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  • The Faculty (1999): Aliens On The Football Field!
    2026/10/03

    School in the late 90's was a TIME, especially for the kids at Harrington High School. Usually, the teachers are all just going through the motions, but this year, they're...different? Did this school actually get the funding they've been begging for since Freshman year?! And why's everyone downing so much water all of a sudden??

    We have no clue what's happening (mostly because we were in the back of the classroom sleeping), but we're gonna try to give a thorough review of the 1999 Robert Rodriguez classic teen sci-fi horror flick THE FACULTY!

    And since everyone is all of a sudden so obsessed with water, we decided to try a age old recipe from DEEP within grandma's receipt book, a water pie!

    But this water pie has a twist....it GLOWS RADIOACTIVE GREEN UNDER FLORESCENT LIGHT! You gotta see it (and taste it) for yourself! Head to our Substack for the recipe...and don't let the principal see you!

    What teen horror film is your favorite?? Let us know in the comments!

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    53 分
  • Weapons (2025): Hey! Auntie! Leave Them Kids Alone!
    2026/09/25

    It's 8pm on a school night, you got all us crammed in this auditorium, at this glorified Town Hall or whatever it is, and NO ONE CAN TELL US WHERE OUR KIDS ARE?! Was this some crazy overnight school camping trip that I didn't get the Parent Consent Form for??

    We're gonna get to the bottom of this missing children case when we give our thorough review of Zach Cregger's supernatural horror mystery WEAPONS (2025)!

    And since all the third graders just...vanished...I supposed we'll have to enjoy this delicious platter of loaded hot dogs and potato chips by ourselves! Can't let it all go to waste, right? Check out the video of our spread, and then grill up some dogs for yourself!


    What horror movie involving kids was top-tier for you? Let us know in the comments!

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    47 分
  • The Craft (1996): The Curse of the California Witch Coven!
    2026/09/11

    Let's face it...high school sorta sucks. Teachers are more strict, bullies are more menacing, lunch is less exciting, and worse...no nap time OR recess (and Gym doesn't count).

    And if all that wasn't irritating enough, we're not at all equipped to deal with TEEN WITCHES! That was NOT on the First Day Orientation Sheet.

    We're gonna brave the halls of this L.A. high school anyway, and try not to get caught up in any spells when we review the quintessential 1996 supernatural high school horror film The Craft!

    And our home room snack of choice? A gorgeous and decadent blackberry galette that's as rich and flavorful as it is sinister! I snatched a piece from Home Ec. when the teacher wasn't looking, but you can grab the recipe from our official Substack page and make one for yourself!


    If YOU had magical powers back in high school, what would you have used them for? Let us know in the comments section!

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    44 分
  • Cooties (2014): Fort Chicken Elementary Is Under Attack!
    2026/09/04

    Welcome back to school, kids! That's right, summer's basically over, back to the rat race. And to celebrate this occasion, we're heading to Fort Chicken Elementary to give our review of the hilarious infected flick Cooties (2014)!


    And we can't study hard without a good meal! Today we're serving up delicious homemade chicken nuggets! Seasoned perfectly with a side of aji verde sauce! It's green, it's mean, it's slightly obscene! You wanna bite?? Head over to the Substack to grab the recipe!


    What's the FUNNIEST zombie film in your opinion?? Let us know in the comments!

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    28 分
  • Friday the 13th (1980): The Camp Slasher Massacre Film That Started It All!
    2026/08/29

    Grab your hitchhiking gear! We're heading to New Jersey! Some camp called....."Camp Crystal Lake"....sounds pretty chill. See how it all plays out when we review the original summer camp slasher Friday the 13th (1980)!

    And our snack for the trip? How about a deep, chocolatey S'Mores Tart, complete with a butter graham cracker crust and a sticky sweet marshmallow frosted top. It's deeper than Crystal Lake itself! Head over to our Substack to get the recipe!

    Which Friday the 13th film was YOUR favorite?? Let us know in the comments!

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    43 分
  • Sleepaway Camp (1983): Tight Shorts, Long Stares, Quick Kills
    2026/08/20

    Summer's upon us, so let's head over to Camp Arawak for some fun in the sun! Nothing says "Summer Camp in the 80's" like side ponytails, guys wearing shorts that don't even cover their thighs, and of course...unexplained deaths! What could be more fun??? We'll save you a seat on the bus when we review Robert Kiltzik's 1983 summer camp kill fest Sleepaway Camp! Don't forget to head over to the Substack to read all about our delicious Elote Corn Dip! Perfect for late nights when you're cowering in your bunk, praying you're not next! Grab a bag of tortilla chips and DIG IN!


    What's YOUR favorite camp slasher flick?? Let us know in the comments!

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    37 分
  • MIDSOMMAR (2019): Friends, Flowers, Festivals, and Fire!
    2026/08/13

    Next time you take a trip to a foreign country, you better put some respect on that country's name and their customs and traditions, or else you might winding up BECOMING part of those customs and traditions! Here's our review of Ari Aster's beautifully horrifying folk horror film MIDSOMMAR! Before you get settled in for this wild ride, make sure to head over to our Substack to get a good look at the lovely fruit and cheese plate, and then make yourself one, because nothing says ritualistic sacrifice like fresh apples, crisp crackers, and bold cheese!


    What part of MIDSOMMAR was the hardest to watch for YOU?? Let us know in the comments!

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    1 時間 41 分
  • THE HILLS HAVE EYES (2006) Review: Don't Stop For Gas
    2026/08/06

    Next time you decide to do a cross country road trip, just remember that not every shortcut is worth taking! This week we're reviewing the terrifying 2006 remake of The Hills Have Eyes and also devouring some bloody delicious chicken wings! Check it out, and then head over to our Substack so you can try these "blood"-drenched wings yourself!


    Which did YOU prefer...the ORIGINAL The Hills Have Eyes (1977), or the remake?

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    36 分