They said they were managing the finances — because you weren't good with money. That every purchase had to go through them.

But somehow, there was always money for what they wanted. They made you feel like a child asking for an allowance — in your own home. And the moment you tried to leave, you realized you had nothing. Because they had made sure of it.

That wasn't financial stress. That was financial control.

This Thursday episode, Dr. Kerry McAvoy reads from your stories — real accounts from people who lived inside financially controlling relationships — to break down what financial abuse actually is and what the 'broke' narcissist tactic looks like from the inside.

In this episode:

• Why narcissists use money as a tool of surveillance and control
• The 'broke' performance: how narcissists claim poverty while draining your resources
• How financial abuse creates a dependency trap designed to make leaving feel impossible
• Why survivors so often exit these relationships having to start over in debt, isolated, and exhausted
• What financial recovery really requires

Key Moments:

00:00 — Caught in the middle: the child who can't take sides
02:05 — "My worst enemy, but also my best friend": love with conditions
03:39 — When the sensitive child becomes the target
05:07 — The gaze that builds a self — and the one that breaks it
06:36 — "I never said that": memory gaslighting and siblings who stop speaking
08:55 — Protecting your kids: hypervigilance, loyalty binds, and staying regulated

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

• The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
• First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
• Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Dr. Kerry!

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• Facebook

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice, nor does listening create a doctor-patient or therapist-client relationship. If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call 911 or contact the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988 (US/Canada).

Your child comes home from a visit with the other parent guarded. Repeating things they couldn't have come up with on their own. Now they’re looking at you differently.

That's not just "divorce being hard." That's a smear campaign — and your narcissistic ex has recruited your own children to run it.

This week, Dr. Josh Davis — neuroscientist, psychologist, and author of The Difference That Makes a Difference — joins Dr. Kerry McAvoy to break down exactly how narcissistic exes weaponize children in their smear campaigns, and what you can do to protect your relationship with your kids without playing the narcissist's game.

In this episode:

• Why narcissistic exes target children in their smear campaigns and what they're really trying to accomplish
• The 3 signs your child is being used as a messenger or weapon against you
• How to respond when your child repeats the narcissist's narrative
• The one mistake most co-parents make that actually deepens the alienation

Exclusive Podcast Extra Segment

Want to go deeper?

Paid Substack subscribers get exclusive access to Dr. Davis's most powerful technique — a simple mental shift that lets you step outside the chaos of a difficult co-parenting moment, see it clearly, and stop reacting

🔒 Become a paid subscriber and unlock your access today: https://substack.com/@breakingfreenarcabuse

DR. JOSH DAVIS is a neuroscientist, psychologist, and author of The Difference That Makes a Difference. His work helps parents build stronger connections with their children using tools from Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) and neuroscience.

Website

Book: The Difference That Makes the Difference: NLP and the Science of Positive Change

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

• The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
• First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
• Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Dr. Kerry!

• Youtube
• Instagram
• TikTok
• Facebook

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice, nor does listening create a doctor-patient or therapist-client relationship. If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call 911 or contact the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988 (US/Canada).

If you can name the patterns and see the behaviors, have you wondered why do you still feel so stuck?

This week I'm sharing an episode from Renee Swanson of the Covert Narcissism Podcast — a feed swap I wanted to bring straight to this community. Renee unpacks what she calls "hitting the wall": the moment you can no longer live the lie in a covert narcissistic relationship, when you can't keep pretending that you're fine, that your family is fine, when it simply isn't.

Renee Swanson, the host, walks through the two paths that lead there — the slow erosion that wears you down mentally, emotionally, and physically, and the sudden crack that changes everything in an instant — and what actually happens inside you when you reach that point: the numbness, the strange relief, the self-doubt. Then she gets practical about the conversation itself: what you're really trying to do when you name your reality out loud, the responses to expect (DARVO, minimizing, tears, an eerie calm), and how to stay grounded when it goes sideways.

If any of this is your life right now, please be gentle with yourself as you listen — and reach out to a trusted person or a domestic-abuse resource if you need support. Find more of Renee's work and her coaching at covertnarcissism.com.

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

• The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
• First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
• Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Dr. Kerry!

• Youtube
• Instagram
• TikTok
• Facebook

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice, nor does listening create a doctor-patient or therapist-client relationship. If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call 911 or contact the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988 (US/Canada).