Episode 11 — Holding The Journey Together: The Emotional Foundation Of A Surrogacy Journey

Kicking off a new series, Kayla and Gabby sit down with Rachel Goldberg, a licensed therapist specializing in infertility and third-party reproduction, for a candid look at the mental health side of surrogacy — a conversation timed to a major shift at RO: every surrogate and intended parent now works with one dedicated therapist from psych evaluation through the entire journey, rather than a one-time screening.

Rachel walks through what a psychological evaluation actually involves and why it exists for both sides, not just to protect intended parents, but to make sure the gestational carrier truly understands what she's taking on, has a stable support system, and is entering the process for the right reasons. She's candid about gray areas that surrogates often worry will disqualify them, like a past prescription for anxiety or depression, explaining that seeking help is a green flag, not a red one, and that transparency lets her team work through most things rather than treat them as automatic dealbreakers.

The conversation moves into territory rarely discussed openly: the emotional whiplash of postpartum after a surrogacy delivery, when a surrogate who has been the center of everyone's attention suddenly goes home without a baby and without the check-ins; how unprocessed grief can surface as guilt or confusion; and the particular heartbreak of surrogates who want to carry again but no longer qualify, medically or otherwise. Rachel offers real guidance for naming and moving through that grief rather than pushing it aside.

In this episode:

• Why RO now assigns every surrogate and intended parent one dedicated therapist for the full journey, not just an intake screening
• What actually happens in a psych evaluation, and why it exists to protect the surrogate as much as the intended parents
• Why a past mental health diagnosis or medication isn't an automatic disqualifier, and how transparency changes the outcome
• Navigating conflict and misunderstanding between surrogates and intended parents through a neutral, professional lens
• The postpartum emotional drop after delivery, and why "closing the chapter" on repeat surrogacy is its own kind of grief

It's a warm, reassuring window into the support system now built into every RO match — a fitting way to open a series about holding the journey together.

Episode 10 — Our Team: Taking This Journey With You: Meet Brittany, Our Surrogate Outreach Coordinator

Kayla is joined by Brittany, Reproductive Options' Surrogate Outreach and Engagement Coordinator, whose path to the role runs through two surrogacy journeys of her own and a genuinely unlikely origin story with Kayla: the two met through a breastmilk donation group, of all things, after Kayla's supply dropped and Brittany, a stranger at the time, pumped for her newborn. Kayla's Reproductive Options branding on her car sparked a conversation, and Brittany, who'd already completed one surrogacy journey elsewhere, eventually matched with RO for her second — a single embryo transfer that split into twins.

Brittany describes her role as the first line of education for women exploring surrogacy, long before intake or an application: answering questions in surrogacy Facebook groups and on social platforms, offering a genuinely supportive presence in spaces she and Kayla both describe as often "muddy," and quietly steering obvious non-matches away out of kindness rather than sales pressure. Her guiding rule, straight from the job description Kayla wrote for the role: no one should walk away from a conversation with that "ick" feeling.

That mission is personal. Brittany's first surrogacy, with a different agency, left her feeling like just another transaction — a rigid, non-negotiable benefits package, lower pay for living outside California, and intended parents asking if she'd do it again before she'd even finished processing the first journey. She swore she was done with surrogacy for good, until meeting Kayla showed her a completely different model: real support with no expectation attached, which ultimately brought her back for a second journey, and now has her considering a third.

The two also dig into the predatory tactics Brittany warns candidates about, like agencies that ask surrogates and intended parents to confirm a match live on the call, on the spot, and "VIP" pay-to-jump-the-list matching packages, contrasting them with RO's no-pressure model, its intentionally small and tightly gated private support group, and the guidebook Brittany hands out to nearly everyone she talks to, surrogate or intended parent.

