Whimsy is having a moment on the internet, and I love the meaning underneath it all. Not the performative, one-size-fits-all cottagecore type. But the permission to do things just for the fun of it.

Spinning in circles until you fall down. Going to Ireland because nothing was stopping you. Naming the stuffed rat from the Nutcracker gift shop Jean-Claude and carrying him around all night (all the old ladies loved it).

I get into the difference between impulse that expands you and impulse that's running away, the lie that being an adult means everything has to be serious, and some of the unconventional things that I do simply because it makes me happy.

You don't have to call it whimsy. But it's worth asking what you love simply because you love it.

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I've been thinking about autonomy. Remember that life is a series of choices strung together, and that you never actually needed permission to make them. I talk about choosing paths that scare you, the pixie cut you got just because you wanted to, eloping instead of doing it "the right way," and what it really means to build trust with a partner by letting them be their own person. Consequence isn't the enemy. It's just what happens after you choose.

This is your reminder that you can decide a different path at any moment.

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If your brain has ever felt too loud to live in, I hope this makes you feel a little less alone. I only know one small part of life without worry.

I was eight, living at a campground, riding my scooter down to a wash full of flowers and making up songs. That version of me had never met a worry. Everything after that is what this episode is about.

I talk about being twelve and not being able to take a full breath, and how nobody in the room knew to call it what it was. I talk about the years that followed: the eating disorder, the compulsive shopping, the drinking, and the belief underneath all of it that something was just inherently wrong with me. I talk about rock bottom at nineteen, the spiritual awakening that came out of it, and the ten years it took to get to the other side (but I'm still healing).

And I talk about the one thing that changed everything, which is learning that I am not my thoughts.

I am not a professional and I am not here to fix you. Think of this as sitting on a cozy couch while it rains outside, having a heart to heart with someone who has been there.

Buy The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself by Michael A. Singer on Amazon

Buy The Trauma of Burnout: How to Manage Your Nervous System Before It Manages You by Dr. Claire Plumbly on Amazon

Buy The Anti-Anxiety Notebook: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Other Essentials made by Therapists on Amazon

If you are struggling right now, please reach out to someone. In the US you can call or text 988 any time for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.

For eating disorder support, the National Alliance for Eating Disorders helpline is 1-866-662-1235.

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I have always been the one to throw the first punch and told myself that was a skill. Detachment. Very healthy, very evolved, right? It took me until my late twenties to admit that most of it was just hitting first so I couldn't be hit. And the thing about walking around in a suit of armor is that it delivers the exact thing it was built to prevent.

This is the episode where I try to work out how you actually let someone see you. Not whether you should, we all know we should. How. I talk about why the fear of rejection is really self-rejection. How you start with something small and watch what they do with it. And most importantly letting yourself be loved without flinching. I also make the case that we have been using the wrong word this whole time. Vulnerable comes from the Latin word for wound. Intimacy comes from the word for innermost.

If the self-worth piece of this episode hits, go back and listen to Self-worth.

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When I was ten, a book called me to a place I had never been.

Whale Song by Cheryl Kaye Tardif is out of print and I've never met anyone that's heard of it. I found it on a library shelf in the California desert, twenty years before I would step foot in the very same place it takes place.

This episode is about calling. Not the career version. The calling you cannot explain to anyone, including yourself. I talk about where the word actually comes from (a summons, a voice), how a humpback song travels farther through water than almost any sound on earth, and what it means to stand in a threshold.

We also talk about how to tell expansion from contraction in your body, why a depleted nervous system cannot give you a clean signal, and why hearing the call isn't the hard part. It's walking towards it.

You are meant to live life to the fullest.

Buy Whale Song by Cheryl Kaye Tardif on Amazon.

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There's a fear that lives underneath wanting something badly: if I want it too much, will I jinx it? Will it hurt more if I don't get it?

In this episode I'm untangling the difference between real non-attachment and what most of us are actually doing, which is pre-grieving. Bracing for a hurt that might never come. Mourning something we haven't even lost.

I'm sharing the story of a big tech job I wanted so badly it scared me, the offer I thought I had in my hands, and the rejection that sent me spiraling into questioning my own worth. It was one of the hardest blows to my confidence I've ever taken. And it taught me the thing I most want you to walk away with:

You're allowed to want things with your whole heart. You're allowed to grieve when they don't come to fruition. What's meant for you will find you, and it's still okay to cry about the things that didn't.

Wanting doesn't determine your worth. Desire isn't a problem to manage. It's one of the most beautiful, human things we get to feel, and it's showing you a map to who you really are.

Let me know what lessons desire has taught you. 🤍

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What does it take to transform? Real transformation, not the crash diet, overnight reinvention kind.

A tiny frog showed up on my third floor balcony and became the whole metaphor: tadpoles can't skip stages, they can't rush the tail dropping off, and neither can we. We talk about consistency and time as the actual secret, why the in-between feels like nothing's happening, and why growing pains mean you're closer, not behind.

If you're looking for permission to let go and let life unfold, this is your sign.

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Today we're getting vulnerable. I'm talking about feeling worthless and that hum of "not good enough" that runs under so much of what we do.

I open up about my own struggle with feeling worthless, then pick that feeling apart: where does it come from? What is the actual meaning underneath it all? And how does this tie into the nervous system?

We also get into functional worth versus intrinsic worth, why you can't logic your way out of a shame loop, and the small things that actually work to rewire this belief.

It's a reminder for me as much as anyone: you're worthy because you exist, not because of what you produce. ✨

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