ixJaQ-qqZogw#/registration

📆 Evolve Group Coaching - https://evolveventurestech.com/evolve-group-coaching/

📽️ Insightful films. Meaningful growth. Join our Evolve Movie Club - https://forms.gle/bBZUbFEeD2ijypCT7

🌱 The #YouDoYou Therapy Program gives you support when and how you need it. No pressure. Just real help. Start your free 7-day trial today - https://buy.stripe.com/fZe8Avdfx8bW9gcfZc

Connect with Emilia, Bianca & the EVOLVE VENTURES Community:

Website: http://www.evolveventurestech.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/evolveventures/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/EvolveVenturesTech (Public Page)

Evolve Ventures Society (Private Facebook Group) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/457130589193794

Emilia’s IG - https://www.instagram.com/evolvewithemilia/

Emilia’s TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@evolvewithemilia

Bianca’s IG - https://www.instagram.com/evolvewithbianca/

Bianca’s TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@evolvewithbianca?_t=8gq3wqu4fAx&_r=1

Connect with Emilia from Evolve Ventures for FREE: https://calendly.com/emiliasmith/free-evp-communityconnect

Show notes:
(0:00) Intro
(1:28) Saying no without fearing the worst
(3:45) The top performer wearing every hat
(9:04) Boundaries protect what you value
(12:36) Resentment, burnout, and the high performer
(18:31) Kaylee shares her experience as a member of the Evolve Ventures
(19:24) The math behind Price’s Law
(21:37) Holding both sides of the business
(26:54) Framing your no around sustainability
(32:08) Making your no a team-focused no
(34:14) Outro

***Leave them a 5-star review if you felt their energy, became inspired, or felt the value was added to your life in your EVOLUTION.

(Stay tuned for this coming Monday's episode!)

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Toxic resilience isn’t strength. It’s what happens when your worth gets tied to how much you can get done, and no amount of doing ever feels like enough. If you grew up watching burnt out parents stretch themselves thin, or you can’t relax without feeling like something is wrong with you, this conversation is for you.

In this episode, we unpack where the “do it all” mindset comes from, why ever growing to-do lists chip away at self-esteem, and how constant output keeps your nervous system stuck in panic mode. Emilia and Bianca explain the difference between real resilience and rigid overextension, the pressure men and women feel to be Superman or do everything flawlessly, and how staying busy often becomes a way to outrun uncomfortable emotions. You’ll also hear why comparing your starting point to someone else’s ten years of practice isn’t fair to you, and why learning to say no may be the hardest skill of all.

Here’s a related episode that builds on today’s conversation:
#540 | Who Do You Turn to For Your Most Meaningful Wins? - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/540-who-do-you-turn-to-for-your-most-meaningful-wins/id1511831621?i=1000790313991

Learn more about:

🤝 Out of the Mud (OOTM) - "What You're Carrying That Was Never Yours To Hold" - https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/IykObX8eR7ixJaQ-qqZogw#/registration

📆 Evolve Group Coaching - https://evolveventurestech.com/evolve-group-coaching/

📽️ Insightful films. Meaningful growth. Join our Evolve Movie Club - https://forms.gle/bBZUbFEeD2ijypCT7

🌱 The #YouDoYou Therapy Program gives you support when and how you need it. No pressure. Just real help. Start your free 7-day trial today - https://buy.stripe.com/fZe8Avdfx8bW9gcfZc

Connect with Emilia, Bianca & the EVOLVE VENTURES Community:
Website: http://www.evolveventurestech.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/evolveventures/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/EvolveVenturesTech (Public Page)

Evolve Ventures Society (Private Facebook Group) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/457130589193794
Emilia’s IG - https://www.instagram.com/evolvewithemilia/

Emilia’s TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@evolvewithemilia

Bianca’s IG - https://www.instagram.com/evolvewithbianca/

Bianca’s TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@evolvewithbianca?_t=8gq3wqu4fAx&_r=1

Connect with Emilia from Evolve Ventures for FREE: https://calendly.com/emiliasmith/free-evp-communityconnect

Show notes:
(0:00) Intro
(1:24) Family narratives about doing it all
(3:00) When your worth depends on output
(9:51) A culture that values only what you produce
(10:54) Superman expectations for men and women
(12:18) Balance is a recipe, not 50/50
(15:43) Bianca invites you to join Out of the Mud, the free live virtual event hosted the last Wednesday of every month.
(16:22) Suffering as a badge of honor
(24:06) Outro

***Leave them a 5-star review if you felt their energy, became inspired, or felt the value was added to your life in your EVOLUTION.

(Stay tuned for this coming Thursday’s episode!)