In this episode:

• How a chance breastmilk donation turned into Brittany's path back to surrogacy with RO
• What outreach and engagement actually looks like day to day, from her "brain book" to social platform check-ins
• Red flags to watch for in agencies and independent journeys alike
• Why RO keeps its surrogate community small and gated on purpose
• Brittany's advice: choose an agency, or a path, for who they are, not just what they offer

Episode 9 — Our Team: Taking This Journey With You: Meet Jenn, Our Intended Parent Intake & Matching Coordinator

Kayla introduces listeners to Jenn, Reproductive Options' Intended Parent Intake and Matching Coordinator, who brings a perspective the rest of the team doesn't have: she's walked the intended-parent path herself, matching with an egg donor after facing diminished ovarian reserve. That lived experience shapes how she leads intended parents through what she calls a process built on both "operational rigor and emotional grounding" — because by the time most people reach surrogacy, they've already been through years of failed cycles, loss, and exhaustion.

Jenn walks through what actually happens on the intended-parent side from the very first intake form: a consultation call to figure out which candidate qualities really matter versus an unrealistic wishlist pulled from clinic guidelines, ASRM standards, Facebook groups, and well-meaning friends all at once; clinic pre-approval of a surrogate's medical records before any match call happens, so nobody's time gets wasted; and full transparency on cost, with an itemized breakdown that includes contingencies most agencies bury or omit entirely, like C-section fees, multiple transfer costs, or a split-twins pregnancy. Kayla and Jenn are candid about why RO deliberately estimates costs on the higher end rather than the lower end many competitors use to look more attractive upfront — the goal is never handing intended parents a surprise bill at the end of the journey.

The conversation also busts a common myth: intended parents often assume they need a surrogate based in California, but Jenn explains that plenty of other states, Illinois and Missouri among them, are just as surrogacy-friendly, and RO evaluates pre-birth order feasibility for each intended parent's specific situation nationwide. They also cover why RO doesn't run a waitlist the way many agencies do, some stretching six to eighteen months or longer: capped caseloads mean intended parents are only onboarded once there's real matching capacity, rather than being strung along with deposits and unqualified candidates just to feel like progress is happening.

In this episode:

• What the intended-parent intake and matching process actually looks like, step by step
• Why RO intentionally estimates costs high instead of low, and what's usually hidden in a lower quote elsewhere
• The California myth, and which other states are quietly great for surrogacy
• Why RO doesn't run an intended-parent waitlist, and what that protects you from
• Why having a team member with her own intended-parent journey changes how that side of the process feels

Coming up next in the Our Team series: the extended professionals who hold every journey together from the outside — escrow, attorneys, clinics, and mental health support.

Episode 8 — Our Team: Taking This Journey With You: Inside Case Management with Rashelle

Kayla is joined by Rashelle, one of Reproductive Options' case managers, for an episode that starts with her own surrogacy story — and it's a rough one. Rashelle's first journey, back in 2016, involved a three-embryo transfer she was talked into by a large San Diego agency (something RO would never do now); it failed. Her second journey, with a new boutique agency and an intended mother she now calls her "soul sister," resulted in twins — but the agency itself provided zero support throughout, leaving Rashelle and her intended parents to lean entirely on each other. Things got worse after delivery: Rashelle ended up in the ICU with 14 blood transfusions, and the agency's only response was showing up with flowers — a visit her nurse cut short because they weren't family and flowers aren't allowed in the ICU. She never heard from them again.

That experience is exactly what pushed Rashelle toward case management herself. She traces her winding path from training to be a teacher, to being recruited into her first case management role through a Facebook post, to loving the work so much she carried 30 to 50 cases at once, unpaid overtime and all, until she was let go for being "too slow."

She found Reproductive Options through a job posting, submitted her application from SeaWorld with her kids in tow, and has been there ever since.

Kayla and Rashelle talk through what real support looks like day to day: reaching out to every surrogate right after match, meeting each person exactly where they are (text all day for some, a single email for others), showing up in person to appointments for local surrogates, and holding space for both the hard days and the joyful ones. Rashelle's signature line to her surrogates: there's no such thing as TMI.

