In today’s episode, we'll be talking about what our nervous system does, and let me tell you, when it comes to behavior management and positive parenting, it plays a huge role. So, get cozy, grab your notebook, and let’s dig in!

Alright, friends, we’re going to start by revisiting the concept of temperament, which we've discussed in the past few episodes. Temperament is a crucial factor that influences our attachment and how we interact with the world. As a reminder, temperament affects how we take in information, process our environment, regulate ourselves, and ultimately, how we behave.

In the last episode, we explored the nine traits of temperament and learned that they generally fall into three categories: easy temperament, slow-to-warm temperament, and difficult temperament. It’s easy to get caught up in labeling a child as “difficult” simply because we find them challenging. However, when we talk about temperament, it’s important to focus on the child’s experience, not ours. For example, a child with an easy temperament finds it easier to regulate themselves—they’re flexible, calm quickly, and are generally happy and easygoing. On the other hand, a child who is moody, explosive, or has big outbursts is struggling to regulate themselves. Their behavior is a reflection of how difficult it is for them to feel safe and calm in their environment.

Remember, a child who is having a difficult time isn’t giving you a difficult time—they are experiencing difficulty themselves. This perspective is a major paradigm shift when we think about behavior management. It helps us see that difficult behaviors are often signs that a child is struggling to regulate their nervous system, and temperament plays a huge role in this. It’s important to recognize that temperament is an innate part of who they are—something they didn’t choose but were born with.

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