You Will Own Nothing: And You’ll Be Billed Monthly for the Privilege
By Kevin L. Whitworth

Welcome to the future—where you don’t own your life, you just rent it on a never-ending payment plan.

In this hilariously grim exposé, cult-favorite satirist Kevin L. Whitworth takes a blowtorch to the subscription-obsessed, loyalty-scammed, AI-gaslit reality we now call "late-stage capitalism." From monthly fees for heated car seats to customer service bots trained in psychological warfare, You Will Own Nothing unpacks how everything—literally everything—is being turned into a billable feature.

Whether it’s appliances that stop working if the Wi-Fi drops, or “loyalty” programs that require you to spend $100 to earn a $5 coffee, Whitworth shows how companies have traded customer satisfaction for psychological manipulation—and how we’ve all become willing participants in the con.

Inside this book, you’ll discover:

• Why canceling a subscription is now harder than canceling a wedding.
• How loyalty programs trick you into spending more while promising to “reward” you.
• What the future holds (spoiler: it's a fridge that charges you extra to stay cold).
• And how to fight back with humor, rage, and just enough petty defiance to make Jeff Bezos nervous.

This is the guidebook for anyone who’s ever yelled at a chatbot, questioned why their lightbulbs need firmware updates, or simply misses the good old days when buying something meant it was yours.

Funny, furious, and uncomfortably accurate—You Will Own Nothing is part consumer survival manual, part cultural roast, and 100% subscription-free.