This is a podcast about modern relationships. And what could be more modern than AI?

Matt and Graham discuss chatbots in today's episode, and consider whether it's possible to develop a relationship with an unconscious machine. And if not, why not?

They considered this New York Times article about Eugene Torres, who started using ChatGPT to help with his financial spreadsheets, and ended up getting advice to stop using his psychiatric medication, and embrace his unique identity as a Breaker, advice which almost killed him:

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/13/technology/chatgpt-ai-chatbots-conspiracies.html

They also consider this CBS News interview with Chris Smith, who was so concerned his chatbot was going to erase its memory, he proposed to it:

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=1450094562839905

Roger Federer missed 46% of the shots he took in his career. A decent professional baseball player fails 7 out of every 10 times they're at bat. Michael Jordan missed thousands of shots in his career.

Elite sports - like most of life - involves routine failure. You're not going to eliminate failure even if you tried.

The same is true of relationships. And yet we tell ourselves silly stories about things needing to feel perfect, that if we're arguing or if we have different personalities, we should think about breaking up.

Instead, Matt and Graham explore how to lean in to relationship imperfections, and how they can actually help a relationship thrive and grow.

How do you know if you're with the right person?

How do you know whether you should ask them to marry you?

Charles Darwin, that beacon of rationality, took a very logical approach to his decision to marry his cousin, Emma Wedgwood, making a list of all the pros and cons of getting married.

The results are hilarious. But simply trusting our gut doesn't work either. So what should we do?

Graham and Matt work their way through this tricky ground in today's episode based on this Psychology Today blogpost:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/get-some-help/202504/is-a-wife-is-better-than-a-dog-the-basis-for-a-good-marriage