The episode closes with a preview of what's ahead — a new partnership with Rachel Goldberg, who conducts most of RO's psychological evaluations and will now provide ongoing monthly mental health check-ins throughout every surrogate's journey, something Rashelle says she wishes she'd had during her own. Kayla also previews where the Our Team series goes next, moving beyond RO's internal staff to the extended team that supports every journey: legal, escrow, and mental health professionals.

In this episode:

• Rashelle's own surrogacy journey, including a traumatic delivery and an agency that disappeared when she needed them most
• Why her path into case management started with a Facebook post and an unsustainable 30-to-50-case caseload
• What personalized, "meet them where they are" support actually looks like at Reproductive Options
• A first look at RO's new ongoing mental health support with Rachel Goldberg
• What's coming next in the Our Team series: the legal, escrow, and mental health professionals who round out a surrogate's support system

Episode 7 — Our Team: Taking This Journey With You: Inside Case Management with Liz

Kayla is joined by Liz, one of Reproductive Options' case managers, who brings a rare dual perspective: she's not only managed dozens of surrogacy journeys professionally, she lived four of her own, carrying five babies total (including a set of twins she jokes she wouldn't recommend). Liz walks through what case management actually covers at RO — everything from the moment a surrogate is matched through about a month postpartum, including scheduling medical screening travel, psychological evaluations, monitoring appointments, medication orders, and escrow, all so the surrogate never has to chase down logistics herself the way Liz had to during her own under-supported first journey.

The conversation dives deep into RO's birth planning process — detailed questionnaires covering who's in the delivery room, whether photos are welcome, cord banking, feeding plans, and even small details like whether the baby gets a pacifier or bath before the parents arrive — all coordinated directly with the hospital ahead of time so nobody's improvising on delivery day. Liz also opens up about her own first surrogacy experience — no hospital check-in, no follow-up for weeks, and eventually a call from her old agency asking her to help chase down a bill — and how that shaped the case manager she became. The two also talk through RO's manageable caseloads, the always-reachable phone tree, and RO's newer independent case management option for surrogates who matched outside of an agency.

In this episode:

• What case management actually covers, from match through postpartum
• Why RO's birth planning questionnaires exist, and the details most people forget to plan for
• Liz's own surrogacy story, and the unsupported delivery that shaped how she cares for her surrogates now
• Why caseload size matters, and how RO keeps case managers proactive instead of stretched thin
• Advice for surrogates: it's your journey too, and it's always okay to advocate for what you need

Episode 6 — Our Team: Taking This Journey With You: Inside Intake with Katy Brown

Season 2, episode 6. This episode shifts gears from surrogate stories to pull back the curtain on the process itself. Kayla is joined by Katy Brown, Reproductive Options' GC Intake Coordinator, who brings both professional expertise and personal history to the conversation — Katy was a surrogate herself roughly a decade ago, after a "why not me" moment that came out of nowhere even though she and her husband felt done having kids.

Katy walks through what actually happens from the moment someone takes RO's video-led quiz on the homepage through matching: the full application, medical and mental health history review, the surrogate profile and photo guidelines (a bathroom selfie won't cut it), third-party medical records review through Gather Records, and the final interview where sensitive matching preferences like termination stance, vaccination status, and location or travel get worked through honestly and without judgment.

Kayla and Katy also unpack two new additions to RO's benefit package: a short-term life insurance policy that now kicks in immediately at match, closing a gap during the early medication window before the longer 18-month, $500,000–$750,000 policy takes effect, and standard monthly mental health check-ins built into every journey at no extra cost to the surrogate. The two also get into RO's approach to matching itself — building each match around what the surrogate actually wants rather than working off a long intended-parent waitlist — and Katy shares the surprisingly relatable moment from her own match, nearly passing on a profile because the intended parents lived in France, before one Zoom call changed her mind completely.

