She has been dumped seventeen times. Not spectacularly, not always cruelly—just consistently, awkwardly, and in ways that seem to suggest love is happening somewhere just slightly out of frame.

There is the man who cannot stand her laugh. The situationship who vanishes mid-text. The emotionally “nearly ready” man who is always ready for someone else. A festival boyfriend lost to mud, a holiday marriage acquired by accident, and a perfect relationship that turns out to come with an unexpected second fiancée and a small cheese empire.

Each time, she adjusts. Reflects. Tries again.

Each time, she wonders if she is the problem—or if love itself is simply mislaid.

Lost Property of the Heart is a sharp, warm, darkly funny journey through modern romance in all its absurd forms. From the painfully relatable to the wildly improbable, it follows one woman’s long, chaotic education in what love is supposed to be—and what it actually looks like when it refuses to behave.

But after seventeen almosts, something begins to shift. Not in a dramatic reinvention, not in a grand epiphany—just in the quiet decision to stop auditioning for love, and start living again.

And then, when she least expects it, love arrives not as a twist, not as a rescue, but as something far more unsettling:

It stays.

Witty, painfully honest, and quietly hopeful, Lost Property of the Heart is a story about what happens when you stop chasing the idea of being chosen… and discover what it means to simply be met.