for a lot of parents, the autism journey doesn’t stop with their child’s diagnosis.

at some point… it starts to feel personal.

you hear the questions during an evaluation,

you start learning more about autism,

and suddenly you’re thinking: “this sounds like me…”

in this episode, dr. tay walks through what this process actually looks like — why it’s so common, why it can feel complicated, and how it can impact not just you, but your relationship and your entire family dynamic.

because this isn’t just about understanding your child.

it’s about understanding yourself and what that means for how you move forward.

⚡️ other episodes referenced in this episode: 180, 189, 208

⚡️ autism traits guide — a resource to help you understand diagnostic criteria and recognize patterns across ages and presentations

⚡️ neurodiverse communication masterclass with Dr. Ali — tools and strategies to support communication and connection in your relationship

⚡️ learn more about dr. tay’s whole family approach + clinical services, including booking a free consult call for our adult evaluations

• why so many parents begin questioning their own neurotype after their child’s diagnosis
• how this realization often unfolds (and why it doesn’t always happen right away)
• the likelihood of parents being neurodivergent and why this matters
• the grief that can come with realizing you weren’t supported or accommodated in the same way
• how self-exploration can feel both clarifying and overwhelming
• where to start if you’re exploring your own neurotype (including self-identification vs evaluation)
• why understanding diagnostic criteria is key — not just relying on social media
• why loved ones may resist or struggle to understand this process
• how this shift can impact your relationship dynamic and communication
• why many couples feel more disconnected during this stage and what’s actually happening underneath
• the importance of understanding patterns in communication, not just surface-level conflict
• how learning new communication tools can support your entire family system

00:00 when the autism journey starts to feel personal

03:12 are parents of autistic kids more likely to be neurodivergent?

05:28 how parents begin exploring their own neurotype

09:25 should you consider an adult autism evaluation?

10:40 what happens when others don’t understand

16:00 why relationships can feel harder after a diagnosis

20:45 how to start improving communication as a couple

if you’ve ever found yourself googling late at night…

“is this autism?”

and somehow ended up more confused than when you started — you’re not alone.

there’s a lot of information out there.

and many time it doesn’t help you actually make sense of what you’re seeing in your child.

in this episode, dr. tay breaks down the most common questions parents are searching and why those questions often lead to more confusion instead of clarity.

you’ll learn how to move beyond one-off traits and start understanding the patterns that actually matter when it comes to autism so you can feel more confident in what you’re noticing and how to advocate for your child.

• why googling “is this autism?” often leads to more confusion (not clarity)
• the difference between a developmental delay vs. autism and when to look deeper
• how to think through “is this autism or something else?” (like ADHD, anxiety, or sensory differences)
• why no single trait can confirm or rule out autism
• how autism is identified through patterns, not isolated behaviors
• what to consider when your child seems “fine at school” but struggles at home
• how masking and environment can impact what others see (or don’t see)
• why “wait and see” advice can sometimes delay needed support
• how to trust your instincts, even when others aren’t concerned
• how to better articulate what you’re seeing so providers actually listen

00:00 introduction to common parental questions about autism

05:30 is this autism or just a delay?

08:02 is this autism or something else?

11:54 can my child be autistic and still do x, y, and z?

19:29 they’re fine at school, but not at home — could it still be autism?

23:04 doctors say to wait and see — should i?

27:24 am I overreacting or just anxious?

⚡️ autism traits guide — a $7 resource to help you understand diagnostic criteria, recognize patterns, and advocate with clarity

⚡️join EVOLVE the membership and submit your questions for dr. tay to answer

⚡️learn more about dr. tay’s whole family approach + clinical services

⚡️ follow on >>

instagram → @the.dr.tay

tiktok → @the.dr.tay

if your child is a selective eater…

you’ve probably wondered:

are they getting the nutrients they actually need?

and if not, what are you supposed to do about it?

in this episode, Dr. Tay welcomes back registered dietitian Brittyn Coleman to break down one of the most common (and confusing) questions parents have: when to consider supplements, what actually matters nutritionally, and how to make informed decisions without getting lost in the noise.

because while selective eating is common in autistic kids, we can't ignore the impact it has on their body, regulation, and overall well-being.

this conversation will help you understand when to trust your gut, what to look for, and how to approach supplementation in a way that actually supports your child... without overwhelm.

✨ ORDER BEST PART HERE (USE CODE "DRTAY" FOR 10% OFF YOUR FIRST ORDER) ✨

• why selective eating is so common in autistic children and how sensory sensitivities play a role
• how limited diets can lead to nutrient gaps, even when kids are growing “normally”
• a key marker (the “20 food rule”) to help you decide when to seek additional support
• how nutrient deficiencies can impact regulation, energy, and overall functioning
• when supplementation might be helpful and how it fits alongside feeding therapy
• why bloodwork can be helpful (but shouldn’t be a barrier to getting started)
• what to actually look for in a high-quality multivitamin
• why bioavailable nutrients and chelated minerals matter for absorption
• common pitfalls in supplements (including misleading marketing + hidden ingredients)
• how to build trust with your child when introducing supplements
• what makes a supplement safe, effective, and worth considering

00:00 understanding nutritional concerns for autistic children

05:51 identifying when to seek help

10:50 the role of supplements in nutrition

14:51 navigating nutritional testing and its challenges

17:02 choosing the right supplements for your child

24:52 navigating supplement labels

28:18 understanding nutrient absorption

31:39 building trust in supplementation

34:13 the importance of third-party testing

36:46 the development of Best Part

41:54 empowering parents in nutrition

⚡️ Use code "DRTAY" to get 10% off of Best Part | sensory-friendly vitamins for kids >> order here.

⚡️ follow Brittyn on Instagram @autismdietitian and Best Part @bestpartkids

⚡️ interested in Brittyn's picky eating membership? learn more here

⚡️join EVOLVE the membership and submit your questions for Dr. Tay to answer

⚡️learn more about Dr. Tay’s whole family approach + clinical services

⚡️ follow on >>

instagram → @the.dr.tay

tiktok → @the.dr.tay