Somebody says something to you. On the surface it sounds fine. Almost like a compliment.

Then your stomach does that thing.

WAYMENT! Was that shade?

Season 2 opens with the question every Black woman in business has asked herself, and then talked herself out of asking.

I share 3 stories. One I had to decode. One I didn't have to decode at all. And one where I chucked dueces.

There's no HR department in your business. You're it. So you're going to have to decide.

Ready to stop performing?

Start With Self is a self-guided identity process. Six modules, one weekend. Go back to who you were before the degrees, before corporate, before you learned how to shrink. Introductory rate: $97 → mellynated.com/self

Got a story? I know I'm not the only one. Come tell it on Substack, where we go deeper on every episode: substack.com/@mellynated

Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLp4tHH05phcnjPgkXdhP1uDtcFaydNPbz

More: codeswitchrebellion.com

Your identity is the strategy.

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Timestamps:

1:01 Was that shade?

2:05 What a microaggression actually is

4:40 Why entrepreneurs have it different

6:08 "You like to question people"

9:56 When they villainize your superpower

12:47 "Your hair gives beach vibes"

14:19 Braids are not seasonal

17:08 When it's bigger than a micro

19:50 The resignation

21:15 "Educate me" is not your job

22:30 Clock it, correct it, or get the hell on

27:06 What eating it actually costs

You've heard Mel talk about stopping the performance. But what does it actually look like when you do?

In this episode, Mel sits down with career development and leadership coach Torriel Harris for a conversation that gets real about what happened when two Black women decided to stop code switching in their businesses, their branding, and how they show up every single day.

Links:

Torriel's Command the Room, Sis Program: torrielharris.net/ctrs

TikTok about President of Heritage Foundation: tiktok.com/t/ZP8pSQgt6/

Book a Digital Brand Audit: mellynated.com/digitalbrandaudit

Join the rebellion on Substack: substack.com/@mellynated

Subscribe to the YouTube channel: youtube.com/@melanieldenny

Be a Codeswitch Rebellion guest for season 2: mellynated.com/podcast

Timestamps:

0:00 — Introduction & Guest Overview

1:06 — Show Intro

1:45 — Welcome, Torriel Harris

2:17 — Torriel's Work & Why She Chose It

2:52 — Torriel's Journey: New York, California & Back

5:39 — How Her Business Was Born

6:13 — Fear of Niching Down to Black & Brown Women

7:53 — The Business Coach Who Pushed White Male Role Models

9:05 — Dealing With Trolls & Staying in Your Lane

10:12 — The Stats: Promotion Disparities for Women of Color

12:52 — The Movement to Get 1,000 Black & Brown Women Promoted 1

4:03 — Torriel's Personal Journey of Self-Acceptance

15:08 — Rejecting White Standards of Professionalism

16:15 — The Anti-Racist Art Center That Changed Everything

18:32 — Redefining What Professionalism Actually Means

21:17 — "Professionally Dope" — Knowing Your Zone of Genius

22:54 — Authentic Marketing: What You See Is What You Get

24:35 — The Layoff & The Journey Back to Self

27:26 — Self-Acceptance & Personal Branding as Identity Work

33:22 — Torriel's Program: Command the Room Sis

35:32 — Stop Downplaying Your Greatness

37:08 — Black Women Carry the Weight of the World

38:18 — Black Women as Catalysts for Change (The TikTok)

39:23 — Own Your Accomplishments

40:28 — Wrap Up & Season 2 Preview

You've been rewriting the same email. Tweaking the same post. Waiting until it's ready.

But what if ready never comes?

In this episode, Mel gets into the lie we've all been sold about perfection, and why the standard you've been chasing was never about excellence in the first place.

Links:

Book a Digital Brand Audit: mellynated.com/digitalbrandaudit

Join the rebellion on Substack: substack.com/@mellynated

Subscribe to the YouTube channel: youtube.com/@melanieldenny

Timestamps:

Introduction: The Myth of Perfection (00:00:00)

The Impossibility of Perfection (00:01:20)

The Root of Perfectionism (00:02:27)

Seeking Acceptance Through Perfection (00:03:33)

Digital Brand Audit Promotion (00:04:04)

Client Story: The Professional Organizer (00:04:42)

What We're Really Striving For (00:06:00)

Authenticity is the Closest Thing to Perfection (00:07:06) polished.

A Call to Action: Stop Overthinking (00:08:23)

Personal Story: Overcoming Speaking Insecurities (00:09:32)

Conclusion: Serve Those Who Need You (00:11:38)