What do we do when our reaction feels bigger than the moment itself?

Maybe it was a tone, a delayed response, unexpected feedback, or a moment of distance. Before we even have time to think, our body responds, our mind fills in the gaps, and the moment starts to mean something.

In this solo episode, Dr. Trevor Hislop continues the Renovi Flow series by exploring the third movement of relational renewal: Reframe.

Reframe helps us slow down and notice that we often react not just to what happened, but to what we made it mean. Sometimes the meaning we attach to the present moment is shaped by an older story, a protective response, or a familiar relational pattern. As Trevor notes in the episode, “If it’s hysterical, it’s historical.”

Reframe is not denial, positive thinking, spiritual bypassing, or excuse-making. It is learning to see with truer eyes, holding compassion and responsibility, story and impact, understanding and change.

• Why “it’s not actually about what it’s about”
• How present moments can activate old stories
• Why our brain and body move quickly toward protection
• What instant stories are and how they shape relational reactions
• Why feelings are signals, not final verdicts
• The power of the words and maybe
• How to move from blame to pattern-thinking
• Why protective behaviors are often solutions before they become problems
• How Reframe helps us see ourselves, others, God, and our relationships with deeper truth

Key Takeaway: The story that shaped you doesn’t have to be the story that defines you.

Practice:

When a reaction feels bigger than the moment, slow down and ask:

1. What happened?
2. What story did I tell myself?
3. What did that story make me feel and do?
4. What is a truer frame?

Resources:

Download the Reframe Practice Guide to help you notice the instant story, examine the frame, and practice seeing with deeper truth.
Click here: Reframe Practice Guide

Learn more about Dr. Trevor Hislop, Renovi Relational Therapy, and The Deeper by Design Podcast at trevorhislop.com.