The technical skills that earned you your promotion are impressive, but leading a team requires a different toolkit.

When high performers step into leadership, it is natural to want to maintain control by "doing it all yourself." However, this often leads to exhaustion and what we call the "Valley of Despair."

In this episode, Patrick sits down with Walter Dusseldorp (The Dutch Mentor) to explore the journey from technical expert to confident leader. Walter shares his mentorship approach, focusing on small, manageable behavioural changes that create lasting results.

You will learn the difference between having a relationship with your team and building a true partnership. Plus, discover the "Parking Lot Experiment"—a simple exercise to help you understand the nature of habit change—and why measuring your progress is the kindest thing you can do for your career.

✅ Navigating the Valley: How to recognise the signs of the "Valley of Despair" and view them as a natural part of your growth curve.

✅ Mentor vs. Coach: Understanding the value of guidance based on deep personal experience.

✅ The 15-Minute Rule: How to sustainably build your leadership skills with just 15 minutes of focused intention per day.

✅ The Parking Lot Experiment: A humble test to help you understand the psychology of changing habits.

✅ Relationship vs. Partnership: Moving beyond simply "knowing" your team to "rowing the boat" together in perfect sync.

✅ Cadence of Accountability: How regular check-ins provide the structure and support needed for success.

❗️Your Ethical Persuasion Challenge ❗️

1. The Parking Lot Experiment: Try a small experiment in habit change. For the next 30 days, park in the spot furthest from the door. It is a simple way to build empathy for how difficult change can be for your team.

2. The 15-Minute Pause: Give yourself permission to stop "doing" for 15 minutes a day. Use this time to learn, reflect, or plan. Prioritising your growth is a leadership act.

3. Define Your Why: To lead others effectively, it helps to know yourself. Take some time this week to write down your personal "Why."

Resources Mentioned:

Guest: Walter Dusseldorp, The Dutch Mentor

App: The Dutch Mentor App (Available on App Store)

Books by Walter: The Happy Leader, Pure Leadership Power

https://www.thedutchmentor.com/about

GIVE AWAY: Free Strategy Call at TheDutchMentor.com

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Patrick’s Social Media Links:

Podcast - https://ethicalpersuasion.com.au/podcast/

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Linkedin - https://www.linkedin.com/in/patrick-van-der-burght/

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It's the most wonderful time of the year... but wouldn't it be better if it happened twice?

In this special holiday episode, Patrick van der Burght puts his "Detective of Influence" hat on to solve a fun problem: How do we ethically persuade Santa Claus to double his visits?

Through this playful thought experiment, you'll see the 7 Principles of Persuasion in a whole new light. From calculating the exact amount of milk needed to trigger true Reciprocity (it involves 2,200 Airbus A380s!) to finding Social Proof among other legendary figures, this episode is a fun refresher on the science of influence.

✅ Reciprocity Revisited: Why leaving cookies for Santa isn't a true gift (it's a transaction), and the massive logistical challenge of sending him a real gift first.

✅ The "We" in Christmas: How to use the Principle of Unity by reminding Santa that we co-created our children's upbringing.

✅ Social Proof for Legends: How pointing to the Tooth Fairy (who visits often) and La Befana (who brings sweets) creates a powerful peer pressure for Santa.

✅ Consistency Commitments: Analysing Santa's past statements ("I read every letter") to lock him into a new commitment.

✅ Ethical Scarcity: Using the fleeting nature of childhood and the competition from "screens" to create genuine urgency for handmade toys.

✅ A Call for Authority: A special challenge for Cialdini Certified Practitioners to leave a "trust-building" comment on social media!

❗️Your Ethical Persuasion Challenge (Holiday Edition)❗️

1. The "True Gift" Test: This Christmas, try giving a gift without expectation. No "you have to come to dinner to get it." Just send it. See how it changes the feeling of Reciprocity.

2. Unity at the Table: If family arguments start, switch to "We" language. "We all care about this family." Watch the tension drop.

3. Donate: Use your influence for good. Find a local charity and make a donation to help those who are struggling this season.

Resources Mentioned:

Charity Challenge: Patrick encourages everyone to pick a charity that helps children and donate this season.

LEGO #BuildToGive: Build a heart from LEGO, share it with #BuildToGive, and they donate a set to a child in need.

Previous Episodes: A great time to catch up on the foundational episodes if you missed them!

Complimentary Membership Portal: Access exclusive tools and track your learning.

https://ethicalpersuasion.com.au/podcast-member-area-registration/

Patrick’s Social Media Links:

Podcast - https://ethicalpersuasion.com.au/podcast/

Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/@ethicalpersuasion

Linkedin - https://www.linkedin.com/in/patrick-van-der-burght/

If you think Social Proof is just about collecting 5-star reviews, you are leaving massive success on the table.

In this episode, Patrick explores the Principle of Social Proof, the rule that says we follow the lead of others, especially when we are uncertain.

He reveals the stunning "Food Court Study," where a simple change in imagery took a compliance rate from 25% to 75% (a 200% increase!). You’ll also hear the fascinating history of the shopping cart, why kids stopped fearing dogs after watching a video, and why visual artists (photographers and web designers) hold the keys to your persuasion success.

✅ The Food Court Study: How changing an image from one person eating to multiple people eating tripled the results.

✅ The 3 Amplifiers: To make Social Proof work, you need Numerousness (lots of people), Similarity (people like us), and Uncertainty (we follow others when we aren't sure).

✅ The Shopping Cart Story: Why Sylvan Goldman’s invention failed until he paid people to use them in front of real customers.

✅ The "Visual Industry" Warning: Why photographers and web designers need to understand this science to avoid costing their clients sales.

✅ The 5-Star Myth: Why a perfect 5-star average review score is not the most persuasive score you can have.

✅ The "Dark Side": A look at fake testimonials (Sony, Sunday Riley) and the tragic real-world consequences of negative social proof in media (Netflix’s 13 Reasons Why).

❗️Your Ethical Persuasion Challenge❗️

1. Audit Your Images: Look at your website or brochures. Are you showing single individuals or groups? Remember the food court study—numerousness matters.

2. Check Your Testimonials: Are you matching testimonials to the prospect? If you are pitching a female director in her 50s, don't show her a testimonial from a young male graduate. Use similarity.

3. Spot the Fakes: Be a detective. If a company uses vague social proof, investigate it. Don't let the "Dark Side" manipulate your decisions.

Resources Mentioned:

Episode 2: The Science of Human Decision-Making

https://ethicalpersuasion.com.au/podcast/0002-the-science-of-human-decision-making-stop-talking-to-the-wrong-brain/

Complimentary Membership Portal: Access exclusive tools and track your learning.

https://ethicalpersuasion.com.au/podcast-member-area-registration/

Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion by Dr. Robert Cialdini

https://www.google.com/search?q=Dr+Cialdini+book+Influence

Patrick’s Social Media Links

Podcast : https://ethicalpersuasion.com.au/podcast/

Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/@ethicalpersuasion

Linkedin - https://www.linkedin.com/in/patrick-van-der-burght/

Facebook - https://web.facebook.com/ethicalpersuasion/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/ethical_persuasion/