『247: Keeping the Bond Alive: Sara Rian on Grief, Motherhood & Healing』のカバーアート

247: Keeping the Bond Alive: Sara Rian on Grief, Motherhood & Healing

247: Keeping the Bond Alive: Sara Rian on Grief, Motherhood & Healing

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In this episode, I speak with Sara Rian, a poet, licensed therapist, sex therapist, and mother, about the deeply personal ways grief and loss have shaped her life, her relationship with motherhood, and her creative journey. Sara shares how losing her mother to suicide in 2018 transformed her poetry and became a way to process trauma, honor her grief, and maintain a connection with someone she loved. She also reflects on the profound impact of losing her oldest son and how these experiences have shaped her understanding of love, loss, and what it means to keep moving through life while carrying grief.Sara opens up about the vulnerability of writing through grief, why she eventually chose to remove her first two books from publication, and how poetry has become a way to honor the people she has lost. We explore how grief can remain part of our lives rather than simply diminish with time, why there is no single right way to experience loss, and how allowing ourselves to feel deeply can create space for healing and self-discovery. Sara also shares how her experiences have challenged cultural expectations around grief and the pressure to move on or return to normal.We delve into how loss intersects with motherhood, including Sara’s reflections on becoming a mother after losing her own mother, the generational patterns she wanted to understand before having children, and the ways grief can resurface through major life transitions. Sara shares how she continues her relationship with her mother through poetry, family rituals, and conversations with her daughters about the grandmother they never met. Our conversation explores the complexity of loving and grieving, the importance of mothering ourselves, and how we can honor those we have lost while creating new experiences and relationships for ourselves and the generations that follow.You’ll also hear about:(02:08) Sara’s journey as a therapist, mother, and poet, and how writing became part of her life(03:12) How losing her mother to suicide transformed her poetry and became a way to process trauma and grief(05:34) Why Sara chose to remove her first two poetry books and protect the vulnerability of her earliest grief(08:12) The courage it takes to share deeply personal experiences and allow others to witness our pain(10:43) How grief has become part of Sara’s identity and why she has learned to honor rather than suppress it(12:17) Challenging cultural expectations about the “right” way to grieve and move through loss(13:08) Why pain can become a portal for growth, transformation, and deeper self-awareness(15:33) How Sara’s mother’s childhood experiences shaped their conversations about motherhood and generational patterns(17:10) Becoming a mother after losing her own mother and carrying forward the parts of their relationship she wanted to preserve(22:11) How motherhood can bring new layers of grief to the surface and change our relationship with loss(28:03) Preparing for motherhood through therapy, self-reflection, and understanding the experiences that shape our choices(30:06) How different childhood experiences influence our understanding of parenting, family, and emotional connection(35:13) Why poetry has remained a consistent part of Sara’s life and how her relationship with writing continues to evolve(37:21) Releasing perfectionism and allowing creativity to become a practice of self-expression and self-care(40:25) Continuing bonds and how poetry can help us maintain a relationship with loved ones who have died(42:05) Keeping her mother’s memory alive for her daughters through family stories, rituals, and the name “Ladybug Grandma”(45:14) How Sara’s experiences of loss have shaped her understanding of love, motherhood, and the importance of allowing grief to exist alongside lifeDon't miss Sara's moving perspective on honoring grief, continuing our relationships with those we've lost, and rewriting the inherited beliefs that shape how we love, mother, and heal!Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, or wherever you listen to podcasts!Learn more about Sara Rian:Find Sara’s poetry books on AmazonFollow Sara on InstagramLearn more on Sara’s WebsiteFollow Dr. Gertrude:Learn more on Dr. Gertrude’s WebsiteFollow Dr. Gertrude on InstagramStay in the loop and sign up to Dr. Gertrude’s SubstackOrder Dr. Gertrude’s new book “Rewrite the Mother Code”
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