In this powerful episode, Holly speaks with Katie about her journey through an abusive relationship in her late teens, the impact of being estranged from her family, and what it meant to live in constant survival mode. Katie explains how behaviours like gaslighting, stalking, financial control and extreme highs and lows were normalised as “love” because no one had ever taught her the signs of abuse.

She shares the turning point of repeated police involvement, the barriers she faced in seeking help, and how not knowing about services like refuge and specialist domestic abuse support kept her trapped for longer. Katie reflects on what friends and family did that helped, what unintentionally pushed her closer to her abuser, and why kindness, calm listening and staying present are so important.

Katie also talks about Claire’s Law and how “right to ask” and “right to know” checks can help people find out if a partner has a history of violence. Now working for Pennine Domestic Abuse Partnership (PDAP), she describes her ongoing healing, living with PTSD, the role of mental health services, and how her definition of safety has shifted from “a roof and food” to peace, stability and self respect.

Throughout, Katie offers messages of solidarity for other survivors, reminding listeners that they are believed, they are not alone and that taking life one day at a time can still lead to huge change over the years.

If you are affected by anything in this episode, you are not alone. Support is available:

• Pennine Domestic Abuse Partnership (PDAP) Local specialist domestic abuse support across Kirklees, including refuge, one to one and group work. Website: https://pdap.co.uk

• WomenCentre (Kirklees and Calderdale) Support for women around safety, mental health and wellbeing. Website: https://womencentre.org.uk

• National Domestic Abuse Helpline (Refuge) Free 24 hour confidential support for women experiencing domestic abuse. Website: https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk Phone: 0808 2000 247

• Men’s Advice Line Confidential support for men experiencing domestic abuse. Website: https://mensadviceline.org.uk Phone: 0808 801 0327

• Galop Support for LGBT+ people experiencing abuse. Website: https://galop.org.uk

• Samaritans For anyone struggling to cope or having thoughts of suicide. Website: https://www.samaritans.org Phone: 116 123

Please check local services in your area if you are outside the UK. If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 999.

This episode was kindly funded by the Mayor of West Yorkshire through the Mayor's Safer Communities Fund and the Mayor's People Fund.

Don't forget to subscribe for new episodes or sign up to the Destination information & opportunities web-app for teens and young adults at www.destination.org.uk where you can find loads of useful life-benefiting content for young people.

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Special thanks to Jimi for editing and Youth Social www.youthsocial.co.uk for pulling everything together.

Finally special thanks for Paul A Jackson for the music.