エピソード

  • At a Total Loss, an interview about grief podcasting with Katherine Lazar, Brody's Mom
    2026/05/04

    Your favorite baby loss podcast hosts in the same place? You bet! In this crossover episode, we’re joined by Katherine Lazar, host of At a Total Loss podcast, to talk about what it looks like to live with child loss both in the early days and years later.

    We get into how each of us found our way to podcasting, the role of community when everything falls apart, and the weird, complicated evolution of grief over time. From recording episodes in the depths of despair to… not really doing that anymore, we talk honestly about what’s changed, and what hasn’t.

    Katherine lost her son Brody in 2022, and she has turned her grief into advocacy. In addition to At A Total Loss podcast, she is also the founder of LossLink -- a searchable community for real life loss mom friends -- and the author of the Stillbirth Survival Guide --available THIS WEEK on May 7th!

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    Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠aslongasimlivingpodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

    :::

    As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

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    1 時間 1 分
  • 5 Years Without Aiden
    2026/03/23

    Last week, we released an episode where Alina talked about surviving Quinn's fifth death anniversary in January. This week, check in with Judith as she just survived Aiden's. 5 years. Wow.

    xo

    Alina and Judith

    :::

    Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠aslongasimlivingpodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

    :::

    As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

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    32 分
  • 5 Years Without Quinn
    2026/03/16

    Recorded back in January, immediately after the 5th anniversary of Quinn's death. Tune in next week for thoughts from Judith about Aiden's 5th death anniversary, which just passed in early March.

    xo

    Alina and Judith

    :::

    Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠aslongasimlivingpodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

    :::

    As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

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    25 分
  • Our 2026 Horoscopes: The Journey is the Destination
    2026/01/01

    It's the most wonderful time of the year... horoscope day on As Long As I'm Living!

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    Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠!

    :::

    Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠aslongasimlivingpodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

    :::

    As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

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    20 分
  • Two Truths and No Lies
    2025/12/31

    Do you ever find yourself making small talk and... lying? But like, not lying? For example... You don't have any kids (except the dead one).

    In this episode we talk about these "context truths" and a couple of other random things! (Happy belated birthday, Judith!)

    :::

    Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠!

    :::

    Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠aslongasimlivingpodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

    :::

    As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

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    28 分
  • ily
    2025/09/22

    Families are supposed to grow, not shrink...

    In this episode, Judith discusses how it felt to take family photos without Aiden and without Aiden's dad. Her FAMILY is now only an ---ILY.

    (Also, happy birthday, Quinn. ILY.)

    :::

    Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠!

    :::

    Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠aslongasimlivingpodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

    :::

    As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.


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    21 分
  • Gender Reveal: It's A....... Disappointment
    2025/09/15

    OF COURSE we (and you) are grateful for ANY living child, whether they have XX or XY chromosomes. It's still okay to have feelings about it.

    *We know that that during pregnancy you find out biological sex, not gender, and that any child's gender identity and expression could change. HOWEVER this is the term that most are familiar with and is likely to show up in search results, so we're going with it! "Sex disappointment" is another thing entirely lol.

    :::

    Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠!

    :::

    Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠aslongasimlivingpodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

    :::

    As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

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    30 分
  • Ask ALAIL: Will I ever be happy again?
    2025/09/08

    No. And yes!

    :::

    Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠!

    :::

    Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠aslongasimlivingpodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

    :::

    As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

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    24 分