Parents often describe the transition from one child to two as harder than becoming a parent in the first place. This transition can be difficult because your family system is changing, your demands are increasing, your sleep is getting disrupted, and your relationships are reorganizing - not because you’re doing it wrong. This episode focused on why and how to prepare your child and family for adding a new sibling. This included:

Reviewing research and providing examples on:

• How the transition from 1 to 2 kids is a shift for the entire family
• What to expect developmentally, behaviorally, and emotionally from your older child
• How the transition affects your relationships with your older child and partner

Describing strategies to use in your own parenting:

• Prepare your child, but don’t oversell the baby
• Protect the older child’s connection with you - even 10 to 15 minutes uninterrupted a day
• Expect regression from your older child and don’t panic
• Keep routines as consistent as possible and make big changes before or months after
• Involve your child as much as they want but don’t parentify them
• Validate your older child’s feelings (especially jealousy)
• Avoid blaming the baby - tiny wording shifts make a big difference!
• Let your older child stay little - give cuddles, support, etc. as much as you can
• Don’t force sibling love - sibling relationships grow from thousands of interactions
• Let your older child hear you tell the baby to “wait” too
• Give yourself and your partner grace!

Suggesting books:

• “I Am a Big Brother / I Am a Big Sister” by Caroline Jayne Church
• “Julius, Baby of the World” by Kevin Henkes
• “Hello in There!: A Big Sister’s Book of Waiting” by Jo Witek
• “You Were the First” by Patricia MacLachlan
• “The New Small Person” by Lauren Child
• “Being the Biggest” by Molly Mead

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If you want more support with understanding your child’s behaviors, emotions, or development:

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