A Guide to Making Decisions, Then Changing Your Mind 47 Times

WARNING: This is NOT a book for decisive people. If you know what you want in life and confidently make choices without having a full-blown existential meltdown, please move along.

This book is for overthinkers, procrastinators, and chronically indecisive disasters who would rather launch themselves into the sun than commit to literally anything. If you’ve ever:

Spent an hour picking a movie, only to give up and rewatch The Office.
Polled multiple friends about a minor decision, then ignored their advice.
Stared at a restaurant menu like it was a life-or-death situation.
Regretted a choice the second you made it.
Overanalyzed a text message for so long that you never sent it.

Congratulations—you have Decision Paralysis, and this book will make you feel seen.
Inside, you’ll find absolutely zero useful strategies for overcoming indecision, but you will get:

• A breakdown of why your brain refuses to let you make choices like a normal person.
• An in-depth look at why picking a dinner spot with friends always ends in silent rage.
• A highly scientific decision-making flowchart (spoiler: you still won’t pick anything).
• A chance to laugh at your own dysfunction instead of actually fixing it.

So, should you buy this book?
Yes.
No.
Maybe.
Let me think about it first.

(You’ll probably just add it to your cart and stare at it for six weeks, but hey—at least that’s on brand.)