In this episode:

• What actually happens step by step from application to match, straight from the person who runs intake
• Two new benefit updates: match-day life insurance and built-in monthly mental health support
• Why photos make or break a surrogate profile, and what actually works
• Termination stance, vaccination preferences, and why there's no wrong answer — just the right match
• Why it's always okay to say no to a first match call
• Katy's own path from surrogate to industry professional, and her personal match story

Before the Match: When It Doesn't Work Out — Mallory's Story

Season 1, episode 5. In this episode, Kayla sits down with Mallory, a two-time matched surrogate from Atlanta who, despite two full journeys, medical screenings, and multiple embryo transfers, never carried a pregnancy to delivery. It's one of the most emotional conversations of the series, and Kayla says as much going in — Mallory has been part of Reproductive Options since its earliest days, back when Kayla was personally her case manager and the company was still a one-woman operation.

Mallory walks through her first match in detail: a pregnancy that looked promising on early testing but turned out to be a pregnancy of unknown location, requiring a D&C that found nothing, followed by a round of methotrexate that pushed her timeline back three months. A second transfer with the same couple failed outright, and when the intended mother unexpectedly became pregnant herself, the match quietly fell apart under the weight of a newborn, a C-section recovery, and the uncertainty of a second ongoing pregnancy at once.

She then describes her second match, with a new intended father, including a positive test that turned out to be a chemical pregnancy — and the sting of learning he'd broken the match before she'd even had a chance to process the loss herself. Throughout, she and Kayla reflect on what it really means to be "committed to the process" rather than just the outcome, and why every intake conversation about the steps of surrogacy should also be honest about everything that can go wrong along the way.

The episode also carries an almost unbelievable thread: how Mallory first learned about surrogacy through a neighbor who, it turns out, once carried twins from an egg donation cycle Kayla did years earlier — a small-world coincidence neither of them realized until they were already mid-conversation about it.

In this episode:

• The reality of a pregnancy of unknown location, a D&C, and methotrexate treatment
• Why a smooth first transfer isn't guaranteed, even when everything looks right medically
• What it means to lose a match through no fault of your own — twice
• Why Reproductive Options wants surrogates committed to the process, not just the result
• A wild coincidence linking Mallory, her neighbor, and one of Kayla's own donor cycles

Mallory never delivered — but as she puts it herself, she's still a surrogate. This is her story.

Episode 4: Talking Money — Compensation, Boundaries, and Building a Future with Heather & Danielle

Season 1, episode 4. Kayla sits down with real-life couple Heather and Danielle, who between them have completed four surrogacy journeys, for the show's most requested and most taboo topic: money. Danielle, a three-time surrogate, walks through exactly what she was paid on each of her journeys — from $54,000 on her first journey in 2020 through an agency, to roughly $69,000 on an independent match, up to $120,000 on her most recent journey with Reproductive Options, including an insurance stipend she didn't even know to ask for the first time around. Heather, who swore she'd never carry for anyone until she watched Danielle do it, shares her own independent journey and how the two of them turned surrogacy compensation into real financial change: paying off $63,000 in student loan debt, opening investment accounts for all three of their kids, and building their own retirement savings.

The conversation doesn't shy away from the judgment surrogates face for talking openly about pay. Heather and Danielle push back on the idea that wanting fair compensation cheapens the decision to carry for someone else, arguing instead that surrogates should never be afraid to ask for what they're worth, that compensation should be negotiated through a lawyer rather than directly with intended parents, and that walking away from a mismatched offer just means the right match hasn't come along yet. They also get practical: how they mapped out exactly where every dollar would go before they ever signed a contract, and why skipping that planning is how surrogates end up finishing a journey with nothing to show for it.

In this episode:

• Real compensation numbers across three journeys — agency, independent, and Reproductive Options
• Why it's okay to do this for the money, and why that doesn't diminish the heart behind it
• How Heather and Danielle turned their compensation into debt payoff, investments, and their kids' futures
• Setting your own fees, working through a lawyer, and not settling for less than you're worth
• Financial planning advice for surrogates before they ever sign a contract

Money is one of the most taboo topics in surrogacy — this episode brings it fully into the open.