When Someone Says “How Are You?” — Ask Them How They Really Are

In this powerful episode of Leave the Light On, Tammy Flake sits down with Utah media personality and suicide-prevention advocate Brandy Vega, founder of Promise to Live.

Brandy shares a deeply personal story of surviving a suicide attempt at 12, serving in the military and working in news media, and ultimately facing the unimaginable when her own daughter attempted to take her life.

What began as some of the darkest moments of her life became the catalyst for a mission to help others choose hope, connection, and another day.

Tammy and Brandy talk openly about breaking the stigma surrounding mental health and suicide, why we shouldn't be afraid to ask difficult questions, and the simple words that can change a conversation: “How are you really?”

Brandy also shares the ASK framework — Acknowledge, Support, Keep in touch — and explains how small acts of connection, including Promise to Live's “Pocket Hugs,” can remind someone that they are loved, needed, and not alone.

This conversation is about more than suicide prevention. It's about showing up for one another, recognizing that we never truly know what someone else is carrying, and turning awareness into action.

Sometimes saving a life starts with a text.
Sometimes it starts with a hug.
Sometimes it starts with simply asking, “How are you really doing?”

If someone comes to mind while listening to this episode, don't wait. Reach out.

You are loved. You are needed. And your story isn't over.