Physicians are trained to accumulate data, credentials, answers, certainty, and to introduce themselves through their titles. Dr. Joanne Sotelo steps outside all of that for a retreat with roughly twenty strangers and one guiding question: Who am I? No curriculum, no agenda, just Dharma talks, nature, and the uneasiness of not being able to look up the answer.

Drs. Sotelo and Hurley trace what shifted at home: belongings looked like weight rather than worth, and her roles turned out to be things she could observe rather than the whole of who she is. Small immersive rooms with real guides, they argue, are among the most powerful catalysts available, and investing in yourself isn't selfishness; it's fuel.

Key Takeaways To Listen For

• Walking in with minimal expectations and openness produced more insight than any curriculum could have
• The answers that matter most tend to be simple; physicians instinctively over-explain, over-intellectualize, and reach for more information
• You can observe your roles, profession, accomplishments, history without internalizing them, and that distance is where the deeper question begins
• Sitting in uncertainty is the discomfort most physicians spend a career avoiding, and it is often where the real growth happens
• Your response to your environment is yours to choose; staying grounded in chaos creates a ripple that carries to everyone around you

“What do I need to be lighter in my life, which will allow me to have the bright energy I want to have for what's important for me in this season of my life.” - Dr. Joanne Sotelo

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Find every episode at https://www.createmeaninginmedicine.com

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🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/create-meaning-in-medicine/id1752701820

The closet, the calendar, and the overflowing to-do list are often about more than organization. They can be messages, sometimes uncomfortable ones, for women who have run out of bandwidth, not competence.

Meryl Paspa joins Drs. Joanne Sotelo and Erin Hurley to explore how clutter can reflect overwhelm, shifting identities, and the changing demands of women's lives. She reframes clutter as feedback rather than failure and introduces her CLEAR framework: gaining clarity on who you're becoming, lightening your load by releasing what no longer serves you, embracing your decisions, aligning your choices with who you are, and reimagining the space you've created. The conversation is warm, disarmingly personal, and immediately practical.

Key Takeaways To Listen For

• Clutter, whether physical, mental, or on your calendar, is feedback, not failure. It signals that bandwidth has run out, not competence
• Clearing without a vision of who you're becoming just creates a vacuum. The space refills with something else unless identity shifts first
• Closets and calendars are identity places, not storage. What you keep and what you release reflects a version of you
• Not all clutter belongs to you. Naming whose it actually is loosens the reflexive assumption that you must manage everyone's stuff
• Sentimental items and grief call for extra support and patience, and you can allow postponing a decision you're not ready to make

"If we think of [difficult times in life] as transitions instead of challenges and difficulties, I think the perspective and our energy and our focus changes." — Meryl Paspa

About Meryl Paspa: Meryl Paspa is an author, speaker, and coach who helps women in transition move beyond clutter and overwhelm to create space for who they are becoming. She is a Certified Holistic Health Coach, Certified High Performance Coach, and licensed Aesthetician with more than two decades of experience working with women. Her first book, CLEAR: How to Let Go of Clutter and Create Space for Who You're Becoming, is available now on Amazon.

Connect with Meryl Paspa:

Website: https://merylpaspa.com

Book (CLEAR): https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0HJMKXMMF

Free CLEAR Companion Workbook: https://merylpaspa.com/clear-workbook/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/merylpaspa/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mjpaspa/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/merylpaspa

Substack: https://substack.com/@merylpaspa

Connect With Us

Find every episode at https://www.createmeaninginmedicine.com

▶️ Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@createmeaninginmedicine

🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/create-meaning-in-medicine/id1752701820

A breast cancer diagnosis arrived for Dr. Erin Hurley despite preventive surgeries after she learned she carried a BRCA2 mutation. What followed was a period of waiting and wondering whether the disease had spread, but also a turning point. She shares how the coaching she had started just three months earlier helped her approach the diagnosis with more calm, connection, and intention.

