If you feel that sense that there is something missing from your life, some gap between who you are on the inside and who you are on the outside - then this is the book for you.

This is, as the title says, not actually a book about Benedict Cumberbatch.

In fact, it's a book about women and what we love, about what happens to women's passions after we leave adolescence and how the space for joy in our lives is squeezed ever smaller as we age, and why. More importantly, it's about what happens if you subvert that narrative and simply love something like you used to.

Drawing upon her personal experience of unexpectedly falling for the British actor Benedict Cumberbatch while stuck at home with two young children, Carvan challenges the reader to stop instinctively resisting the possibility of experiencing pleasure. Hers is clarion rallying cry: find your thing, whatever it may be, and love it like your life depends on it.

Funny, intelligent, transporting and liberating, this book is a total joy.

'Winningly effervescent... an aria of joyous discovery...' Slate

'Witty, erudite and fierce in its message - that women should seek joy and find fun. Happily, this book provides both in abundance. I loved it.' Jacqueline Maley

'You know when you bite into a chocolate, and unexpectedly discover it's filled with delectable cherry kirsch that explodes into your mouth? That's this book. Original, highly entertaining, fast-paced, personal read that contains unexpected revelations at every corner. It's funny, it's smart, it's compelling. But most of all, it's a battle cry: sit up, pay attention and follow your heart and find joy. After all, our time on this earth is short. C'mon. The clock is ticking.' Ginger Gorman

'Intimate, self-deprecating ... like an Australian Caitlin Moran or Dolly Alderton ... an easy, lighthearted read about serious subject matter: feminism, passion, relationships and creativity, and owning the strength of the passions felt in childhood and adolescence.' Books+Publishing

'A surprise midlife obsession with British actor Benedict Cumberbatch provides the occasion for musings on passion, aging, and identity in this spirited debut. . . Carvan's self-aware approach wrings the absurdity out of her story to hilarious effect while touching on the realities of motherhood and fandom: ""It's not just about what we love, but how that love figures in our lives, and how it makes us feel."" The result is a weird-in-the-best-way account of self-discovery that brims with humor and insight.' Publishers Weekly, starred review

'Remember that feeling you had as a kid, when you loved things wholeheartedly, boldly, and loudly? If you feel a sense that there is something missing from your life, some gap between who you are on the inside and who you are on the outside, then this is the book for you.' Eve Rodsky, author of Find Your Unicorn Space and Fair Play

'This really isn't a book about Benedict Cumberbatch. It's about so, so much more: Losing yourself and finding yourself, oppression and emancipation; sadness and joy. Tabitha Carvan's book will make you think and make you cackle. It's the most delightful book I've read in a long time.' Melinda Wenner Moyer, author of How to Raise Kids Who Aren't Assholes

'Wonderfully fresh... Subversively important stuff.' The Chicago Tribune

'This year's most hilarious self-help book.' The Daily Mail UK

'An excellent account... It's about opening yourself to life, about treasuring your own tender heart.' The Sydney Morning Herald (Richard Glover)

'This book was better than it had any right to be. It was a totally unexpected five stars.' Feminist Book Club

'A very powerful, astonishingly incisive view on feminism and the patriarchy.' Sorta Awesome

'I love this book so, so much and I'm going to force it on every human being.' #AmWriting podcast