In this episode of That’s Not Okay, Alyssa dives deep into the world of boundaries in relationships—what they are, why they matter, and why they make some people so angry. Learn how boundaries help you protect your mental, emotional, and spiritual health, and why unhealthy people often react with guilt trips, gaslighting, or rage.

We’ll also explore how attachment styles—anxious, avoidant, and disorganized—affect the way people respond to rejection and “no.” If you’ve ever felt punished for asserting your needs or pressured to tolerate dysfunction, this episode is for you.

Timestamps:

00:00 – Introduction: What are boundaries?

02:15 – Why “No” triggers unhealthy people

06:50 – Boundaries vs. Entitlement

10:30 – How boundaries create healthy love

16:00 – Broken attachment styles & boundaries

25:45 – Internal vs. external boundaries

30:00 – Why narcissistic family systems fear boundaries

37:10 – Final thoughts: Boundaries aren’t selfish—they’re love in action.

Keywords:

boundaries in relationships, how to set boundaries, attachment styles, narcissistic families, red flags in love, emotional health, why people hate boundaries, anxious attachment, avoidant attachment, disorganized attachment

Resources:

Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Henry Cloud and John Townsend

Contact: thatsnotokaypodcast@gmail.com

Links: YouTube & Spotify