The experience reshaped how she approaches everything from how she spends her time to the relationships she refuses to put off. The conversation explores gratitude, boundaries, asking for help, and the sister and friend whose stories taught her that tomorrow isn't guaranteed. Drs. Hurley and Sotelo also discuss the arrival fallacy: the tendency to put life on hold until things calm down, rather than making room for what matters now. Through mentorship, community, and more intentional choices, Dr. Erin shares how she has built a life more aligned with her values.

Key Takeaways To Listen For

• Support and connection arrived as a form of protection long before the diagnosis did; the coach was hired about twelve weeks earlier, and that groundwork carried into the biopsy room
• Gratitude and fear can coexist in the same season; a stage one diagnosis with no chemotherapy is not the same as a late-stage diagnosis
• Don't keep postponing meaningful experiences: Dr. Erin's friendship and Costa Rica trip with Marty taught her to make plans while there's still time
• Women physicians can fall into the arrival fallacy, postponing the life they want until a calmer moment that may never come
• Change is possible, and getting support matters: find the community that believes in your goals and helps you create your desired outcomes

Resources Mentioned

• Chart Notes publication by the Marion-Polk County Medical Society (PAGE 14): https://www.mpmedsociety.org/resources/Documents/Q4%202024%20ChartNotes%20Web.pdf

“We have this appreciation for life, and tomorrow's not guaranteed. What am I going to do today, so that I can say when it's my time, I did live with no regrets.” - Dr. Erin Hurley

Connect With Us

Find every episode at https://www.createmeaninginmedicine.com

▶️ Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@createmeaninginmedicine

🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/create-meaning-in-medicine/id1752701820

Nine years ago, Dr. Erin Hurley learned she had breast cancer after finding a lump despite having had a preventive mastectomy years earlier. What followed was fear, uncertainty, and weeks of waiting, but also a turning point. She shares how the coaching she had started just three months earlier helped her approach the diagnosis with more calm, connection, and intention.

Those lessons have changed the way she approaches everything from yearly cancer follow-ups to moments of everyday stress. The conversation explores meditation, breathing, asking for help, and making space for joy, along with Dr. Erin’s “flourish first” approach she uses for herself and for her coaching clients: taking care of yourself so well that you flourish to support whatever may come your way. This includes acknowledging fear without letting it run the show.

Key Takeaways To Listen For

• A hard cry after a coaching call isn't a setback; it's often the release that lets a different state of mind arrive, one that says you've got this, whatever the results may be
• Service compounds. Volunteering on a medical society board and for a hereditary-cancer organization years earlier produced the exact surgeon, oncologist, and support network needed at diagnosis
• Waiting for test results can be a stress-laden ordeal, yet we can lessen the impact by reclaiming what's controllable and where and how you shape the days around the wait
• Practices like belly breathing, extended exhales, and adequate sleep can become automatic under pressure, especially when built during calm times, and even occasional use helps
• Turn a potentially dreaded medical trip into something meaningful: connection, friends, good food, a farmers market conversation. These associations rewire our reaction to the event, and each year can get easier

“When I can flourish first, when I do the best job at taking care of myself, that's going to give me the most resources to acknowledge the worry and keep it in its place.” - Dr. Erin Hurley

Connect With Us

Find every episode at https://www.createmeaninginmedicine.com

▶️ Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@createmeaninginmedicine

🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/create-meaning-in-medicine/id1752701820

This podcast started with a different name, four hosts, and two episodes a week. Some of that worked, and some didn't. Instead of just pushing through, the team paid attention, got honest about what was working, and made changes. That's how the show reached its 200-episode milestone.

Drs. Hurley and Sotelo look back at the lessons that have shaped them. Joanne tells how her biggest retreat so far only worked once she let go of hyper-independence and leaned on a team. Erin talks about how being a breast cancer survivor taught her to live with no regrets. Along the way, they share the "sparkle journal," explain why collaboration multiplies results instead, and challenge the arrival fallacy that keeps so many women in medicine putting off their own joy.

