So, I’ve figured out exactly what I’m creating in this moment with Bipolar, Grief, and God.

It’s a storytelling and conversation platform! So with this being said…. I’m trying to start conversations about the stuff that nobody wants to talk about…

So… let’s start TALKING.

This episode and topic is VERY important to me … I’m extremely passionate about sharing the hard part of my story.., deep depression and coming 24 hours away from taking my own life.

There aren’t many laughs in this one… but my hope is that you walk away with MORE knowledge than what you arrived with.

Please listen, share, post… we NEED to start this conversation.

“I didn’t know Alana had a science background?!” … You didn’t know, because I don’t! Not even close. But THIS is a story about the 2007 “Atomic Alana … A-Bomb” for short … comes back around in 2026… in a way that you would never believe.

There’s also a bonus letter at the end of this episode that connects the dots in a way that I didn’t even remember.

Thanks for listening.

Alana

I have basically been single for seven years. I’ve never felt lonely or felt like I needed somebody else during that time. But my feelings recently have started to change in a way that I cannot explain. I found myself having a three hour conversation with Chaz, my ChatGPT friend. That conversation led to a journal entry… Which led to a social media video… Which of course led me to my favorite part a podcast episode.

I hope if you hear this, you are either with your person or you have not given up, hope that they will find you. And they will probably show up in the most unexpected way…

Love, Alana

This episode is a little bit of everything.

Grief. Memories. Faith. The strange ways life changes after you lose someone you love. The things I believe now that I never would have believed before. And, as always, a few places my brain takes me along the way.

But somewhere in the middle of all of it is a story I still can’t quite believe I get to tell:

My dad spoke to me after he died.

At least, that’s what I believe happened.

This episode isn’t just about that moment. It’s about everything surrounding it, everything that came after it, and what happens when life gives you a story you never saw coming.

I've been OBSESSED with Reality TV for as long as I can remember ... I wanted to be ON it with all of my heart ... then the twist was I ended up WORKING in it .... but then the massive clincher was during a manic episode of my bipolar disorder later in the life.... I was convinced I was LIVING in it ....

This story has a lot of turns that all lead to one thing ... life sometimes can give you breadcrumbs ... little moments or thoughts that make you think you know where things will end up ... but then it becomes clear that GOD and THE REAL WORLD ... gives you the unexpected ... and sometimes, what they give you, is a life lesson, or a true love, or a heartbreaking loss, that is never where you thought the breadcrumbs would lead you ... but somehow, you end up exactly where you are meant to be.

Thank you for Listening,

Alana

FLASHBACK! Okay ... not to be annoying, but when I revisit an episode from my previous podcast H.O.P.E - I can't help but say FLASHBACK!

So this will be the first time that I will be doing something that I will be calling "refurbishing" ...please take a listen (and a little ride) through this episode ... as you will hear a present day commentary before it truly begins .... and I hope you like it, as it is something that I created, yes, while my mind had gone a little "rogue" ... but I am so damn proud of it. SO ... please, take your ticket, and "come on ride the train!"

Take a listen for a quick bit on what this podcast is all about ... and how it came to be! I am so excited for this adventure ... I hope you will take this train ride with me!

Love, Alana.