Grief doesn’t only take a person. It can take your future in a hundred quiet ways, then surprise you with a wave when you thought you were “doing okay.” Today we’re talking about secondary losses, the ripple effects of loss that show up months and even years later, and why a single milestone like an engagement post, a graduation, or a new baby can drop you right back into the rawness.

Brad, Erin, and Colleen unpack what secondary loss really looks like for parents grieving a spouse or parents grieving a child. We explore the ripple metaphor: the death is the stone hitting the water, and the expanding circles are everything else that changes, identity, routines, traditions, roles at home, friendships, and even your sense of safety in the world. Colleen also shares the “glitter parent and glue parent” idea, and why trying to become both after a death can drain you fast.

We also get practical about supporting grieving children. Kids have secondary losses too, including shifts at school, friendship changes, and the pressure to take on adult responsibilities. We talk about naming what’s changing, giving kids permission to still be kids, and offering small, age-appropriate choices to bring back a sense of control. Finally, we address financial stress, big decisions like moving, and why grief can make thinking clearly harder, plus how to expand your circle so you don’t carry it alone.

If this conversation helps you feel less alone, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a rating and review so more grieving families can find grief support when it matters most.

Order the book When Grief Comes Home: https://a.co/d/ijaiP5L

Jessica's House Resources: https://www.jessicashouse.org/resources

Send us Fan Mail

For more information on Jessica’s House or for additional resources, please go to jessicashouse.org

Grief changes a family’s whole weather system, and parenting through it can feel impossible when you’re trying to protect a child while you’re hurting too. We sit down with Dr. Pamela Gabbay, author of Understanding and Supporting Bereaved Children, to get practical, field-tested guidance on what grieving kids and teens actually need and what adults often get wrong when they’re trying to help.

We talk about why listening is a grief skill, and how one small shift in language can open a door. Dr. Gabbay explains why “How are you feeling?” can backfire, and offers gentler prompts like “I’m wondering what you’re wondering” and “What are you stressed about?” We unpack the myth that kids must talk to heal, and why observing peers, play, art, and simple presence can be just as therapeutic in child grief support.

The conversation also explores how children’s grief evolves across developmental stages, why military family bereavement can be uniquely complex due to relocation, wartime death, and PTSD, and how parents can care for themselves without hiding their pain. We share trusted grief resources and communities such as TAPS Care Groups, The Compassionate Friends, and Soaring Spirits, plus what makes grief camps so powerful for connection and belonging. We close with hope, including post-traumatic growth and the ways support programs can plant seeds that show up years later.

If this helped, subscribe, share it with someone who’s carrying loss at home, and leave a rating and review so more grieving parents can find the support they deserve.

TAPS: https://www.taps.org/

The Compassionate Friends: https://www.compassionatefriends.org/

Soaring Spirits: https://soaringspirits.org/

Order the book Understanding and Supporting Bereaved Children: https://www.amazon.com/Understanding-Supporting-Bereaved-Children-Professionals/dp/0826140483

Order the book When Grief Comes Home: https://a.co/d/ijaiP5L

Jessica's House Resources: https://www.jessicashouse.org/resources

Send us Fan Mail

For more information on Jessica’s House or for additional resources, please go to jessicashouse.org

The hardest losses do not stay neatly private, and when grief becomes public it can feel like you are bleeding in front of a crowd. We sit down again with Davey Blackburn to talk about what happens when a homicide shatters your family and the world has opinions, theories, and headlines. This conversation includes a content warning, because parts of Davey’s story involve the murder of his wife Amanda and their unborn child, yet it also holds real hope for parents who feel like they will never breathe normally again.

We dig into the complexity of grieving under scrutiny, including the unexpected “advantages” of people rallying around you and the crushing disadvantages of being on display in the worst moment of your life. Davey shares what it was like to live through a legal process that dragged on for years, how delays and mistrials can keep trauma reopened, and why someone told him to settle things in his heart before they were ever settled in a courtroom.

We also get practical about the lifelong nature of grief: you do not get over it, you learn to carry it. We talk triggers, anniversaries, the random moments that knock the wind out of you, and why “I shouldn’t feel this” adds unnecessary suffering. Then we move into a tender topic many parents wrestle with quietly: remarriage, blended family life, and learning to embrace joy while still honoring the person who died.

Davey also explains the mission behind Nothing Is Wasted, including coaching, online community, and the Pain to Purpose course designed to help people heal in supportive groups. If you’re looking for grief support resources, we point you toward options through Jessica’s House and the National Alliance for Children’s Grief. Subscribe, share this with a parent who needs it, and leave a review so more grieving families can find this podcast.

Nothing is Wasted: https://www.nothingiswasted.com/

Order the book When Grief Comes Home: https://a.co/d/ijaiP5L

Jessica's House Resources: https://www.jessicashouse.org/resources

Send us Fan Mail

For more information on Jessica’s House or for additional resources, please go to jessicashouse.org