Key Takeaways To Listen For

• Celebrating wins, big and small, recharges you. Skipping it drains the fuel you need to build momentum for what comes next
• A sparkle journal captures compliments, wins, and positive moments as concrete evidence you can return to when you're struggling
• Many women physicians treat hyper-independence as part of who they are. Asking for help frees you to be present where it matters most
• Working alone, you're limited. Collaboration allows you to multiply your impact
• Stop waiting for life to become easier before making room for joy; protecting even small spaces for what matters can change how you experience the present

Resources Mentioned

• Episode 172 with Dr. Todd Otten: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/172-dr-todd-otten-suck-it-up-buttercup-and-the-fight/id1752701820?i=1000761689443

“Don't wait for some time in the future to start living; the journey is today.” - Dr. Erin Hurley

“We are allowed to do other things and expand, and we have endless possibilities.” - Dr. Joanne Sotelo

Connect With Us

Find every episode at https://www.createmeaninginmedicine.com

▶️ Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@createmeaninginmedicine

🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/create-meaning-in-medicine/id1752701820

Physicians are trained to recognize crisis in everyone except themselves. Drs. Erin Hurley and Joanne Sotelo explore how competence, productivity, and the pressure to keep going can hide serious distress, especially among women physicians.

Burnout, depression, and suicidal thoughts require different forms of support. The episode examines when coaching or psychiatric care may be needed, the fears that keep physicians from seeking help, and how simply asking, staying present, and offering support can make a difference.

Key Takeaways To Listen For

• Women physicians lose the protective gap seen in the general population, where men complete suicide at higher rates than women; in medicine, that disparity disappears entirely
• Burnout, depression, and suicidality sit on a spectrum that requires distinct interventions; offering a meditation app to someone with severe depression is as mismatched as yoga for a myocardial infarction
• The invisible responsibilities women carry, like caregiving, relationship maintenance, hormonal load, and the "second shift" at home, compound professional stress through pathways that mimic chronic trauma
• Fear of licensing disclosure, credentialing repercussions, and being labeled "impaired" remain powerful, solvable barriers that institutions and policy are only beginning to address
• Asking someone directly whether they are having suicidal thoughts does not increase their risk; isolation and unspoken pain do

Resources Mentioned

• Episode 133: Physician Suicide, Stigma & Hope in Healthcare: Corey Feist Speaks Out - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/133-physician-suicide-stigma-hope-in-healthcare-corey/id1752701820?i=1000761689635
• The Harmonized Healer - https://reset.theharmonizedhealer.com/

“Just because someone else has it worse doesn't mean that your pain is any less.” - Dr. Joanne Sotelo

Connect With Us

Find every episode at https://www.createmeaninginmedicine.com

▶️ Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@createmeaninginmedicine

🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/create-meaning-in-medicine/id1752701820

People-pleasing is more than a boundary issue, especially for women physicians. This episode explores how conflict avoidance, perfectionism, and self-sacrifice can become deeply wired responses shaped by socialization, professional culture, and the nervous system.

The conversation offers practical ways to break the pattern through self-compassion, greater awareness, and intentional pauses, helping physicians make choices that protect their energy, peace, and well-being.

Key Takeaways To Listen For

• People-pleasing is not just being nice; it is often overriding your own needs, limits, and values to manage someone else's reaction
• Many physicians are trained to confuse self-sacrifice with professionalism, which makes unhealthy overgiving feel normal and even admirable
• The pattern can be partly understood as a nervous system response, especially when conflict avoidance and approval-seeking feel automatic rather than fully chosen
• A better question than "Can I do this?" is "What will this cost me if I say yes?"
• Change happens through awareness, safety, clarity, and repetition, not through judging yourself for how deeply the pattern is wired

“People pleasing is when we override our own needs, our limits, our values, what's important to us, our truth, to manage someone else's reaction.” - Dr. Joanne Sotelo

Connect With Us

Find every episode at https://www.createmeaninginmedicine.com

▶️ Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@createmeaninginmedicine

🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/create-meaning-in-medicine/id1752701820