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If you keep telling yourself you “just need more motivation,” the real thing holding you back may be much deeper. Shame can quietly shape the way you see yourself, what you believe you deserve, and whether you take action at all. Turning even simple goals, rest, or meaningful pursuits into something that feels nearly impossible.

In this episode, we unpack how shame interferes with the cycle of motivation, why motivation often comes after action instead of before it, and how shame-based narratives can keep you stuck in avoidance, guilt, and self-criticism. Emilia and Bianca share real client examples involving rest, career decisions, and pursuing what you actually want, while exploring how self-compassion, identity, support, and a better understanding of your needs can help you create a stronger foundation for meaningful action.

Here's a related episode that builds on today's conversation:
#521 | How to Trust Yourself and Eliminate Self-Doubt 👇

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/521-how-to-trust-yourself-and-eliminate-self-doubt/id1511831621?i=1000776557116

Learn more about:
🤝 Out of the Mud (OOTM) - "Why Change Feels So Uncomfortable (Even When You Want It)" - https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/IykObX8eR7ixJaQ-qqZogw#/registration

📆 Evolve Group Coaching - https://evolveventurestech.com/evolve-group-coaching/

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🌱 The #YouDoYou Therapy Program gives you support when and how you need it. No pressure. Just real help. Start your free 7-day trial today - https://buy.stripe.com/fZe8Avdfx8bW9gcfZc

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Show notes:

(0:00) Why motivation isn't the real problem
(1:35) Rethinking how motivation works
(3:47) What actually gets us to take action
(5:15) When shame becomes the foundation
(8:18) Building on self-compassion instead of shame
(10:35) When your to-do list becomes shame
(13:08) Why rest can feel undeserved
(15:03) How shame shuts down motivation
(16:53) Out of the Mud
(17:30) How shame quietly runs your life
(20:06) Choosing what you actually want
(23:16) Finding the story underneath your resistance
(27:22) Why shame needs outside support
(29:26) Outro

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(Stay tuned for this coming Thursday's episode!)