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Yes, George Carlin is here with more of what he did better than any other comic: uproarious observations, laser-targeted crankiness, linguistic legerdemain, and inspired weirdness. ("If the shoe fits, get another just like it." "When you sneeze, all the numbers in your head go up by one.") Napalm & Silly Putty is just what his fans have been waiting for—another generous helping of notions, nonsense, assertions, assumptions, mockery, merriment, silliness, sarcasm, and, to be sure, plenty of disturbing references and toxic alienation.

Grammy Winner for Best Spoken Comedy Album
Performed by George Carlin himself, and filled with thoughts, musings, questions, lists, beliefs, curiosities, monologues, assertions, assumptions, and other verbal ordeals, Brain Droppings is infectiously funny.

New! Don't miss our AudibleComedy combo, featuring original humor from standups Greg Proops and Steve Marmel.

Can jokes win a hostile room, a hopeless argument, or even an election? You bet they can, according to Cicero, and he knew what he was talking about. One of Rome's greatest politicians, speakers, and lawyers, Cicero was also reputedly one of antiquity's funniest people. After he was elected commander-in-chief and head of state, his enemies even started calling him "the stand-up Consul". How to Tell a Joke provides a lively new translation of Cicero's essential writing on humor alongside that of the later Roman orator and educator Quintilian.  

On the 12th floor of the Acme Building, on a cold February day in St. Paul, Guy Noir looks down the barrel of a loaded revolver in the hands of geezer gangster Joey Roast Beef, who is demanding to hear what lucrative scheme Guy is cooking up with stripper-turned-women's-studies-professor Naomi Fallopian. Everyone wants to know, and Guy faces them one by one, as he and Naomi pursue a dream of earning gazillions by selling a surefire method of dramatic weight loss.

A compendium of quotes and riffs by P.J. O'Rourke on subjects ranging from government to fishing to apps, to be published on what would have been his seventy-fifth birthday.

The Byzantine Fire is much more than a flawless ninety-carat ruby. As a stone it's worth over a million dollars, a value vastly increased by its pure gold band - but its history is what makes it priceless. A ring that has been fought for with sword and pen and passed from nation to nation by all manner of theft and trickery, has finally made its way to the United States. The US agrees to return it to Turkey, but it's about to be stolen twice more.

A mysterious virus has infiltrated the good people of Lake Wobegon, transmitted via unpasteurized cheese made by a Norwegian bachelor farmer, the effect of which is episodic loss of social inhibition. Mayor Alice, Father Wilmer, Pastor Liz, the Bunsens and Krebsbachs, formerly taciturn elders, burst into political rants, inappropriate confessions, and rhapsodic proclamations, while their teenagers watch in amazement. Meanwhile, a wealthy outsider is buying up farmland for a Keep America Truckin' motorway and amusement park.

Alexandra Petri's US History contains a lost (invented!) history of America. (A history for people disappointed that the only president whose weird sex letters we have is Warren G. Harding.) Petri's "historical fan fiction" draws on real events and completely absurd fabrications to create a laugh-out-loud, irreverent takedown of our nation's complicated past. A witty, absurdist satire of the last 500 years, Alexandra Petri's US History is the fake textbook you never knew you needed.

From the New York Times bestselling author of Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow and The Storied Life of A. J. Fikry comes an enchanting story about love in its many forms, and a man's timeless journey into the unknowable territory of the woman he loves. From the moment they first sleep together—piled atop seven mattresses in her dorm room—N. is drawn into a rich and enchanted relationship with Margaret Towne, a woman who will introduce him to worlds he never knew existed.

In the novel Who's Who When Everyone Is Someone Else, the character "C. D. Rose" searches an unnamed middle-European city for the long-lost manuscript of a little-known writer named Maxim Guyavitch. That search was fruitless, but in The Blind Accordionist, "C. D. Rose" has found the manuscript—nine sparkling, fable-like short stories—and he presents them here with an (hilarious) introduction explaining the discovery, and an afterword providing (hilarious) critical commentary on the stories, and what they might reveal about the mysterious Guyavitch.

Just when things have finally cooled down for 88-year-old Maud after the disturbing discovery of a dead body in her apartment in Gothenburg, a couple of detectives return to her doorstep. Though Maud dodges their questions with the skill of an Olympic gymnast a fifth of her age, she wonders if suspicion has fallen on her, little old lady that she is. The truth is, ever since Maud was a girl, death has seemed to follow her....

Maya's been able to get by in New York on her wits and a dead-end bookstore job for years, but when her husband leaves her and her favorite professor ends their affair, her barely-calibrated life descends into chaos, and she has to make some choices. Maya's struggle to be alone, to be a woman, and to be thoughtful and imperfect and alive in a world that doesn't really care what happens to her is rendered with dead-eyed clarity and unnerving charm. This book takes every tired trope about addiction and recovery, "likeable" characters, and redemption narratives and blows them to pieces.

This is a collection of calls about cars, animals, and the mysterious, often hilarious times when they meet. It leads Tom and Ray down a familiar path of wild speculation, occasionally brilliant suggestions, and lots of laughs. This is a must-have for anyone who loves animals, particularly the two that host Car Talk.

Dog lovers will delight in this audio celebration of the canine character. From our earliest encounters with Lassie, to the magical moments we share with our own imperfect but thoroughly lovable companions, dogs have become an integral part of our culture and beloved members of our family. NPR proudly presents these tales of unforgettable animals and their devoted human friends.

Jews have a centuries-old tradition of telling jokes, from the ghettos of Europe to Hollywood and the Catskills. Jewish jokes are entertainment, the oral history of a culture, insightful social criticism, and survival tactic rolled into one. In 2008, Hollywood director and producer Sam Hoffman launched a website called Old Jews Telling Jokes. It’s just what it says: Jewish men and women over 60 sharing their favorite stories, tales, riddles, and punchlines.

Looking for an alternative to the seriously reliable, soothing yet informative sound of NPR? Try NPR! Prepare to be surprised by this collection of interviews with some of the funniest personalities on the planet, and by the memorable, unbelievable news that delights NPR listeners on the 1st of April each year.

This eclectic collection gathers all-time "Driveway Moment" favorites, including some suggested by listeners themselves. These literate, intelligent, profoundly touching stories are worth hearing over and over again, and now you don't have to stay in your car. What is a Driveway Moment? Maybe it's happened to you as it has to countless others.... You're driving home, listening to a story on NPR. Suddenly, you find yourself in your driveway (or parking space or parking garage).

These fun and easy exercises from the best-selling Keep Your Brain Alive fight the effects of mental aging and keep the mind fit to meet any challenge. And now they are available on audio. Co-author Manning Rubin is your personal trainer, providing lively narration to guide you through the exercises.

Most NPR listeners have experienced at least one "driveway moment": You’re so captivated by a story, interview, or essay you’re hearing on the radio that you sit in your driveway, motor running, to hear it all the way through. Even if the ice cream is melting in the trunk. The latest collection of this best-selling series features memorable tales, bits, and commentary from NPR favorites, regulars, and guests. Smartly chosen, sincerely hilarious, this collection will leave you in stitches.

Moms have served honorably in the minivan wars, negotiated conflicting advice between husbands and fathers, and even extracted sticky sippy cups from under countless seats. Tom and Ray Magliozzi, aka Click and Clack, the Tappet Brothers, answer calls about - and from - mothers, answering questions and giving advice on cars, families, and cutting the apron strings.