Hoovering, is a self-serving manipulative trait that, yes, is named after the vacuum cleaner company. After discarding a relationship, narcissists often hoover to lure that person -- often a sibling -- back into the fold. Those who hoover have several tricks in their bag -- guilt, threats, illness, pity, future-faking, triangulation, smearing. Typically, someone who hoovers engages in a sickening cycle of intimacy and discarding. This is not an authentic relationship; it is opportunistic or transactional behavior. Even though we seek belonging, this relationship pattern is tedious, draining, and disillusioning. This insightful episode explores hoovering and how to avoid getting sucked in when a sibling engages in this cunning and controlling behavior.
Ali-John's Public Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/5minutetherapy
Join my Private Facebook Group. and get a free gift when you answer 3 questions. https://www.facebook.com/groups/688926101896419/
For informative articles on sibling estrangement, please visit http://www.siblingestrangement.com/blog
I also host a Sibling Estrangement Support Group on Zoom: https://siblingestrangement.com/groups/
For more info on my workshops on rumination and navigating the stages of grief with sibling estrangement, please visit: https://siblingestrangement.com/groups/
Ali-John is starting up the Wellness Rewards Club in January 2026! This will be a chance to be part of a club, through a YouTube membership, where you get some premium strategies for managing sibling estrangement.
Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@SiblingEstrangement
To buy Fern's book on Sibling Estrangement: https://www.lakeforestbookstore.com/book/9780525561699
Link to the workbook Sibling Estrangement Journal on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BLLTT6SJ#SalesRank
To connect with Author Fern Schumer Chapman, please visit her website at: https://www.fernschumerchapman.com
Or visit her Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/FernSchumerChapmanAuthorPage
You can read Fern's Sibling Estrangement articles on Psychology Today here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/contributors/fern-schumer-chapman
Like what you hear? Feel free to donate to help us continue to make quality content: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=X9VW7VYD864TG