When it comes to life's fun and games, always know: The rules. What's at stake. When to quit. Wise words from...well...my fortune cookie. But wise words, nonetheless.

Reed freaking Rivers. I wouldn’t trust a word out of the arrogant music mogul’s mouth if his gold-plated tongue were notarized. The Man with the Midas Touch would say anything to get me into his bed, and I know it. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want him to succeed.

Blind dates? Online dating profiles? Been there, done that. Georgia Cummings has zero luck with dating, and the era of the Internet is not her friend. No matter how fast she runs, how many corners she turns, she can't find her way out of this weird, alternate universe where men think dick pics are a replacement for small talk and getting to know a girl. One more crotch selfie and she might write men off for good. But why can't she stop fantasizing about him?

Hermosa Beach seems to be the place for throwing together unlikely opposites. My rooster Rowdy and his new crush, Pixy the goat. Me and the obnoxiously cocky cowboy from Texas.... But unlike Rowdy and Pixy, there’s no way I’m going to fall for David Strickland. Nope. Not gonna happen. I could never be with a man so completely opposed to everything I believe...no matter how hot he is.

Adrian Savage: I'm obsessed with popstar Laila Fitzgerald, the opener on my band’s world tour. I tried to stay away when my bandmate said he was crushing on her. But in trying to do the right thing by my best friend, I've done the wrong thing by myself. I've pushed Laila away so hard, she hates my guts. In fact, I’m pretty sure I’m her sworn enemy by now. The kicker? For a sick f*ck like me, that only makes me want her even more.